Ch. 146..150: Forbidden Heat R18 Chapter 146-150

Chapter 146: Worthy of Protection

“Do you think...anyone heard us?” I asked a little shyly as I reflected on his beastly lovemaking. Judging from my very hoarse voice and the pain in my throat, I must have screamed quite a bit last night.

“I’m sure everyone heard you. If they’re not deaf that is...you were very loud. It was quite impressive, really,” Reiner replied like it was nothing as he laughed a little.

I didn’t understand how he could suddenly be so carefree about this, but I had to admit that I liked Reiner a lot better this way.

...

“Well then, we’ll be on our way...call me if anything happens,” Lucien instructed Reiner as he got into the driver’s seat. Today, Lucien and I are heading off to our long-awaited holiday before coming back for Lucien’s wedding to Angela this Sunday. After a few arguments with Reiner, he had very reluctantly agreed to let me go alone with Lucien. More like, I became too stubborn about it for him to handle and so he had to let me go and do things my way.

Lucien will be driving which meant that we would truly be alone on this trip together. I had a few things that I wanted to discuss with Lucien so perhaps this was for the best. I glanced at Lucien’s handsome but strained face as he drove. I wonder...how I would feel watching Lucien getting married for the second time to someone else. Would I be heartbroken? Would I feel like dying inside? Or...would I feel absolutely nothing?

Everyone who means something to me will be there at Lucien’s wedding. Lucien, Edward, Zak, and Reiner, all of them will be there at the wedding. Along with other guests that I didn’t want to see such as Madame Francesca. Ironically, Edward will be standing in as Lucien’s best man regardless of the tension between them.

“I heard that Edward will be your best man at your wedding?” I asked casually, looking for something to talk about to kill the time during our ride.

“Yes. He’ll be the best man at all my weddings, and I’ll be his best man at his wedding. Well, doesn’t seem like that would be happening anytime soon...” Lucien answered casually.

I wonder if Edward was the best man back when Lucien married my mother too. I don’t remember and I didn’t want to ask Lucien about it. ‘All of my weddings’...Lucien will probably marry again after he divorces Angela. Perhaps he’ll do it for another business deal or...

I agreed with Lucien that Edward doesn’t seem like he’s going to get married anytime soon. Although his womanizing gossip news have died down some what lately in the press, I’m sure he’s still fooling around with his harem of endlessly famous and popular women. Some time when it is quiet and I’m alone, I thought about Edward’s proposal; however, I have yet the grasp the true meaning behind his marriage proposal.

‘You should marry me. If I were you, I’d marry me as soon as possible,’ Edward’s words came back to haunt me very often. I wonder what he meant and what are his hidden intentions.

It’s truly unfortunate. If this trip had taken place a couple of months before this, I would be overjoyed to be spending quality alone time with Lucien. However, right now I had such mixed feelings and sometimes the sense of dread seemed to overweight the happiness. I had to talk to Lucien about the peeping hole and perhaps Edward’s proposal. Perhaps Lucien could shed some light on Edward’s intentions. How best to know your opponent? Ask his enemy.

...

We came to one of the beach villas that Lucien owns located on one of the private beaches that he owns. I barely think about things like this but if Lucien doesn’t have an heir, I will end up inheriting all his wealth including this private beach. The idea is so out-of-this-world alien to me that I have never thought of it before. We refer to it as a villa but in the end, this is just another oversized mansion that happens to be located close to the sea.

I looked up at the sunny blue sky with squinted eyes as I sat on the sand beach in my red bikini. I should be enjoying this trip but instead, all I was thinking about was how to start the conversation with Lucien. Suddenly, I felt the sand beneath me move as a topless Lucien sat down next to me. Wordlessly, we sat next to each other as we looked out into the mysterious blue ocean.

“Excited for the wedding?” I teased. I couldn’t think of anything else to say.

