Ch. 31..40

Ex-Husbands Regret Chapter 31-I don’t like her Rowan.

I stare at my hands. My mom speaks softly to me. “I’m sorry Ro, but he refuses to come to talk to you” I’ve never been this hurt. Not even when Emma broke up with me and left. Noah is angry with me and has refused to answer my calls. Ava was right, Noah should come first and yet I let him down.

I’d decided to take Emma out on my yacht. It was to afford us privacy to talk. She wasn’t very happy after she learned that I had left her to rush to Ava’s side. It was my way of making it up to her. Unfortunately I’d lost complete track of time and my phone’s battery died.

I’ve never seen Ava angry, and yesterday she took me by surprise. The fact that she stood up for Noah and called me out on my behavior left me feeling sort of proud of her. She had a back bone.

after all. It was nice to see that.

“Rowan?” my mom calls out. “I’m going to hang up now” “No, please bring him to the phone. I want to apologize to him” Never has Noah ever refused to talk to me. It was crushing me to know that I had let him down. That I had broken my promise to him.

Mom sighs. “You hurt him, Rowan. He was so excited yesterday. He was looking forward to you hearing all his accomplishments.

He cried while he was talking to Ava after the meeting. Noah never cries and yet you managed to bring forth tears from him” I stare at the wall feeling like the worst scum of the world. I didn’t have a fucking excuse. I should have been in school like I had promised. Instead I was enticing Emma into forgiving me yet again.

“I know that…I heave a breath out, feeling defeated.

“Do you? You’re not the one who had to watch him cry and console him. I’m happy that Emma is back so you can stop hurting and I understand you two are trying to work things out but that doesn’t mean you neglect your responsibilities. You have a son Rowan, he should always come first “You don’t have to tell me that, Ava already chewed my ear off yesterday” I ran my hand through “As she should. She’s a mother and we mothers will do anything for our child even if it means going up against their dad” she finishes, shocking me completely.

Never and I mean never has my mother ever taken Ava’s side. If there was someone who was against Ava from the start, it’s my mother.

“I get it, but can you please try and coerce him into talking to me?” I beg her, something I’m not used to.

She pauses for a while before agreeing. I stay on the phone. Minutes pass and I almost hang up in surrender.

“Hello” comes Noah’s soft voice.

“Hey bud” I begin not really sure what to tell him. “I’m so sorry I didn’t make it to your school yesterday. I got held up somewhere and lost track of time, but I was told that…” He cuts me off before I can finish my sentence.

“It’s because of her isn’t it? Mommy’s sister. She’s the reason why you didn’t go to my teacher’s meeting” his words catch me off guard.

I can’t help the anger that I feel slowly rising. Did Ava tell him about Emma? Was it a way for her to spite me?

“Who told you this, is it your mother?” I ask trying to force the anger down “I’m eight not stupid dad, mommy didn’t tell me anything” I hear a change in his voice and frown.

“What do you mean?” “I saw her in your house that day I called. What was she doing there at night if she’s not your girlfriend? I asked mommy and she told me that I should talk about it with you” he answers leaving me shocked yet again.

Emma has been to my home twice, I didn’t know that during one of those times, Noah had seen het 1 thought that I would have time before I tell him everything “Buddy “Just know that I don’t like her, I will never accept her if you marry her.” He states firmly Fuck, why the hell did I think that Noah would accept her? He was loyal to Ava. Sometimes I think he loves her more. 2 “Is it because she’s not your mother?” maybe he just had a problem with Emma because she wasn’t his mother. Maybe he just feels like she’s taking his mother’s place.

“I just don’t like. Plus she’s mommy’s sister, that’s just wrong dad” he says as a matter of fact. 2 Is it a coincidence that Noah shares the same dislike Ava has for Emma? Could it be that she has been poisoning our son against Emma? I wouldn’t be surprised if she was. 2 “Listen, Noah, I’m dating Emma and I expect you to treat her with respect. One day I’ll probably marry her and she’ll be your step mother. You’ll have to get used to seeing her around” I needed to nip whatever was growing inside him. Noah had to understand that Emma wasn’t going anywhere.

“Never” he shouts defiantly through the phone.

“Noah…” “If you like her then fine but just know I will never accept her. I will never like her and she will never be any kind of mother to me.” He all but growls.

Before I can say anything else, he hangs up the phone. I immediately call again but it’s switched off. I stare at my phone dumbfounded. Not understanding what the hell had gotten into him.

He has never been hateful towards anyone, but for some reason he hates Emma even though he doesn’t even know. 3 I feel like I’ve just made everything worse. That he was now even more pissed at me.

I don’t get the time to dwell on those thoughts. The door to my mansion opens and Emma walks in smiling. I had given her a key a few weeks back.

I look at her beautiful face. We were finally together after such a long fucking time. I thought that things would fall into place and yet the opposite seemed to be happening. Everything seemed to be working against us.

“Rowan?” she calls me “What Emma?” I was frustrated by Noah’s behavior and his reaction towards Emma.

How could I be with her if son is against it? What the fuck was I supposed to do.

“Talk to me Ro, you know I’m here for you” she pleads.

Her broken voice makes me look at her. Her eyes were pleading. Like she truly wanted to share in what was weighing me down.

I ran my hand through my hair and release a sigh.

“I got into a disagreement with Noah” I confess.

A frown mars her beautiful face. “Is it about yesterday?” “Part of it, but majority is that he saw you here one day. He doesn’t like it and apparently he doesn’t like you. How am I supposed to deal with this? I love you both and I will never choose. So how am I supposed to be with you when my son doesn’t like you?” I ask. Noah had placed me in a hard place. @

She’s quiet for a while. She stares into nothing before her blue eyes come back to mine.

“Is this the reason why you’ve been distant? I’ve been back for a couple of months and you’re yet to kiss me or touch me. Is Noah’s reluctance to accept me holding you back?” What could I fucking say? Every time I want to kiss her or she wants to kiss me, something hold me back. Instead I find myself pushing her away or pecking her cheek or forehead but never her mouth.

Is something wrong with because I just didn’t understand. I’ve pinning for this woman since I was twenty one and now that I have her, I can’t even bring myself to kiss her.

“Yes” I lie to her. There was no need to hurt her more than I already have.

We stay quiet. My mind reeling from my thoughts.

Ex-Husbands Regret Chapter 32-Dead to me Ava.

+15 BONUS I was happy today. Not only had my dinner date with Ethan gone well, but I was going to go back to work tomorrow and the day after that will be my birthday.

Just like I had predicted on Saturday, Ethan had managed to help me forget. A few minutes after getting to his place, I was already laughing my ass off.

He cooked, and he didn’t disappoint. The food was absolutely delicious. There was just something about a man that can cook and make you laugh. It ended up being a happy and fun night. It got better when I came back home and I was able to talk to Noah.

He had calmed down a bit. We chatted about everything and nothing at all, before he fell asleep still on the phone. It had been the highlight of my day.

I was baking when someone knocked on my door. I was craving some comfort food so I decided on cookies and chocolate cake.

Wiping my hands with the kitchen towel, I went and opened my door. Part of me was shocked when I came face to face with Emma. The other part wasn’t. 1 “What do you want, Emma?” I ask in irritation.

The fact that she was here didn’t spell good things. The last time she was here, I was almost killed a couple of hours after fighting with her.

Her face is stony when she answers “We need to talk” My whole being rebelled against the idea. Against my better judgement I let her in and lead her to my living room 2 “Say what you came to say and the leave” I take a sea and watch carefully as she does the same.

She is quiet as she surveys my home. She sneers after her inspection is over, I roll my eyes. Of course this doesn’t meet her standards It isn’t flashy nor expensive. It was simple and homely.

“Are you going to smeei at my home the whole day or are you going to talk? 1lean back into the chat and study her.

+15 BONUS I doubt Emma knew the difference between a home and a house. Mine was a home, it had a warmth to it while what Emma liked was a huge expensive house that looks clinical and cold.

Tm here to tell you to stay away from Noalt” she says crossing her legs.

I sigh “Seriously? You came all the way to my house for this nonsense again?” I was getting tired of repeating the same thing over and over again. How will I make her understand that I wasn’t one bit interested in Rowan?

The man has caused me so much heartache, so why would I want him back?

“It’s not nonsense. He wants to move on with me but you keep dragging him back to you. Can’t you just let him go? He doesn’t love you for heaven’s sake!” The last sentence shouldn’t hurt but it does. I don’t want to be reminded that I fell in love with a man that hates me. That even after years of trying, his heart still remained inaccessible to me.

“And how have I dragged him back? hmm?” “The attack two weeks ago. He rushed here in the middle of our movie night just because he heard you were hurt” I shake my head at her. She’s considered to be the top lawyer yet she was dumber than an ostrich.

“How’s that my fault, Emma. He is your man so why don’t you put a fucking leash on him” I snap.

Why the hell were we even having this conversation? Didn’t she realize that she won? That she got the guy? That I wanted nothing more than to move on with my life.

I found a great man and I was hoping my relationship with Ethan will lead somewhere. I didn’t want the drama with Emma and Rowan affecting what we were building.

“I still think that you’re doing all these things to get attention and sympathy from him” she mocks, sneering at me like she said the most intelligent thing.

“Get out!” I stand up and point at the direction of the door. novelbin I was done with her nonsense. I won’t allow her to tarnish the joy I was feeling today.

She stands up too. “What? You don’t like that I’ve discovered your plan. It’s only a matter of time before everyone realizes that all these attacks are fake” +15 BONUS “Are you done showing me how stupid you are?” I ask. “You think I’m faking these attacks, but do you want to know what I think? I think you’re behind them. I have no enemies except for you and who would benefit if I were to tragically die? It’s you.

With me out of the way you have Rowan all to yourself and you won’t have to deal with seeing me around because full custody will go to Rowan” She stares at me as if in shock. Either she’s shocked that I figured it out or shocked that I brazenly accused her. I’ve been thinking about it a lot and it made sense.

Emma could want me dead because of two things. One, revenge and two to cut me off completely ⚫ from Rowan’s life because for some stupid reason she felt threatened by me.