“Yes...but for a reason you wouldn’t be able to guess,” Lucien replied as he wrapped an arm around my back and winked at me. I laughed a little in reply as I leaned my head on his shoulder.

“I won’t start guessing then...” I replied as I sighed lazily.

We went back to silently observing the scenery around us. I hope we don’t get sunburnt. It would be funny for the groom to be peeling at his wedding.

“Have you thought a little about your future?” Lucien asked suddenly. His eyes still on the horizon far away.

Why is he asking this out of nowhere? It’s not like I haven’t thought about it, but I haven’t figured out what I wanted yet besides from immediate steps of starting a career of some sort.

“Why are you asking so suddenly?” I asked.

“Just answer me,” Lucien replied firmly.

“Hmm...I’ve thought about it quite a lot actually...but apart from starting a career or finding a job, I haven’t thought about anything extraordinary or long term,” I replied honestly.

“What kind of job do you want?” Lucien asked with interest.

I was taken aback a little by his change in attitude. I still remembered our last conversation on this topic and Lucien’s clear preference for me to remain jobless because no matter what I did I would never earn enough to change our or my own socio-economic status. Worst, that conversation also led to my house arrest.

“I’m not sure...I’ve thought of a few things related to my business major. I haven’t chosen yet...so maybe, I’ll just apply to a couple of places...” I replied honestly and hopefully.

“It’s good to have choices and more importantly, the freedom to choose. I envy you a lot, it’s a good problem to have. For Edward and I, we never had the luxury to fully choose our path in life. Edward rebelled a lot and ended up with some degree of freedom so only half of him is tied to the family business. I, on the other hand, am completely tied to the business and the whims of the elders,” Lucien stated emotionlessly. There was a far away look in his eyes and he was probably seeing something that I couldn’t see.

“...Do you regret it?” I asked hesitantly.

Lucien turned to face me, and our eyes met. His emerald-green eyes looked so serious yet very calm.

“No...and I’ll never regret it. I have things worth protecting you see...” Lucien said patiently as his warm hand traced the outlines of my face.

“...What do you...mean?” I asked without realizing that I had spoken out loud.

“As always, Edward will do things his way and I’ll do things my way. However, we both have something we want to protect and a promise that we have sworn to keep,” Lucien answered in a low voice, his eyes never leaving mine.

“What are you talking about...?” I asked as I felt a strong sense of foreboding.

“I’ll tell you a very old story between two old friends after the wedding is over,” Lucien replied before swiftly getting up and walking off.

What was that all about just now?

“Lucien!” I turned around to call out after him, but he never looked back.

Chapter 147: Painful Honesty

Tonight, dinner was served on the veranda outdoors. The candlelit dinner by the sea with the wind blowing in my face and hair reminded me of the dinner I had on the stargazing tower with Edward. The romantic atmosphere wasn’t the only reason that I was reminded of that night Edward told me about the fact that he saved me all those years ago in the forest. I felt that tonight, I will come to learn of some important hidden truth that will change the course of my life once again.

Lucien didn’t beat around the bush, thankfully so. After the maids left us alone, Lucien started talking immediately as I sat opposite him. Similar to the dinner I had with Edward that time, the food tasted like dry sand on my tongue.

“Can you tell me what it was like living with your mother? You know, before I met you two...” Lucien asked slightly hesitantly.

“Why are you asking after all this time? I thought my mother probably told you everything already,” I replied, thinking that it was unusual for him to bring this up. What good will asking about my childhood do?

“She did tell me, but I want to hear your version of the story more,” Lucien replied firmly.

“What do you want to know...specifically?” I asked him without bothering to hide my suspicion.

“Your living conditions. How did you two get by? Did your mother work? What type of school did you go to? All the general stuff. Just tell me whatever comes to mind,” Lucien replied.

“I don’t know why you’re asking me this and I was quite young back then. Anyways, my mother and I lived alone. It was just the two of us. My mother didn’t have a fulltime job. She worked on whatever job she was offered or sometimes she didn’t work at all. We always lived alone, and we moved places quite often...probably once every few months. Whenever that happened, I had to move school if the new place was too far from the old one. I didn’t have any close friends and my mother didn’t seem to have many friends either...so it was largely just the two of us,” I replied with an honest view of how I remembered my life from back then.

“So...it was always just the two of you?” Lucien asked a little surprised. I couldn’t quite understand why he was surprised.

“Yes, there was never anyone else,” I replied flatly. If Lucien wondered if my mother had a boyfriend of some sort on the side; then he can rest assured that she didn’t. However, if she did, I had never heard of or seen him before.

“What do you know...about your father?” Lucien asked seriously.

“What am I supposed to know? My mother never talked about him...except for that he left her after finding out that she was pregnant with me. She’s never seen or heard from him since. I don’t know his face or his name and, just as my mother advised, we think of him as better off dead,” I replied emotionlessly. I hated my father for leaving us, yet I didn’t quite hate him. It’s hard to hate someone you don’t know anything about at all.

“I see...” Lucien answered as he seemed deep in his own thoughts.

“Why are you asking this all of a sudden?” I asked, genuinely curious.

“No reason...” Lucien replied in a low whisper.

The candlelight flickering in his green eyes made it seem like his eyes were wavering with hesitation. Lucien would never ask questions like these without a logical reason which meant that there was something he wanted to confirm. Depending on my answer, he may or may not tell me something...but what was he going to tell me?

“Lucien...if there’s something you wanted to tell me...” I started to say before I was interrupted by another question.

“Do you remember how your mother died?” Lucien asked too directly for my frail heart to handle.

Of course, I remember. I remember everything about the day she died as if it had happened yesterday. Although, there wasn’t much to be remembered at all.

“Yes, I do...” I replied in a small voice as I tried to keep back my tears.

“Tell me...what happened...” Lucien instructed slowly yet firmly.

“I think you know this better than I do...my mother died in a car accident. I got a call from you telling me that she was in an accident and that she was at the hospital. However, when I arrived, she was already...gone...” I replied with my version of that day before stopping when my voice started to crack with sorrow.

That day, when I arrived at the hospital, my mother was already dead. I never made it in time to bid her farewell. Thinking back, I never got to see her face for the last time. When I grew up, I figured out that her body was probably not in the condition to be viewed by relatives, let alone a minor.

“The truth is...I didn’t make it in time either. When I arrived, your mother was already gone,” Lucien stated sadly.

“It doesn’t matter anymore. She’s gone...she’s not coming back,” I replied with clenched teeth.

“I want to tell you so many things, Natalia. All those things, you will find to be shocking and so, I honestly don’t know where to start or what to tell you. Perhaps, because of that you’ve been in so much pain...” Lucien confessed truthfully as he looked away towards the dark ocean.

“What do you mean...?” I asked.

Lucien was silent as he thought over his words. I could tell that he was very conflicted about what he was going to tell me. The suspense and sense of foreboding was killing me.

“Lucien...please...” I pleaded as I took his hand in mine and squeezed it.

“It’s going to hurt you...more than it has been hurting me all these years,” Lucien stated as he glanced back at me.

“I’ll take it...please tell me,” I said firmly.

“I see. Maybe you’ve grown to be much stronger than before. Natalia, your dear mother...was murdered,” Lucien stated in a painful voice.

My mother...was killed?!

That can’t be, I thought as I felt tears running down my face...

Chapter 148: His Intentions

“That can’t be!” I screamed as I got up from my seat.

“Unfortunately, it’s true...I had the same reaction when I found out,” Lucien responded softly as he heaved a heavy sigh.

“I studied so many news articles covering my mother’s death. It was very big news at the time...nothing about a murder was mentioned at all. It can’t be,” I said.

I remember cutting up newspapers to collect all articles about my mother’s accident so that I would learn more details about her death since no one would tell me anything. None of those articles mentioned anything about suspected foul play. Everyone was sure that it was an accident.