“How dare you!” she screams at me.

“No, how dare you, come to my home spouting bullshit. We’re no longer kids, Emma, so grow up and act like the fucking adult you are… Now leave, I’m done with your nonsense” 1 She’s angry. It’s written all over her face. I’m sure if looks could kill then I would be an ancestor by now. It doesn’t faze me though. I wasn’t going to let any of them walk all over me.

I tap my legs impatiently. “Are you going to leave or do you want me to drag you out?” With a click of her tongues she turns to leave and I sigh in relief. That moment of relief soon ends when she turns to me.

“One more thing, keep your freaking son out of my business” she says angrily.

“What did you just say?” my voice takes on a warning note.

I must have heard her wrong because she didn’t just curse at Noah.

“I won’t let him get in the way of my relationship simply because he doesn’t like me. He’s a damn brat and once I’m married to Rowan, I’m going to have him shipped to a boarding school. Who does he think he is? He’s still a dam kid and he has no say in adult issues. So you either control the brat or I sear you’ll be seeing twice every year The sound that echoes takes her by surprise. She swivels her head in my direction. Her hand cradling her check “Did you just slap me?” her wide eyes begin to fill with tears.

My hand was tingling from the impact, but I ignored it “Yes, and if you don’t fucking lears rights +15 BONUS “You’ll pay for this” she screams before stomping out of my house and banging the door behind her.

How could Rowan want such a woman around Noah? I still couldn’t believe the vile things she said about my son. What the hell happened to Emma? She was never this cruel, aloof yes, but never cruel.

I lean against the wall and catch my breath. My day was now ruined. The happiness I was feeling a few minutes ago had vanished.

The oven dings and I go to take out the cookies. I look at them but the excitement to eat them was now gone. Leaving them to cool, I instead go and watch a movie.

An hour later and my mind was still in turmoil. I didn’t even know what the movie was about. Deciding to take a bath, I switch off the TV.

I was just walking upstairs when the continuous ringing of my doorbell stops me. I sigh in defeat and go to open it, thinking it was one of the many girl or boy scout selling cookies.

Staring at the angry face of Rowan makes me wish I hadn’t opened my door. Before I can react, he pushes me inside then closes the door. He continuous pushing until we stop at the space between the foyer, kitchen and living room.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” Rowan booms, making me shiver from his anger.

“What?” “Did you think that Emma wouldn’t tell me? Or did you think I wouldn’t notice the hand imprint left of her cheek by you” He starts pacing. His words sink in and it dawns on me the reason why he was here.

“You don’t understand” I try to explain my reasons but he doesn’t let me.

“Understand what? That you slapped her for no apparent reason? That you accused her of being the one after you when you have no fucking proof? Or do you want me to understand all the vile things you told her he advances, his eyes blazing.

I don’t know what she told him but I’m sure she lied and didn’t tell him everything.

won’t let you hurt Emma, you get me, Ava? If you so much as ever lay your filthy hands on her +15 BONUS her” he warns, his voice dangerously low.

This was a side to Rowan I’ve never seen and for the first time in my life, I was scared of him “Rowan, it wasn’t like that, she…” He cuts me off. “She what? Fought back against your insults and told you I never loved you? She was fucking right. Listen to me and listen good, Ava, you’re nothing and you will remain to be nothing. You brag to her about sleeping with me when the truth is I fucked you because you were convenient.” He said with an evil glint in his eyes.

“Please stop” I pleaded with him but he didn’t.

“You tried being descent fuck but you weren’t even good at it. Every time I was inside you, it’s Emma I wanted, it’s Emma I imagined beneath me. Every time I cummed, it’s her face I saw. You were nothing special, just easy and so I used you. I used you like the fucking slut you are” For the second time that day, I slapped someone. His head swivels from the impact of my hand. Tears were rolling down my face. Every word he said cutting me to pieces.

“Leave Rowan, and never step foot inside my house again. Take your bodyguards with you. I don’t want or need your help and I don’t you anywhere near me ever again. From today you’re dead to me” I tell him brokenly, the fight completely leaving my body.

I turn around and take the first step up the stairs. I stop but I don’t look back at him.

“I’m giving you two minutes to leave before I call the cops on you.” I warn before continuing up the stairs.

I get in to my room and lock it. Minutes later I hear him leave. Once he does, I fall to the ground and break. a Rowan just destroyed me and he didn’t even need any weapon. His words have completely. shattered my soul, probably leaying nothing behind.

I continue crying. The tears pouring from me endlessly. My chest felt constricted and my heart was in pieces. He broke me over lies told by a jealous woman.

I was going to pick myself up. I was going to move forward, but for every hurtful word he threw at me. Karma was going to get him and that bitch that calls herself my sister. For what he has done today, I will never forgive him nor forget.

Ex-Husbands Regret Chapter 33-Drowning my pain My phone rings for the hundredth time today. Letty’s name flashes but just like those other times, I ignore her calls. She’s been trying to call me since yesterday.

I wasn’t in the right frame of mind to talk to her. She was still connected to the world and people I wanted to stay away from. That left me at crossroads. 1 “Give me another” I ask the bartender immediately after my phone stops ringing.

Today was my birthday and this is how I was celebrating it. Alone in a bar, drinking some fruity kind of concoction, still hurting from Rowan’s vile words.

I’ve tried so much to push those thoughts away. I’ve tried harder to forget every word he threw at me, but it’s hard. They’re imprinted in my damn head like a fucking tattoo.

We’ve been married for years, yet it never crossed my mind that he thought of me as nothing but a slut. That he was using me as a substitute for Emma in bed. My heart has broken over and over again since that day at my house.

I should have been surprised that he chose to believe every single word Emma said but I’m not. It’s typical of him to believe everyone except the woman he has lived with for nine fucking years.

Whoever said that words hurts more than punches was right. This time I fear that Rowan might have broken me beyond repair.

“Here” the cute bartender tells me.

He looks at me in sympathy, probably knowing that I was here to drown my sorrows. He must have seen this kind of thing thousands of time.

I take the drink from him, while avoiding his eyes. I didn’t need his sympathy. What I need is a new brain. A a new heart that isn’t tainted by pain and heartbreak. A soul unmarked by Rowan’s cruelty.

If I knew this was the future that awaited me years back, I would have ran for the hills. If I knew loving Rowan would destroy me in this manner, I would have flee to another continent, hell, another planet, just to escape him.

I wish I could smack some sense into my younger self. Maybe then I could have avoided all this heart ache +15 BONUS novelbin Sipping my drink, I stare into nothing. My mind completely lost. I wasn’t drunk yet but I was starting to feel the buzz. That’s what I wanted. I needed a break from the constant pain. Drinking my ass off was going to give me that reprieve even if it’s just for a few hours.

I down the rest of my drink and look to the dance floor. There were people dancing. I haven’t danced in such a long time. I wanted to let loose. After all, today was my fucking birthday.

Getting up, I move to the floor. I close my eyes and let the music take over. I start to move to the beat. Feeling my problems start to fade for a little bit. Here in this moment I could pretend that I was okay. That I wasn’t a broken vessel walking. Here in this moment I could pretend that I was whole.

I dance song after song. Trying to chase a type of numbness. I feel people come up behind me to dance, I still don’t open my eyes, even when I’m grinding against them.

Some men try to get me to come with them, but I decline. I ignore them and eventually they give up and leave.

When I feel tiredness start to seep into my bones, I stop, open my eyes and head to the bar. I sit down on the barstool and order another drink, just as my phone rings again I was about to ignore it, thinking it was Letty, but instead I see Ethan’s name flashing.

I decided to accept the call.

“Hi Ethan” I frown because my voice was a little high pitched than normal.

“Where are you Ava, are you okay? Would you mind telling me why Letty woke me up completely out of her mind with worry saying she hasn’t been able to reach you since yesterday?” he asks me worriedly.

I wanted to know how she got his number, but then I remembered that I gave it to her. She had insisted on having it the first day I went out with Ethan, just in case she didn’t hear from me.

“I’m okay I just don’t want to talk to her right now” I muttered loudly.

The music wasn’t too loud but it was loud all the same.

“Are you at a club or something?” he asks just as someone screams that the music playing was their favorite songs.

“Sort of” +15 BONUS “Are you drunk?” “Just tipsy” I answer, though I was planning to drink myself to oblivion this once.

“Do you have a designated driver?” I giggle at that. His cop character was coming out to play and I liked that. I also liked that he was concerned about how I would get home.

“No, but I plan to take a taxi” I answered.

“No, you won’t Give me ten minutes” he says before hanging up.

I frown at my phone. Wondering why he said that. Deciding that it wasn’t that important, I push it to the back of my mind. Today was all about forgetting and letting myself go.

I don’t know how long it was when I feel someone sliding in the seat next to mine. I look up and I’m surprised to find Ethan’s blue eyes staring at me.

“Ethan, how are you here?” I ask in confusion “I told you I’d be here in ten when we talked, don’t you remember?” he asked back I continue staring at him like he was a dream. Still unable to understand how he was here and how he found me.

“I remember, I just didn’t take you seriously” He studies me and I study him back. Don’t get me wrong, I liked him, but I just didn’t want to see. him right now. Tonight was my night of drowning my pain.

“What are you doing here, Ava? I’ve never taken you to be the kind of person to be out drinking at this time of night. Especially not on a school night, aren’t you going to work tomorrow?” he frowned. His face etched in worry.

I wasn’t going to work tomorrow. After what happened with Rowan, I didn’t feel like myself. I had asked the school board for an extension of my temporary leave. They had been pretty understanding especially after I lied that I wasn’t fully recovered yet.

“It’s my birthday, I just wanted to celebrate” I tell him instead By now the music had been turned off so I didn’t have to shout to be heard Majority we +15 BONUS “All alone? In a bar, at almost two in the morning?” How do I tell him that I had no one to celebrate my birthday with? That no one even remembers the day I was born? Even when I was married to Rowan, he used to forget and ignore my birthday each year. How do I tell him that my family hates me so much that they stopped celebrating my birthdays nine years ago?!

I shrug my shoulders. “There’s no one to celebrate with me. I would have celebrated with Noah but as you know he isn’t here. The rest of my family hates me so much that they don’t care if I turned a year older” He looks a bit shocked at my words for a moment before recovering. He gets down from his barstool and helps me down. Silently taking my hand, he leads me to a private booth where he helps me sit then sits right next to me.

He then turns and faces. “Why do you say that? I know something happened with your family, it’s written all over your face.” He pauses for a while before continuing. “Does it have something to do with Rowan, what happened? I see the pain you try to hide. Why do you say your family hates you?” the shoot from his mouth like sharp arrows.

Is I stare at him. If I was going to try and build a relationship with Ethan then I had to come clean. What I did could ruin my image in his eyes but he needed to know the truth either.

I take a deep breath. “It’s because when I was eighteen I slept with Emma’s boyfriend and ended pregnant.” Evelyn M.M Author Please don’t kill me. Ava’s past will be revealed in the next chapter. Bye.

Ex-Husbands Regret Chapter 34-The past Nine years ago. My phones pings with a new notification waking me up from yet another restless sleep. For some reason, I haven’t been able to sleep well for the past two years. Part of me thinks it’s because of Rowan. That my heart and head aren’t at peace because he isn’t near me anymore. My restlessness started when he joined university two years ago. During the time he’s away at Uni, I rarely sleep but when he’s home for the breaks, I sleep like a baby. Groaning at yet another night without sleep, I wake up and check my phone. I’m surprised but it quickly turns to happiness when I see what the notification is. I paid someone money to install an app that lets me track Rowan every time he’s around. Right now it just notified me that he was home. Jumping out of bed, I get dressed quickly. He was probably back with Emma or maybe Travis or Gabe, but I didn’t mind. I just wanted to see him even if it’s from a far. Once I’m done getting ready, I sneak out through my bedroom window. I had the furthest room in the house. It’s nearly Impossible for my parents or the maids to hear me leaving. I get safely down and begin walking. Taking my phone out, I order an Uber. “This is a terrible idea!” a voice niggles in my sub–consciousness I ignore it. My head is already swimming with visions of my Rowan. I haven’t seen him in months and my eyes were dying to feast on him. “Ava, go back home. You’re making a mistake” the voice continues shouting. I stop in my tracks. That isn’t right. Nothing about Rowan would ever be a mistake. Cementing that in my head, I push all other thoughts to the back of my mind. Minutes later, my ride arrives. “Please, Ava, turn back” the damn voice pleads with me just as I am getting into the car. I feel torn. Like I was fighting against my own mind and body. Finally I manage to push the thought aside and get inside the car. +15 BONUS I should have listened to its warning. Another thirty minutes, we arrive at a bar. I pay the guy and get out. I stare at the dingy place wondering what the hell Rowan was doing here. This wasn’t his kind of scene. 1 Squaring my shoulders, I walk towards it and manage to get in using a fake ID. Quickly, I walk to a hidden spot and survey the place looking for him. I locate him within seconds, surprised to find he was alone. I stay hidden for a while. Waiting to see if any of the others will arrive but none of them do. He was here alone. “You’ve feasted your eyes, now let’s leave” damn that stupid voice. I ignore it completely. This might be my chance to get him to notice me. Now that he was here alone and Emma wasn’t by his side. I take a deep breath and walk the short distance to him. “Hey Rowan” I greet shyly. He turns and gives me a blinding smile. Catching me off guard. We rarely talk and he has always gone to great lengths to ignore and avoid me, so the smile catches me off guard. “It’s little Ava” he shouts. “How are you doing?” he asks . It’s then I realize he was completely drunk. That was the only reason he looked so happy and receptive towards me. I take the chair next to him. Immediately he orders me a drink. I take my first taste and it was disgusting. I have never drank in my life but I force myself to do it. “So how’s school?” I ask, feeling myself relax little by little. He smirks and nudges my shoulder. “Is that really what you want to ask me?” “No, I want to ask what you’re doing here drinking alone but I didn’t want to come off as rude.” He sways in his seat as he leans forward. “Aren’t you sweet” he says then goes back to drinking. “Are you okay?” I ask in concern. He wasn’t acting like his normal self fie ignores me and continues drinking. I continue drinking too and just keep it Watína ř I should have listened to its warning. Another thirty minutes, we arrive at a bar. I pay the guy and get out. I stare at the dingy place wondering what the hell Rowan was doing here. This wasn’t his kind of scene. Squaring my shoulders, I walk towards it and manage to get in using a fake ID. Quickly, I walk to a hidden spot and survey the place looking for him. I locate him within seconds, surprised to find he was alone. I stay hidden for a while. Waiting to see if any of the others will arrive but none of them do. He was here alone. “You’ve feasted your eyes, now let’s leave” damn that stupid voice. I ignore it completely. This might be my chance to get him to notice me. Now that he was here alone and Emma wasn’t by his side. I take a deep breath and walk the short distance to him. “Hey Rowan” I greet shyly. He turns and gives me a blinding smile. Catching me off guard. We rarely talk and he has always gone to great lengths to ignore and avoid me, so the smile catches me off guard. “It’s little Ava” he shouts. “How are you doing?” he asks. It’s then I realize he was completely drunk. That was the only reason he looked so happy and receptive towards me. I take the chair next to him. Immediately he orders me a drink. I take my first taste and it was disgusting. I have never drank in my life but I force myself to do it. “So how’s school?” I ask, feeling myself relax little by little. He smirks and nudges my shoulder. “Is that really what you wantnovelbin to ask me?” “No, I want to ask what you’re doing here drinking alone but I didn’t want to come off as rude.” He sways in his seat as he leans forward. “Aren’t you sweet” he says then goes back to drinking Are you okay?” I ask in concem. He wasn’t acting like his normal self. He ignores me and continues drinking, I continue drinking too and just keep quiet Waiting for +15 BONUS “She doesn’t want to marry me” he says after a while. I stare at him. I was already feeling a kind of buzz. “Who? Emma?” “Yes, I asked her to marry me. I had the ring and I proposed. I even took her to a special place and got down on one knee. I did everything right but she still turned me down.” I look at him in shock. Unable to believe that he had asked her to marry him. I’m hurt, but I push it down. “She said that she wasn’t ready. That she wants to focus on school first. Why didn’t she want to marry me? Doesn’t she love me?” he ask, his voice full of hurt and pain. I didn’t know what to say. Part of me was glad she turned him down, while the other hurt on his behalf because I could see that it was tearing him apart. “You are awesome Rowan. If she doesn’t want to marry you then that’s her loss. I say fuck her, you can do so much better” I raise my drink up. He stares at me for a while before smiling. “You’re right, fuck her” he slurs as he clinks our glasses. I don’t know for how long we stay there. We talk, dance and drink. By the time we were leaving we were both drunk, him more so than me. He suggest I share his hotel room and I agree. I couldn’t go home drunk. My parents would skin me alive given I could barely stand straight. He calls a cab and a few minutes later we are in his room The moment the door closes behind us, he is on me. Kissing me and touching me. He rips my clothes off until I’m left in nothing but my panties. “Fuck! I’ve been waiting for this for so long” he slurs, while removing his own clothes. Igiggle. “Me too..are you sure you want this? You want me?” This seem too good to be true. That I was finally getting the man of my dream. “Definitely” He leads me to the bed. Everything is a blur. I feel his touch, his kisses and his love. It hurt at first since I was a virgin, but he made it better. Soon we were both climaxing. “Emma” he groaned her name as he came. As I drift into nothingness, I can’t help but think that something was wrong. He just wouldn’t confuse me with my sister right? “Fuck!” the familiar panicked voice wakes me up. I open my eyes and sit up in bed wondering what the hell was happening, and why Rowan was in my bedroom. I’m struck by horror when I see him pacing the room shirtless. It’s then I realize that I was naked. I scramble to get out of bed. Holding the sheets tightly to my chest. “No, no, no” I start chanting. Fear and panic gripping me. His eyes turn to me. They’re burning with rage and hatred. I try to think back to what happened. Things are a little blurry. What I thought was a damn dream was not. “What the fuck happened and what the hell are you doing in my hotel room?” Rowan asks me, anger lacing his voice. “I–I” the words refuse to leave my mouth.