Just as when Lucien and my mother got married, her unfortunate death in an accident less than one year after the wedding caused a huge uproar. Everyone seemed to have something to say about their wedding and those people had a lot to say about my mother’s death as well. People who expressed genuine sympathy and grief were rarer than diamonds. Most people faked it while they honestly were thankful or even glad that my mother was gone from the Rosenhall family.

But...an unfortunate accident is just that...an accident.

“It’s actually common knowledge for senior family members of the family and the Elders that she was killed. The Elders invested a lot of money in keeping the truth under wraps. Of course, paying off the media was one of the many things that they did. We also decided to keep the truth from you, until you were older...or forever, in the case of the Elders. They didn’t want you to find out...at all,” Lucien stated as he frowned.

What he had just done was clearly in violation of the Elder’s wishes and verdict.

“Who killed my mother? And why?! My mother didn’t do anything...why did she have to die?!” I cried out in frustration and pain.

“We honestly don’t know...” Lucien replied truthfully.

“Then...how did you guys know that it wasn’t just an honest accident?” I asked, refusing to back down now that the truth was so close.

“The car was shot...that much was evident at the scene,” Lucien stated simply.

If we were in a drama, which I truly wished we were, this would be the moment that I would feel dizzy and faint from shock. Fainting right now to escape the pain and shock would be the solution that I most preferred. However, I knew I was no where close to fainting.

Why was my mother killed? Was it because she married Lucien and made numerous enemies as a result?

“I’m sorry, Natalia. I couldn’t protect your mother,” Lucien stated clearly.

It was clear that Lucien felt responsible for my mother’s death. Had he been living with this pain and regret all this time? I knew my mother’s death weighed heavily on his mind and heart, but I had always assumed that was because he loved her so much. Apparently, that was not the reason why.

“Natalia, I will keep you safe. Just like I’ve done for the past ten years. Even if I must be tied to this family forever, I will do it to keep you safe,” Lucien said passionately as he squeezed my hands in his.

“I don’t want things to be like this!” I cried out without thinking. Life is so unfair. I didn’t want things to be like this. Not for me...and not for Lucien.

“I’ve always done exactly as the family and the Elders wanted. In exchange, they will keep you safe. One day, I will become an Elder myself and I will be able to protect you myself. No matter what other people may say, your safety is my top priority. I love you...and I will not lose you like I lost your mother,” Lucien said very seriously. I have never seen Lucien so determined and serious.

I didn’t know how to respond. The reason Lucien had been acting overly protective and possessive must have something to do with his fear of losing me. He believed that I could get hurt...or worst. He’s made so many sacrifices for my mother and I, hasn’t he? But why...

‘I’ll never regret it. I have things worth protecting you see...we both have something we want to protect and a promise that we have sworn to keep’ Lucien’s words came back to me.

What promise did he make and with who?

“Lucien...I...” I started to speak; however, I wasn’t sure what I could say to him in this situation.

“You are going to stay with me forever. If I cannot trust that you will be happy and safe; I will not allow you to leave my side. That is final,” Lucien declared, and it was extremely clear that there was no room left for discussions or negotiations.

Chapter 149: Wedding Prelude

“You look magnificently beautiful...” Lucien said as he kissed a lock of my hair.

The day of the wedding had finally arrived. I couldn’t remember too well what Lucien looked like on the day he married my mother; however, today he was clearly very gorgeous. Formal tuxedos really do look best on Lucien. Today Lucien wore a white tuxedo which I thought looked fantastic on him because it contrasted well with his dark hair. Of course, he chose this outfit based on my recommendation and preference.

“You look great...” I replied with a sweet smile. Today was supposed to be a happy day for Lucien.

“Of course, you think that. You picked this outfit after all,” Lucien teased as he bent down to kiss me softly on the lips.

I smiled back at him. I imagined that if we were to get married, we would probably be having a conversation and sharing a moment very similar to this one. However, today, we were not getting married. Lucien is going to marry Angela today in a full-fledge ceremony with many VVIP guests and the press in attendance. I wouldn’t want to have such a public wedding like this, but to showcase the creation of new business ties, I guess this amount of publicity was necessary.

“It’s just business as usual. Don’t over think it, Natalia,” Lucien said casually as he took my hand in his and kissed its back gently.

Lucien’s reaction saddens me. What did he have to go through to be so resigned that his wedding is nothing but business as usual? Right, to Lucien this wedding was nothing more than a business deal that the Elders signed him up for. For some reason, I felt anxious and more worried about this whole affair than Lucien was. Perhaps because this wasn’t his first marriage of convenience, but Lucien was really treating it like a stroll in the park.

“Don’t worry for my sake. To me, this ceremony is like a business meeting except that I’m in a tuxedo instead of a regular suit. Head up and smile. I’ll wait to see beautiful photos of you,” Lucien comforted me when I was silent.

“Ok...please...be careful,” I said quietly.

Lucien pulled me up from my seat before hugging me tightly. In that moment, I believed that I felt and shared his pain more than any words could describe. Maybe what hurt us the most wasn’t seeing the other with someone else but knowing deep down that we couldn’t be together. Fate was too cruel.

I hugged him tightly to comfort myself rather than to comfort him. Wordlessly, I forgave him for everything. I shut my eyes tight...these tears must not fall.

“Lucien, we have to go...”

I turned to face Edward and Reiner standing at the door as Lucien slowly released me from his embrace. Lucien followed Edward out of the room as he instructed Reiner to take care of me. Edward was silent and his face was an unreadable mask. I knew dealing with these guys all at once would be a pain at best; I haven’t even met Zak yet.

Reiner and I walked out of the room in time to see the encounter between the brothers and their sister, Madame Francesca. This is the worst timing ever, I thought, as I froze in place. Reiner stood firmly beside me as we waited for the short greeting to come to an end.

“Natalia!” Zak’s voice calling my name cheerfully cut through the tense atmosphere. If there was a guy who didn’t give two fucks about the surrounding situation; it would be Prince Zak.

“Hi...Zak,” I answered back in a timid voice as I waved a little to him.

Prince Zak looked exactly like a prince in formal outfit with Madame Francesca looking like an old and evil queen standing next to him. I gulped as avoided my eyes from Madame Francesca. Unlike Zak, who was never scared of his own mother and knew how to manage her perfectly, I felt small and insignificant like a single grain of sand next to her.

“Lucien...Edward,” Madame Francesca said slowly in her intimidating voice as she greeted her younger brothers.

“Madame Francesca, it’s an honor to have you here at my wedding,” Lucien replied formally as he bowed slightly. Since Madame Francesca could be unofficially ranked higher than all three of the Elders combined, Lucien’s reaction does make a lot of sense. I quickly curtsied in time to Lucien’s bow while Reiner bowed low.

“Franky Frankenstein! How are you sis?” Edward greeted Madame Francesca loudly as he patted her back.

“Edward...” Madame Francesca hissed as she glared at Edward.

I knew Edward was famous for being rebellious in his younger days and even now but seeing it in person was very different. If Zak knew how to handle his mother; Edward didn’t care enough to bother handling her. The hate between Edward and his sister was clear as day. I wasn’t sure if Edward was brave or senselessly crazy, but it was clear that his independence from this family allowed him to act this way. There was not much the family or Madame Francesca could do when it came to Edward.

“Act happy and don’t ruin the mood, ok? I’ll be here to keep you in check after all...” Edward warned Madame Francesca in a teasing voice as he flashed her a perfect playboy smile.

“Wow...entertaining!” Zak cried out sadistically.

Madame Francesca was silent, but it was clear that she was boiling with anger as the two brothers walked off. I pray that there would be no repercussions from this event as I sighed.

“You should go ahead...I’m not escorting you by the way...” Zak stated bluntly as he shooed his mother off with his hand.