Not only because I was a mess but also because I didn’t know what to explain things. How do I tell him that I had an app that tracks his movement when he’s in town? How do I explain that I never planned to sleep with him? I start picking up my clothes. My hands trembling. The fact that I was sore and winced with each step proved that last night wasn’t a dream. I had slept with my sister’s boyfriend. The guy she was in love with. The one she planned on having a future with. “I asked you a fucking question” he shouts, throwing a lamp against the wall. “I found you at a bar and we started drinking, that’s all I remember” I lie even though I remember bits and pieces. He was livid Guilt was written all over his face. Rowan loved Emma and because of nie he might. just lose her +15 BONUS “And you want me to believe that? You have been after me since I was twelve. I go out to drink and you’re just conveniently there?” he growls, firing those questions. I ignore him and put my clothes as best as I can without flashing him my bits. “You think I planned all this?” I asks motioning to the room and scattered clothes. “You’re not the only one who was drunk, Rowan” I insist. I might have gone there intentionally but I hadn’t planned on getting drunk and losing my virginty to him. He grips his hair so tightly I’m afraid he’ll rip chunks of it off. “What am I going to do? I thought I was making love to Emma” he cries. “She’ll never forgive me for this, she’ll hate. I love her so much and because of you I’m going to lose her” I feel hurt. Broken inside. Utterly shattred that he thought I was Emma. I don’t remember every single detail, but I thought it was special, and now he tells me that it wasn’t me he was making love to. I look at him and push away my pain. He looked liked he needed someone, so I walk to him and place my hand on his shoulder. Trying to give him comfort. Instead he reacts violently. He pushes me so forcefully that I fall. “Don’t fucking touch you bitch!” he roars, anger and bitterness radiating off him in waves. 1 I stand up, tears filling my eyes. “Rowan, I never planned on this happening” I can tell he’s already lost to me. “Just fucking leave… I never want to see your face ever again” he says sitting down on the bed, heartbroken. Tears swimming in his eyes. The look on his face breaks my heart. He looked torn, shattered. I wanted to help him but I knew he wouldn’t accept my help. So instead I leave. I wanted this to be a bad dream, but it wasn’t. I had messed up big time. Two days later ‘here is that fucking bitch?” I hear Emma scream from downstairs. y hearts pounds, almost breaking my chest. Deep down I knew that Rowan had told her the ath. She was now out to get blood. efore I can do hide like the coward I am, my bedroom door flies open and Emma walks in. She as crying, mascara was running down her face, a battle between anger and pain waging war in er eyes. don’t have time to react before she slaps me. Pain stings my cheek. I don’t stop her when she oes it again and again until I’m cowering and crying on the floor. This was my penance for what I ad done. Emma!” she was about to hit me again when father’s voice stops her. “What is the meaning of this, why are you hitting your sister?” I look to the door to find him and mother standing there in shock. They have never been my biggest fan, but now they’ll downright hate me when the truth comes out. Both mine and Rowan’s family were looking forward to the union of Rowan and Emma. Our mother’s couldn’t stop talking about it. Everyone in our families were beyond happy when they started dating. I ruined all that a few nights ago. “She’s no sister of mine!” she shrieks looking deranged. My mother sighs, looking at me emotionlessly, “What did she do this time? Did she dye your conditioner again?” “I wish…the stupid hoe seduced Rowan when he was drunk and slept with him” Emma’s hands were fisted as she answered, tears still pouring from her eyes I don’t know what Rowan told them but that wasn’t what happened. Our parents turn to me. Disgust written all over their faces. Father’s face soon turns angry and cold All of which are directed at me. I’m not surprised though, Emma was his princess while I was nothing. “I didn’t I was drunk too, I didn’t mean to sleep with him” I defend myself, my vice coming out lowly Lair” Emma screams before her heels connect with my abdomen. “Rowan would never sleep with you in his right frame of mind. He loves me and we all know you’ve been obsessed with him since. abort of rapes” I’m taken aback That she would suggest I raped him. Why wouldn’t she believe me when I said 1 was drunk? That I didn’t intentionally set out to hurt her. “Daddy, what am I going to do? She’s ruined everything. How can I look at Rowan the same knowing he slept with this shut” she crosses the room and gets into father’s arms. Father looks at me like I’m the scum of the earth. Like I wasn’t also his daughter. “I didn’t raise you to be slut, Ava. l’or what you’ve done to your sister, I’ll never forgive you” he says before walking away with a crying Emma. His words hurt but I push it away. It was also on the tip of my mouth to tell him that he never 1aised me at all, but I hold back “I hope you’re happy now…it’s sad that you would stoop so low just so you can steal a man that doesn’t belong to you. You disgust me Ava, I don’t know why god cursed me with you as a daughter” mother says before also leaving. I’m left on the floor crying. Feeling more alone than ever. Wishing that I could wake up from this terrible dream. Knowing that my life will never be the same. Evelyn M.M Author Hi my lovelies This chapter was a bit long so I had to split it into two parts. Anyway, I hope you enjoy them Please remember to leave a gem if you like it. Take care and stay safe.

Ex-Husbands Regret Chapter 35-The past (Part two) Two months later.

I stare at the pregnancy test in fear. Watching as slowly the line doubles indicating I was in deed pregnant.

Wanting it to be wrong, I take another but it shows the same thing. I was pregnant with Rowan’s baby.

Life these past few months have been hell. I became the pariah not only in both families, but also in school. Everybody knows what happened between me and Rowan, but nobody believes me when I tell them that I was drunk.

All the blame was placed on my shoulder because I was the slut that seduced my sister’s boyfriend when he was drunk.

In school I’m bullied and in town I’m shunned.

My mother and father rarely talk to me nowadays. Emma cut me off completely, saying I was dead to her. As for Travis, well it’s like I no longer exist in his eyes. I haven’t seen or talked to Rowan since that night.

My heart has broken over and over these past few weeks. With no reprieve for the constant pain.

and rejection. If I had thought life was bad before, it was now a hundred times worse.

I felt all alone and now I was pregnant. Would they ask me to abort the baby? I wouldn’t put it past them. They were still trying to get Rowan and Emma back together after Emma broke up with him.

Looking at my room, I make a quick decision. I couldn’t stay here anymore. It wasn’t healthy for me or my baby. I place my hand on the belly, promising to give him or her all the love that was novelbin denied to me.

Travis and Rowan were home so both families had gone out for brunch. Of course I wasn’t invited, they didn’t want me anywhere near Rowan. Hell, neither of them wanted to see my face. They all pretended like I didn’t exist.

I quickly start packing my things. I had some money saved up from my part time job. It would have to be enough for a new start. I could continue working until I was maybe eight just to get more money, since father had cut me off his will, so I had no trust fund.

Deciding to only take the essential, I start throwing things into my suitcase.

I was just about done when the door to my bedroom opened and my mother walked in. Shit, I didn’t think they’d be back so soon.

“What are you doing?” she asks looking at my suitcase. There was no emtion in her voice. It’s like she was speaking to a stranger.

“Isn’t it obvious? I’m leaving…no need staying in a place I’m hated” I answer as I turn around to zip my bag.

She says something but I don’t pay attention. I needed to leave as soon as possible. The further I got away from these people the better it will be.

“What the hell is this, Ava?” the tone of her voice makes me turn around.

I stand frozen when I see my pregnancy test in her hand. Fuck, how could I be so careless as to leave it on my vanity table?

“Nothing, it belongs to a friend” I try to play it off.

“You have no friends…god, is this why you’re running away? As if it wasn’t bad enough you ruined Rowan’s relationship with Emma and now you want to steal his baby?” she starts pacing the room.!

“How are you even sure it’s his? You all think I’m a slut, so the baby could be anyone’s” I stomp my foot in frustration as she looks at me with an unreadable expression.

I just wanted to leave. I wanted to get away from all of them. Was that too difficult?

“I won’t let you leave, not until we find out if the baby you’re carrying is indeed Rowan’s” Before I can do anything, she rushes out the door. A moment later I hear the door close and I realize that she had locked me in.

I wanted to scream in frustration but that wouldn’t help me. I needed to think of a way to leave. I look at my window and it was barred. They did that when they realized that I sneaked out through it that night I sit down and clear my head. There had to be a way out A few minutes, my phone starts ringing. see Rowan’s name flashing but I ignore it.

I guess mother had told him, why the hell else would he call the girl he believes took advantage of him in his drunken state.

There wasn’t any other way out except through the window. Taking a chair, I hit the glass and break it. I push the planks that had been used to bar it until they give way. I push my suitcase through the window and it falls over.

Like I said, I was in the furthest room of the house, so the commotion wouldn’t have alerted anyone. I slowly climb down, careful of the broken shards of glass. I release a sigh of relief when I get down.

Happy that I had managed to escape, I take my suitcase and start dragging it. My eyes on my phone as I order a cab. My happiness is short lived when I bump into someone. I lift my head and I recoil in horror when my eyes clash with the intense greys of Rowan.

“Were you seriously trying to run away with my baby?” he asks, a dangerous edge in his tone.

I throw my hands in the air. Releasing my suitcase in the process.

“I already told mother it’s not your baby” I lie, stepping back.

There was just no way I was going to allow my baby to be raised in such a toxic environment. One where everyone hates his or her mother.

“You dare lie to me” he snarls. “You were a fucking virgin. You may have foooled your mother, but I know that child is mine.” I’m momentarily taken a back that he would know I was a virgin. We were drunk, especially him.

“How did you know that?” I ask lowly.

“The sheets we slept in had spots of blood” 1 shrug off his answer. “It doesn’t matter. The baby could still be anyone’s. I might have slept with countless men afterwards.” His eyes narrow. There were raging storms behind them.

I pull my gaze away jusy as my cab arrives.

“I’m really sorry I messed up your relationship with Emma but I need to go. My life isn’t here anymore. I truly wish that things work out well between you two and that you end up getting back together.” I go to side step him but he grabs my hand and stops me, He takes some money from his pocket and hands it over to the driver, apologizing for the inconvenience.

“Rowan, let me go” I pull my hand but he still doesn’t let go.

“No, we are going to get married right now. The judge agreed to meet me at your parent’s” he says, tagging me towards the house.

“I’m not getting married to you!” I argue. Was he crazy? Why would he want to marry a woman he hates?

“Yes we are and that fucking final” the grip he had on my hand tightens.

Fear and panic starts rising inside me. This isn’t what I wanted “We don’t have to do this. Think about it, you can tell everyone the baby isn’t your, I’ll leave and never come back. No one will ever know and after sometime, Emma will take you back. You’ll destroy your chances with her if she finds out that not only am I having your baby but also that we got married” I cry, begging him to see reason. “Please let me go and you will never have to see me again. You’ll go on with your life like I didn’t exist” He pauses in his steps and I think I’ve gotten through to him.

“No!” he states firmly “I may hate you but I won’t allow my child to grow up without his or her father With that, he pulls me into the house, where the judge, Travis and my parents were waiting.

About thirty minutes later, we were legally married. Immediately after, Rowan storms out leaving me with my family. I couldn’t even call them that because they looked at me like I was the antichrist.

Soon after, I’m left alone. I place a hand on my belly and smile. Maybe this was a blessing in disguise, I lie to myself.

Right there and then I make a promise to my baby that he or she will be born into a loving family. I was going to make Rowan fall in love me, that way my baby won’t be raised in a broken home. I smiled after that promise not knowing that Rowan was going to break me in more ways than one

Ex-Husbands Regret Chapter 36-His remedy Present day.

L “So you see, they have a reason to hate me…I ruined their love” I mutter as tears fill my eyes.

It’s always painful for me to go down memory lane. I was naïve and foolish. Thinking that I could ake him love me after I literally ruined his life. Nine years later and I’m still paying the price for loving Rowan Woods.

“It wasn’t your fault?” Ethan asks me, his fingers slowly caressing mine.

“It was. I let my obsession with him take center stage and because of that I made the biggest mistake of my life” the tears fall freely now.

If only I could go back in time. If only I could change things. I’ve lived my life in regret. I wish I had listened to that nagging voice in my head. I wish I had payed attention to it instead of ignoring it. It would have saved me from so much heartache and pain.

Hell, I wish I had realized earlier that I was pregnant. I could have escaped earlier. I would have left and never told Rowan that I was pregnant with his child. No one would have been the wiser. I know it sounds downright evil but looking back now it would have saved Noah from seeing Rowan and I fight all the time.

I would have gone to a place where no one knew me. A place so far away from my family and Rowan. A place no one knew them. I’m sure they wouldn’t even have bothered looking for me and that would have just been fine with me.

“Ava?” “What?” I ask as a response. I had gotten lost in thought again.

“I said it wasn’t you fault. You were also drunk, so if they were blaming you, they should have blamed him too” he gives me a reassuring smile.

I look at him with round eyes.

“You believe me?” I ask him in surprise.

No one and I mean no one has ever believed that I was drunk. They all thought I was malicious and I took advantage of an innocent man.

“Of course I do, don’t you believe you’re also innocent?” his blue eyes seer into me. As if he was trying to unveil all my pain.

I sigh tiredly. “I got so tired of hearing that I was to blame. That I wasn’t drunk at all, that sometimes I believe that’s exactly what happened. Everyone has pounded it in me, cementing the novelbin idea that I took advantage of his drunken state that sometimes I doubt the events of my own memory” It’s sad really. That sometimes I think that my memory is faulty. I mean if everyone says I’m guilty isn’t that the truth?

There are other times I think that the pain I went through at Rowan’s hand was my punishment. That God was punishing me for wanting and sleeping with a man that didn’t belong to me. That’s also something everyone has told me. That my pain was my punishment.

You get used to people’s words when the keep forcing their truth and beliefs down your throat. That’s what happened with me. Soon after I started believing them. Believing that I was a fault. Believing that I was at fault. 1 My heart aches when I think of everything they put me through, Rowan especially. That a man you love could destroy you leaves you wondering if there’s truly any good in the world.

The only good thing that came out of that mistake is Noah. I would never regret my son. He was the one that saved. He was anchor during the times when I wanted to end it all. During the times when I felt so alone I contemplated suicide.

It was after he was born. I was so tired of the constant pain, the constant hate that I thought of it. I knew that Rowan would take good care of him. He fell in love with Noah the moment he was placed in his arms.

I pulled myself from that darkness when I realized what leaving Noah would mean. I didn’t want him to think I was weak. Most especially I didn’t want Emma as his step mother. I knew Rowan would get back together with her and I was afraid she would transfer her hate for me to him.

Now, looking at the vile words she spewed at me concerning Noah, I’m glad that I had chosen to stay strong I wasn’t going to let her hurt him.

“You’re not to blame, Never. You were both drunk so no one was to blame. You parents should have been ashamed for placing the entire blame on an eighteen year old girl. Rowan should have taken responsibility for his actions instead of allowing all the blame to fall on you. He was twenty “But I’m the one that sought him out” +15 BONUS “Doesn’t matter. He gave you alcohol knowing that you weren’t supposed to be drinking” he pulls his hand from mine and runs it through his hair. “The more I know about Rowan and your family, the more I dislike them” he says more to himself than me.

I don’t say anything. After all, I was beginning to hate them to.

“Come on” he says then helps me stand up.

“Where are we going?” I ask him.

I wanted to stay a little bit longer. I didn’t want to go to an empty house.

“I’m taking you home…I don’t like seeing you trying to drown your sorrows” he answers.

He doesn’t give me time to say anything before he’s pulling me across the dance floor and out of the bar. I shiver from the chill. He removes his leather jacket and gets me into it.

He helps me get into his car and then he begins to drive. We don’t talk, but the silence between us isn’t awkward.

The way home I think about everything and nothing. Sure, Ethan helped remind me that it wasn’t my fault, but the guilt of ruining three lives is still there.

Sooner that I would like, we pull into my drive way. Ethan switches off the engine and like the gentle man he is, helps me down.

I pull my keys from my bag and open my door.

“Do you want to come in?” I ask him. “I’m not planning for the night to end, I’m still not drunk enough to forget my pain” “You plan to continue drinking just to forget?” he asks and I nod my head.

I just needed reprieve even if it was for a few hours.

He looks at me and I see the moment his eyes change. The moment he makes a decision and heat fills his eyes.

“If that’s the case, then I have a better remedy” Ethan says, his voice getting deeper.

He crosses the threshold of my home and closes the door. The moment he does, he seals my mouth with his and then for the next few hours he goes to show me just how better his remedy is

Ex-Husbands Regret Chapter 37-Having a breakdown The warm light on my faces wakes me up. At first I’m confused as to how I ended up in my room, but then the heavy hand around my waist brings the memories of what happened back.

I start to internally panic so much so that I’m afraid I’ll wake Ethan up. I didn’t want him up now. Not when I was having a nervous breakdown. Not while my head was a mess. As slowly as I can, I get up and leave the bed.

He turns and murmurs something in his sleep, but he doesn’t wake up. I heave a sigh of relief even as I put some clothes on and pick up my phone from the dresser.

Tip toing to the door, I wince a little when I open it and it creeks. I look back, my heart in my mouth. I’m immediately thankful when I see Ethan still in bed.

The sheets were down to his waist, exposing his very well defined abs and an arm was thrown over his face. Swallowing loudly, I leave the room.

I walk down my stairs feeling like I was doing the walk of shame even though I was in my own house. The soreness between my legs, a testament of how Ethan took his job at remedying my pain seriously.

The moment I get the kitchen I let loose. All the panic and anxiety I tried stifling in my room rushes through me like an Avalanche.

“Call down, people have sex all the time” I try telling myself but instead of calming down it only increases the pace of my wildly beating heart.

I start pacing the tiled floors. Still unable to believe that I had sex with another man. I always thought that the only man who would ever touch me or see me naked is Rowan. Here we are though, not only did I let Ethan kiss me, but I also allowed him into my bed.

Tired of pacing, I sit on the kitchen stool. My feet tapping nervously on the floor. What am I supposed to do now? How am I supposed to act? I didn’t know what the protocol after these type of things happened is.

Am I supposed to make him breakfast? Would he even want breakfast? Is it something that will happen again or is it a one nightstand?

I place a hand on my beating heart. I felt like my chest was going to explode. I’ve never done something like this before. Even if I hadn’t been in love with Rowan, I always believed that I would currently not strong.

“You don’t have to love someone to have sex with them…you just have to be attracted to them” A voice whispers.

I want to argue with it but my phone vibrating stops me. I unlock it.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY.

I read the simple message, wondering who could have sent it. That is until I lift my eyes and see it’s from Rowan. I’m shocked and then angry. 4 He has no right at all to send me that stupid message. Not when he has never wished me a happy birthday during our marriage and especially not after the disgusting things he said to me.

I stand up and go back to pacing. I mean why now? Why now when we are divorced? Why today of all day? A few hours after I have slept with another man.

I don’t think it’s fair to compare two men sexually, but Ethan thoroughly fucked me. Simple and clear. There was passion and heat, something that lacked with Rowan Ethan took me in positions I didn’t even know were possible. I loved that but I also hated it because it proved how stale my sex life with Rowan was.

The only time Rowan ever took me like that was the first time we had sex and it was only because he thought he was sleeping with Emma, the love of his fucking life.

I always wanted it to be like that between us. Always thought that something was missing. It wasn’t bad, but I just wanted more.

Now after my night with Ethan I realize what has been missing between Rowan and I was the passion. I also realize that it had been missing because I wasn’t who he had wanted I push the pain that tries to resurface away. I didn’t want to think that Rowan was holding back even when we were having sex simply because he’d wanted another woman instead.

I go back to my phone. Just to distract myself from the turmoil of what was happening inside me.

I find more text wishing me a happy birthday. They were from Travis, Letty, mother and even Gabe lignore the rest and make a mental note to reply to Letty’s later.

I just didn’t understand. Why now? What did they wish to gain from it?

“Your forgiveness?” the same voice whispers.

Forgiveness. Such a simple word yet so complicated.

How can I give them that when they didn’t give it to me? How can I forgive them when they broke me? How am I supposed to let it all go when they didn’t let me live in peace for what happened?

Ethan was right. Both Rowan and I were drunk but I’m the only one who got punished. The only one who got blamed was me. I was the one that was called names, the one that was looked down on. The only one who got bullied.

I am the only one that got the emotional and verbal abuses. I took all of it. I took the blame even though I shouldn’t have because I loved Rowan The more I thought about it, the more I got angry. I can feel the angry tears trying to fall and this time I don’t want to push them back.

I’m so tired. So fucking tired of being the bigger person. I lost just as much as Rowan did because of that night.

No one wanted to see how the guilt broke. No one wanted to see how I was breaking or how I struggled. It was always about Rowan and Emma It was always about him. How come I had to break just to keep us working? How come I had to break for them to feel good about themselves? They broke me and yet no one wants to acknowledge that. No one wants to acknowledge my pain.

I feel a dam explode inside me. All the pain that I have been holding back. All the pain I’ve been pushing down I can’t contain it anymore. It all comes rushing to the surface as my world unravels The guttural scream that leaves my mouth is animalistic even to my own ears. It reverberates off the walls, echoing my torment. I lash out, my fist colliding with any fragile object around me The sound of shattering glass and splintering wood fills the air Mirroring the chaos within my soul. My fragile heart was breaking all over again. The pain swallowing me. Destroying me from the inside out.

With each passing moment, the anguish that had been buried deep continues to surface up. Clawing its way out from deep inside me.

I hate them I hate Rowan for what he put me through “Aya” I turn at his voice.

Ethan stands there shirtless He looks at me in shock. The kitchen was destroyed, including the barstools.

Seeing him there, I fall down on my knees in surrender, not caring if I hurt myself on the shattered glass. What’s physical pain compared to an emotional one?

“I hate him. I gave him my all. He took and took and I continued to let him. He left me with nothing Ethan. I’m empty, so dark and cold. How do I live like that? How do I let go. I’m so tired of fighting, all these weights I’m carrying are getting heavy” I cry.

Why didn’t I see that I was trying to hold on to something that wasn’t supposed to stand? That I was living in a waste land that they banished me to?

I feel his hands around me. “Let it all go, let the pain go, Ava. It’s the only way” he says and I do exactly that.

My nails dig into his flesh as I cry my heart out and I transfer all that pain to him. He doesn’t complain. He doesn’t say a word. He doesn’t wince.

He continues to hold me as the remnants of my past, my unhealed scars, lay scattered on the floor A physical manifestation of the emotional turmoil that had finally consumed me.

My inner demons tear me apart as I breakdown and all the pain I have endured finally erupts I finally sink against him. Completely and utterly drained. He gently picks me up bridal style and leads me up the stairs. My eyes were beginning to close as I feel a certain peace settle deep inside me Even if God had deemed me guilty of my past sins, I think I’ve already paid enough for those mistakes. It was time to leave the past where it belonged. It was time to heal I was done hiding. It was time to come out of the shadows and live my life.

Having a breakdownThe warm light on my faces wakes me up. At first I’m confused as to how I ended up in my room, but then the heavy hand around my waist brings the memories of what happened back.

I start to internally panic so much so that I’m afraid I’ll wake Ethan up. I didn’t want him up now. Not when I was having a nervous breakdown. Not while my head was a mess. As slowly as I can, I get up and leave the bed.

He turns and murmurs something in his sleep, but he doesn’t wake up. I heave a sigh of relief even as I put some clothes on and pick up my phone from the dresser.

Tip toing to the door, I wince a little when I open it and it creeks. I look back, my heart in my mouth. I’m immediately thankful when I see Ethan still in bed.

The sheets were down to his waist, exposing his very well defined abs and an arm was thrown over his face. Swallowing loudly, I leave the room.

I walk down my stairs feeling like I was doing the walk of shame even though I was in my own. house. The soreness between my legs, a testament of how Ethan took his job at remedying my pain seriously.

The moment I get the kitchen I let loose. All the panic and anxiety I tried stifling in my room rushes through me like an Avalanche.

“Call down, people have sex all the time” I try telling myself but instead of calming down it only increases the pace of my wildly beating heart.

I start pacing the tiled floors. Still unable to believe that I had sex with another man. I always thought that the only man who would ever touch me or see me naked is Rowan Here we are though, not only did I let Ethan kiss me, but I also allowed him into my bed.

Tired of pacing, I sit on the kitchen stool. My feet tapping nervously on the floor. What am 1 supposed to do now? How am I supposed to act? I didn’t know what the protocol after these type of things happened is.

Am I supposed to make him breakfast? Would he even want breakfast? Is it something that will happen again or is it a one nightstand?

I place a hand on my beating heart. I felt like my chest was going to explode. I’ve never done something like this before. Even if I hadn’t been in love with Rowan, I always believed that I would currently not strong.

“You don’t have to love someone to have sex with them…you just have to be attracted to them” A voice whispers.

I want to argue with it but my phone vibrating stops me. I unlock it.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY.

I read the simple message, wondering who could have sent it. That is until I lift my eyes and see it’s from Rowan. I’m shocked and then angry.

He has no right at all to send me that stupid message. Not when he has never wished me a happy birthday during our marriage and especially not after the disgusting things he said to me.

I stand up and go back to pacing. I mean why now? Why now when we are divorced? Why today of all day? A few hours after I have slept with another man.

I don’t think it’s fair to compare two men sexually, but Ethan thoroughly fucked me. Simple and clear. There was passion and heat, something that lacked with Rowan. Ethan took me in positions I didn’t even know were possible. I loved that but I also hated it because it proved how stale my sex life with Rowan was.

The only time Rowan ever took me like that was the first time we had sex and it was only because he thought he was sleeping with Emma, the love of his fucking life.

I always wanted it to be like that between us. Always thought that something was missing. It wasn’t bad, but I just wanted more.

Now after my night with Ethan I realize what has been missing between Rowan and I was the passion. I also realize that it had been missing because I wasn’t who he had wanted.

I push the pain that tries to resurface away. I didn’t want to think that Rowan was holding back even when we were having sex simply because he’d wanted another woman instead.

I go back to my phone. Just to distract myself from the turmoil of what was happening inside me.

I find more text wishing me a happy birthday. They were from Travis, Letty, mother and even Gabe I ignore the rest and make a mental note to reply to Letty’s later.

I just didn’t understand. Why now? What did they wish to gain from it?

“Your forgiveness?” the same voice whispers.

Forgiveness. Such a simple word yet so complicated.

How can I give them that when they didn’t give it to me? How can I forgive them when they broke me? How am I supposed to let it all go when they didn’t let me live in peace for what happened?

Ethan was right. Both Rowan and I were drunk but I’m the only one who got punished. The only one who got blamed was me. I was the one that was called names, the one that was looked down on. The only one who got bullied. 3 I am the only one that got the emotional and verbal abuses. I took all of it. I took the blame even though I shouldn’t have because I loved Rowan.

The more I thought about it, the more I got angry. I can feel the angry tears trying to fall and this time I don’t want to push them back.

I’m so tired. So fucking tired of being the bigger person. I lost just as much as Rowan did because of that night.

No one wanted to see how the guilt broke. No one wanted to see how I was breaking or how I struggled. It was always about Rowan and Emma.

It was always about him. How come I had to break just to keep us working? How come I had to break for them to feel good about themselves? They broke me and yet no one wants to acknowledge that. No one wants to acknowledge my pain.

I feel a dam explode inside me. All the pain that I have been holding back. All the pain I’ve been pushing down. I can’t contain it anymore. It all comes rushing to the surface as my world unravels.

The guttural scream that leaves my mouth is animalistic even to my own ears. It reverberates off the walls, echoing my torment. I lash out, my fist colliding with any fragile object around me The sound of shattering glass and splintering wood fills the air. Mirroring the chaos within my soul. My fragile heart was breaking all over again. The pain swallowing me. Destroying me from the inside out.

With each passing moment, the anguish that had been buried deep continues to surface up. Clawing its way out from deep inside me.

I hate them. I hate Rowan for what he put me through.

“Ava” I tum at his voice.

Ethan stands there shirtless. He looks at me in shock. The kitchen was destroyed, including the barstools.

Seeing him there, I fall down on my knees in surrender, not caring if I hurt myself on the shattered glass. What’s physical pain compared to an emotional one?

“I hate him. I gave him my all. He took and took and I continued to let him. He left me with nothing Ethan. I’m empty, so dark and cold. How do I live like that? How do I let go. I’m so tired of fighting, all these weights I’m carrying are getting heavy” I cry.

Why didn’t I see that I was trying to hold on to something that wasn’t supposed to stand? That I ⚫ was living in a waste land that they banished me to?

I feel his hands around me. “Let it all go, let the pain go, Ava. It’s the only way” he says and I do exactly that.

My nails dig into his flesh as I cry my heart out and I transfer all that pain to him. He doesn’t complain. He doesn’t say a word. He doesn’t wince.

He continues to hold me as the remnants of my past, my unhealed scars, lay scattered on the floor. A physical manifestation of the emotional turmoil that had finally consumed me.

My inner demons tear me apart as I breakdown and all the pain I have endured finally erupts.

I finally sink against him. Completely and utterly drained. He gently picks me up bridal style and leads me up the stairs. My eyes were beginning to close as I feel a certain peace settle deep inside me. Even if God had deemed me guilty of my past sins, I think I’ve already paid enough for those mistakes. It was time to leave the past where it belonged. It was time to heal.

I was done hiding. It was time to come out of the shadows and live my life.

Ex-Husbands Regret Chapter 38-A banquet Rowan I was getting ready for a banquet. It wasn’t something I wanted to do but I had to go. none the less The founder of Hope foundation was holding the banquet in thanks giving and honor of all its donors. Given I was one of its many donors, I was invited “What is it, Brian. I’m busy?” I answer after checking the caller ID “We were able to get a DNA match from the blood sample we collected from Miss Sharp’s house” he goes straight to the point.

Her name makes me take a sharp intake of air. The last words I flung at her still echo in fucking mind I shouldn’t have said all those hurtful things but I was so fucking pissed that she put her hands on Emma “And?” I urge, wanting him to continue.

I was hoping this was good news. I wanted nothing more than to solve Ava’s case and put it behind us “I don’t have good news” he replies making me grown.

“What happened?” “We identified the man. He goes by Black Serpent. He’s been on our radar for quite a while since he is a hired killer Someone tipped us as to where he’s hiding, only problem is that we found him dead with a bullet in his skull” there was an edge in his voice. An edge I was also feeling.

He was our hope but now the man was dead, so we were back to square one.

“Did you find anything that might have given a clue on why he was after Ava?” I ask almost desperately.

“Nothing” he replies.

“And the one that tipped you?

He sighs tiredly. “I think it might have been the one that killed him. My guess is he or she found out that we had evidence against Black Serpent so he killed him before we could make an arrest and get him to reveal who his boss is +15 BONUS The picture he painted started forming in my head. The pieces falling into place. I didnt fucking like the direction this was leading to.

“But that would mean that whoever is after Ava is someone close to her, otherwise how would they have known about the DNA sample?” Despite the news of Ava’s attack leaking, nothing much was said. Tabloids only reported that she was attacked in her house. There was no public information concerning the blood sample the police collected.

“Most likely. That or they have an accomplice who is close to Ava and therefore feeding him or her information” Brian finishes.

Just when I thought things would get better then this happens. How the fuck are we supposed to catch this guy?

“Is that all?” I ask him.

“Yes…for now” “Keep me updated” with that I hang up and get back to tying my tie.

Now more than ever I didn’t feel like going to the damn banquet.

I finish and head downstairs where my limousine was waiting. I was supposed to pick Emma up since she was my date for this dinner. I get in and my driver drives the short distance to Emma’s apartment.

I find her ready when I ring the bell to her apartment. She looked beautiful, but for some reason I couldn’t appreciate her beauty as much as I did when we were younger.

“You’re quiet” she tells me.

She was seated across from me, looking elegant and poised. I stare at her, not really knowing what the hell I was looking for in her blue eyes.

“I just have a lot on my mind” I answer.

“Care to share?” Not really How could I tell her that the thoughts that were plaguing me were mostly of her sister?

+15 BONUS Her mouth thins. She isn’t happy that I turned her down, but she doesn’t say it. Instead she keeps quiet and stares out the window.

I sigh. The atmosphere was now fucking awkward. I don’t do awkward so I start drumming a finger on my thigh. Praying that this fucking trip would end already.

We get there in time and I let out a breath of relief. The car stops and I get out, then I help Emma get out. The cameras begin flashing the minute we step onto the red carpert.

‘Mr. Woods, is it true that you’re now with Emma Sharp, your ex–wife’s sister?‘ one reporter asks ‘Some say that Miss Emma is the love of your life while circumstances forced you to be with Ava sharp‘ another flings.

‘Where is your ex–wife, Mr. Woods?” ‘Miss Emma, how does it feel to be with a man that was once married to your sister? They even have a son together” I feel Emma’s grip tightening on my forearm when they ask her that question. I lead her away as they throw question after question at us. Finally we get to the entrance and are welcomed in.

The organizer did a wonderful job. I wasn’t into this kind of shit but the place looked amazing. We are led to our table. We find Gabe, Travis, Letty and Christine already seated.

I don’t bother greeting anyone unlike Emma. I just help Emma into her seat then I take my own My mind wasn’t here. My thoughts revolved around Ava and her safety. I couldn’t even focus on the conversation around the table, that’s until her name is mentioned.

“What the fuck is Ava doing here?” I look up to find Emma staring daggers behind me.

I turn in that direction to find Ava standing with Ethan. She looked like a fucking goddess with her long curled brown hair, and a gold glittering dress. I’ve never seen her like this. She looked absolutely breath taking. As much as I tried I couldn’t take my eyes off her.

She walks forward and Ethan walks by her side. His palm on the exposed flesh of her lower back. She passes by our table. A part from Letty, who she smiles and waves at, she ignores the rest of us.

Ethan leads her to the table a few feet from ours and pulls out her chair for her. She gives him such a radiant smile that I feel it deep inside my soul even though it wasn’t directed at me.

I pull my gaze from them when Ethan leans in and kisses her cheek. Everything inside me turned +15 BONUS myself from matching to their table and claiming her.

I shake those away. What the fuck? She wasn’t mine, so what the hell was happening to me?

“The cop probably invited her, Rowan did some digging and found out that he is from a wealthy family up north. His presence makes sense, as for Ava we all know she isn’t the kind of person to be invited to such fancy things” the snide remarks pulls me from my anger I turn to look at Christine just as she and Emma burst out laughing.

Why the hell have I never heard her say such things before now? Had I been that blind and stupid?

Letty snorts. “We also know that you wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for your association to Rowan.

Same with you Emma, you only got invited because of Rowan despite you family’s name, so why don’t you shut your fucking mouth and stop acting like you’re the queens here” s “Letty…” Travis growls.

“No! Christine is here bad mouthing Ava because just like Emma, she’s jealous of her. Tell me Christine what are you except for a highly paid secretary? What connections do you have? None!

You were nothing before Rowan hired you, just a cheap slut that made her way to the top by sleeping with her former bosses” Letty then turns to Emma “And you? When are you going to grow the fuck up? Nine fucking years and you’re still a bitter spoilt brat. Ava made a mistake, get over it and stop acting like the world ended. The sun doesn’t revolve around you so instead of trying your hardest to put your sister down why don’t you focus on your relationship with Rowan which by the looks of things, isn’t even working” Both Emma and Christine stare at her in shock and anger. Probably because no one had ever dared to talk to them like that. Emma had her hand fisted. Angry waves rolling off her.

“That’s enough, Letty…I won’t tolerate you talking to Emma like that, she’s my sister. If you can’t respect her then leave” Travis growls at her. Letty just looks at Emma before sneering then turning to Travis.

“In case you forgot, Ava is your sister but that doesn’t matter to you does it? After all you’re among the very people that put her down and treated her like shit” she then stands up. “I’ll gladly leave, I’d rather stay at home than spend the night with a bunch of self–absorbed assholes: You all sicken me “Letty “Travis pleads his tune changing quickly, but she’s already turned around and leaving +15 BONUS The table remains silent as we watch her leave. She doesn’t get far though. She’s stopped by a body guard. He then directs her back to the banquet room and straight past us. She’s taken to Ava’s table.

Ava stands up and hugs her. They then take their seats and begin chatting.

Seconds later the bodyguards stands at our table.

“Mam, I’m gonna have to ask you to leave” he tells Christine.

“What?!” she almost screams.

“Please stand up and leave. I don’t want to embarrass you by dragging you out” “What did I do?” “I don’t know and I don’t care, I’m just following my orders, please don’t make things difficult” Christine was about to protest but I give her a sharp look. She shuts her mouth and stands up. All eyes are on her as the bodyguard escorts her out.

This room is full of the cream del a cream of the society and they all bare witness as she’s escorted out. The bodyguard didn’t want to embarrass her but the damage was already done. The fact that she was asked to leave was shameful to her.

“What the hell just happened?” Gabe asks as he stares around the room. 2 None of us had an answer. We continue staring at each other trying to figure out why the fuck Christine was asked to leave and why Letty was taken to Ava’s table.

“Good afternoon” the sound of someone at the podium speaking makes all our eyes turn to the front.

The woman at the front was a blonde lady. She had on a black dress and she was smiling at her audience.

“My name is Mary and I would like to take this opportunity to thank you all for coming today. As you know this banquet is in honor of all of you. Before we begin the festivities and celebrations, I would like to invite the founder of hope foundation to give a speech..” she’s interrupted the excited murmurs that fill the room, No one knew who the founder of Hope foundation was. His or her identity has been a secret for years, so of course everyone is fucking excited to finally meet the founder of the largest novelbin +15 BONUS I was curious, always have been as to why he or she would keep their identity hidden.

She waits until everyone is quiet before she continues.

“I know that you’re all very excited, so with no further ado, help me welcome the founder of Hope Foundation…” She pauses. She has all of us at the edge of our seats “Miss Ava Sharp”

Ex-Husbands Regret Chapter 39-Underneath the surface “What?” Emma whispers besides me in shock The whole room is quiet. Everyone is completely surprised. No one saw this coming. No one imagined that Ava would be the founder of such a large organization.

Hell, I was married to the woman and I had no clue That leaves a lot to be fucking said about me if I didn’t know this about Ava ‘Did you know this?” Gabe asks, eyes and mouth wide.

“No” I growl pissed that I had missed such a thing.

I watch as she pushes back her chair She stands up and Ethan stands up with her while offering her his hand with a smile she places her hand on his and he walks her towards the stage. I clench my jaw when he places his hand on her exposed back when he helps her up the stairs.

Once she’s there, he steps down. She gives Mary a hug before she steps up to the podium She smiles before clearing her throat “Hi” she chuckles nervously “For some reason it’s easier for me to address a room full of rowdy teenagers than a room full of adults” This earns her a couple of smiles and laughs from people.

I don’t think there is anyone here who doesn’t know me and it there is, my name is Ava Sharp Like Mary said, the reason we are here today is to celebrate all of you for your continued help in Hope Foundation Being a teacher, you see a lot of things at school Kids with bruises inflicted by abusive patents, kids going hungry because they don’t have lunch money, kids with tattered clothes and shoes because their parents are so poor that even coming to school is a luxury and kids who are homeless and live on the streets” she says, hei voice captivating her audience i have never seen the elites pay this much attention to a speech before Seeing those children go through such hardships broke my heart, so I started helping the best way i could fetarted with one boy in my class, then another, and another Behere kurmit I hat mote dono dozen children t was helping That’s where I got the idea to build a foundation wanted a safe haven for thein A place where they did have to worry about worth the t being Rids I started with buiding The Hope House and God blessed me by bring in sare

“Since we began four years ago, we have expanded The Hope Houses and we are proud to say that we have a house in every major city in the country. We have helped thousands of kids get into universities. We even have some in prestigious ones such as Harvard and Princeton. We have thousands of more under our care all ranging from a few months old to eighteen. We make sure that they don’t lack for anything and we even give the older ones allowance” She pauses before pointing to the tables at the center which were full of kids ranging from all ages.

“This foundation is to help them. To give them hope for a better future. To give them hope that it doesn’t matter where they came from, they can still make it. To back them up as they make their way through life. So from the bottom of my heart I want to say thank you for the continued support and for every single donation. I pray for more blessings upon you” she finishes and steps away from the podium.

Claps ring from every corner of the room as people stand up to appreciate her. They continue to clap until she steps down from the stage.

Mary soon after takes the podium. “That’s all for today, please have a wonderful evening and enjoy yourselves” I watch Ava completely mesmerized. Who would have thought that there was so much more underneath her surface?

“Damn, never in my wildest dream did I imagine that she was the founder of the largest children’s organization” Travis mutters, his eyes darting between Ava and Letty.

Letty was still seated at their table, but Ava was talking to some kids who had been waiting for her. One of them was a young man and he looked quite familiar.

“I know right?” Gabe adds, the shocked look still plastered on his face.

It was still hard to grasp. It was like she had this whole secret life that I never knew about. I never miss a thing, yet I completely missed this whole life Ava had.

Someone drops on the seat that Christine had exited. I turn to glare at them only to find Mary seated.

“Don’t mind me, I’m just exhausted, you’re Ava’s family right?” she asks and Travis numbly nods his head.

“Perfect” She doesn’t say anything else, just picks up her tablet and begins typing something on it “Hey” Emma begins. “Isn’t that Caleb Kingstone of Kingstone technologies? What’s he doing with Ava? Does he know her?” I look at where her gaze was directed. It was on the young man with Ava. No wonder he looked so familiar Kingstone technologies started about two years back. He is the youngest CEO and already has made a name for himself in the business world. At only twenty, he was already a success story. His techs were increasingly popular and he had earned himself a spot at the big boys table.

If I was vain, I would have been worried about him taking my number one spot as the top entrepreneur in the country. The boy was giving a lot of the other business men a run for their money.

“Oh yes….he is a beneficiary of the Hope Foundation. He’s an orphan and Ava took him under her wings. She’s the one who noted that he’s a tech genius. She encouraged him to start something with his talent. When he came up with the idea of having his own company, Ava backed him up. She gave him the startup capital he needed. No one believed in him back then, except for Ava. Now his company is fast growing and it’s earning him millions. As a thank you to Ava, he gave her shares in Kingstone technologies. Ava is the second largest share holder after him” Another shocking revelation. We stare at her. Each of us trying to absorb what she just told us.

Emma interrupts the moment by snorting. “So in other words you’re saying she’s taking advantage of the kids under her care to make herself rich?” This time I’ve had enough of her.

“Will you stop with the fucking snide remarks” I growl, hitting the table in anger.

People turn to us but mind their business when I glare at them. Emma looks at me like she’s never seen me before, but I was just so fucking sick and tired of her venomous mouth.

“Which hole have you been living?” Mary asks Emma in a sneer. “Ava doesn’t need anyone to make ber rich, the woman was a millionaire.” “What are you talking about?” Travis asks.

Mary shrugs her shoulder. “She was rich way before she even started this foundation. It’s only that she likes to keep her things private and away from prying eyes, but I’ve calculated her assets and the woman is fucking rich. If she was to be in the ranking of the richest women in the city, I do the math in my head. That would place her around the number five or six spot of the richest people in the whole country. I’m still reeling from that shock when Mary speaks again.

“The thing I love about Ava is how down to earth she is. She’s so rich yet so simple. She doesn’t dress in expensive brands, drive expensive cars or live in a huge expensive house. Looking at her you would snub her. You would look down on her and write her off” Fuck and isn’t that what we have done countless of times. What I have done countless of times.

Even when I bought her that range rover, I looked down on the car she chose because I thought she couldn’t afford the latest one.

No wonder she turned the fucking range rover down. I made a fool of myself that day. Not only that day but also on the day I told her to take the divorce alimony because I thought she would suffer now that I wasn’t providing for her.

“What you’re saying is impossible” Emma whispers.

Among all of us, she’s the one that has looked down Ava more. That much I can fucking tell. Now the truth was hitting her and she didn’t like that Ava was wealthier than her.

“I’m telling the truth…seriously, shouldn’t you all know this about boss lady given you’re her family?” Mary asks frowning.

We all look down in shame. She’s right, she was family and yet we excluded her and treated her like shit. No wonder she never told any of us of her status.

We were drowning in our shame when a commotion caught my attention.

Ava was standing head to head with Brenda. She was a socialite and an influential one. She was the self–appointed head of the women in our social rank.

Ex-Husbands Regret Chapter 40-Avenging angel “How dare you?” the anger in Ava’s voice was palpable.

Brenda sneers as if she had more important things to do. “It’s not my fault that the she can’t look where she’s going. This is a limited edition Luis Vuitton dress and the brat almost ruined it by splashing juice on it” Brenda and Ava have never gotten along. I knew she was bullied at school and that Brenda was her biggest tormentor.

The girl I they were talking about was cowaring behind Ava. She couldn’t have been more than five years old. She was cute, with a pretty pink dress, a heart shaped face, round lips and long black hair cascading down her back.

I can imagine having a little girl with my grey eyes and Ava’s shinny brown hair.

I freeze in my seat. What the hell? Where the fuck did that thought come from? Shaking my head.

and banishing those thoughts, I focus on Ava. Looks like Ava was finally putting her in her place.

“Are you kidding me? That’s a really stupid reason to hurt a child especially given we’re here because of them” Ava admonishes, a frown marring her beautiful face.

“It’s not a stupid reason” Brenda stomps her foot like a petulant child. “I’m not going to allow an orphan child who doesn’t know the meaning of what it is to be rich ruin a dress that costs more than she’ll ever see in her life” Shocked gasps fill the room. Brenda turns and realizes that she had an audience and that they aren’t happy with her. novelbin “That’s not what I meant…” she rushes to save face after noticing the angry gazes that were directed at her.

“You know what? Leave. Given your attitude towards these children, I don’t see the need for your presence here” Ava says then motions for one of the many bodyguards stationed around the entrances “What? You’re kicking me out?” Brenda stammers.

Ava just rolls her eyes, “Obviously” “You can’t do that, I’ve donated lots of money to this stupid foundation, you can’t just kick me out Ava smiles. A wicked smile. She then calls for Mary who rushes to her.

*Check how much she’s donated to the foundation” she instructs and Mary begins tapping on her tablet.

“One million dollars” Mary answers after a while.

Ava turns to Brenda, looking at her coolly. “You see, what we don’t need in this foundation is someone like you. Someone arrogant enough to think that we can’t do without their money.” She then turns back to Mary. “Transfer the exact amount back to her account” Everyone watches in surprise. No one says anything and no one moves.

“It’s done boss” Mary says smiling.

“Now that you have your money back, get the hell out of my banquet and from now on you are banned from any event I or my foundation hosts” There was steel in her voice, a tone I have never heard Ava use.

Brenda starts cursing at Ava and the foundation. Ava nods at the bodyguard and he drags her out kicking and scream. After she’s out, Ava turns to the room.

Just like with Christine, this was going to affect Brenda’s social standing alot. This was the best fucking revenge Ava could take on her.

“Anyone else share in the same opinion as Brenda? Like I said, we are here because of these kids and I’ll go through anyone who thinks they can mistreat them” her voice rings across the room, steady and strong even without a microphone.

Right then she looked like a damn avenging angel. Ready to strike down anyone who even so much as looks at the children wrong When no one says anything, she smiles. “Well then, sorry for the interruption and I do hope you have a lovely time” My eyes zone in on her as she turs around and walks away. She disappears outside, to the balcony Emma says something to me but I ignore her. My eyes fully focused on my ex–wife.

I stand up and push my chair back, then leave. Emma calls my name but I don’t turn back. I take long strides in Ava’s direction, Soon I’m outside the room.

She stands at the balcony. Her face facing the now darkening sky, her hair blowing in the wind Now, that I was here I didn’t know what to fucking say. I haven’t spoken to Ava since that day at her house. All my text and calls for the past two weeks have gone answered.

I step forward. My steps probably alerted her because she turns slightly. When she sees it’s just me, she tenses.

“What do you want Rowan?” she asks in a sigh.

I step further forward until I’m standing beside her.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” I was puzzled. She was my wife and she never said a thing.

“Tell you what?” “Everything… The Hope Foundation and the fact that you aren’t hurting for money. Why did you let all of us look down on you?” She snorts before turning to fully face me. “And when was I supposed to tell you? You barely wanted to be around me and you would even go to great lengths to make sure we aren’t together for long.” I stare at her. Looking deep in her brown eyes. There was something new in them. Something that wasn’t there before. There was also something missing.

She continues as she looks outside towards the garden. “Besides would you even have been interested? As far as I can remember, you didn’t particularly care about anything that concerned me” My eyes drift as I watch people walking in and outside of the garden. She was right. I had been a cold bastard. I rationalized at that time that I didn’t need to care about what the woman who had destroyed my life was doing.

I resented Ava and it showed in the way I fucking treated her for years. I always prided myself in being a good person, but looking back I have to admit that I had been prick. So much so that my wife kept a whole part of her life a secret to me.

“About Emma…” I go to apologize for the words I carelessly threw at her but she cuts me off.

“Don’t worry about it, I’m not after you Rowan and I don’t plan to come between you and Emma, you can rest assured that all the love I had for you is dead. You managed to kill it She takes a steadying breath “Loving you was the biggest mistake I have ever made and I don’t plan on continuing with that mistake” Fuck, why the hell did it feel like someone took a fucking sledge hammer to my heard at those words?!

“I will always be thankful because you gave me Noah. He’s the only good thing you’ve given me since I’ve known you. I regret falling in love with you but I will never regret our son.” She turns around and faces the door to the room. She smiles and I swivel around to look at what she’s staring at. Her eyes were on Ethan.

“I’m sorry for the trouble I caused you” she says her eyes still on the fucking bastard. “I’m sorry that my mistake tore you from Emma, I know no one believes me especially you, but I was drunk that night. Anyway, I wish you the best with your new relationship” As if feeling eyes on him, Ethan turns and fucking smiles at Ava.

“I plan to stay away from your life and I ask you do the same. Don’t come to my house, don’t hire bodyguards for me, don’t call me unless it concerns Noah and even then I prefer you pass any messages to your lawyer then he can forward it to mine” Her eyes were still fixed on Ethan The way she looked at him let me know that something was going on between them. I didn’t like the uncomfortable feeling I was having inside me.

She finally faces me. “I think I’ve said all there is to say…goodbye, Rowan” she then begins walking towards the door.

My heart is screaming for her to stop and I clench my fist against the unknown need to pull her to me. She stops and then turns around. “One more thing, please assure Emma that I don’t want anything to do with you and on that note, you might want to get the truth from her. If you want your relationship to work, then it can’t be built on lies she told just to get me into trouble” With that she walks away.

“Ava…” her names leaves my lips in a fucking plea.

I watch as Ethan meets her half way. He then takes her hand and leads her outside. I face forward just in time to see them making their way into the garden It takes everything in me to stop myself from losing control when I see Ethan kissing her I quickly turn around to avoid seeing them. My fucking heart drumming in my chest.

This is what I wanted. That she would move on and leave me and Emma the hell alone. I got what I wanted She was stepping aside. She had a new man. So why the hell did it feel like it was one big fucking mistake? Why did it feel like something inside me was dying?

She was supposed to be the wrong woman. Yet now that she walked away, I can’t help but feel lost.