“Watch how you behave in front of the press,” Madame Francesca warned Zak sternly before walking off towards the main venue.

“Don’t I always?” Zak retorted.

That’s the point Zak! You never behave yourself in front of the press. I want to scream at Zak’s carefree attitude. Prince Zak was still the same after all these years.

Finally, when everyone else was gone, Zak turned to face Reiner and me. I haven’t seen Zak for a while and I miss him. In events like these where many members of the family were gathered, I couldn’t survive without Zak’s support.

“Hi Reiner. Have you been taking care of my Natalia well?” Zak asked in a playful voice; however, his menacing eyes were anything but playful.

Chapter 150: Please Stay

What is going on...? Zak...knows, doesn’t he...

“Zak...I...” I began to speak but Zak wasn’t paying me any attention. His eyes were firmly on Reiner.

“Yes, Master Zak,” Reiner replied before bowing politely.

“That’s good to hear. Natalia can be very needy, you see. Right, Natalia?” Zak continued to tease as he turned to me.

What is he saying? Why is Zak saying these things in front of Reiner?

“Zak...” I called his name with concern. This wasn’t Black Zak talking; it was Zak...so why is he saying these things?

“You need to pay attention to her every need, Reiner. Natalia and I, we didn’t used to just do it every day; we also did it everywhere...” Zak continued on casually as he shrugged a little.

“Stop it...Zak,” I pleaded as I grabbed his arm.

“Don’t worry, Natalia. Reiner already knows, doesn’t he?” Zak replied without a care.

My protests were immediately silenced when Zak started to kiss me right in front of Reiner. His kiss wasn’t especially forceful or aggressive, but I couldn’t push him away. Through years of training and spending time together, my body and mind could not resist Zak. He kissed me and I started to slowly melt and unravel in his warm arms as he lips and hot tongue continued teasing my mouth. Before long, I started to moan with pleasure as his hands dipped lower to caress my hips.

I was breathless when Zak finally let go of me. I felt ashamed of my own weakness and couldn’t face Reiner. The bond I had with Zak ran much deeper than anyone could understand. I wouldn’t be surprised if things would always remain like this between us my whole life. Surprisingly, I felt like I preferred it this way. Zak was just that much a part of me.

“I miss you so much, Natalia,” Zak said as he hugged my waist lovingly from behind. For a moment, I forgot that Reiner was still standing there watching us.

“Reiner, I...” I began to explain the situation, although, I wasn’t exactly sure what I should say.

“Too bad, Reiner. No one is good enough to completely replace me. Sadly, not even you,” Zak said as he sighed loudly at Reiner in disappointment.

“Master Zak...Miss Natalia is not your sex slave. Please let her go now...” Reiner stated tensely.

“She’s not and she knows it too. I told you this before, Natalia is the love of my life. You told me to let her go...I see. Natalia, would you be willing to let me go...forever?” Zak said a little slyly as he turned to question me.

The reason why this was sly was because he already knew the answer. He just wanted me to say it in front of Reiner.

“No...I can’t. Zak, please don’t leave!” I cried out as I hugged Zak tightly to me. I felt tears sting my eyes with just the thought of Zak leaving me.

“Well, there you have it. I might be able to let her go...but will she be able to take it? While you’re still here, take care of her for me, Reiner...” Zak said patiently as he hugged me closer to him to comfort me.

“Support her...they’ll be a lot of press here today. I’ll head in first, escort her in when she’s ready...” Zak instructed before turning to leave, placing me in Reiner’s arms instead.

“Zak...” I cried out his name softly.

“It was just hypothetical, Natalia. I won’t leave. There’s no need for you to get so upset...” Zak assured me before walking away.

I sighed as tears of relief ran down my face.

“Are you feeling better now? Sorry, you had to experience that. I guess it was partly my fault...” Reiner said apologetically as he stroked my head comfortingly.

“It’s not your fault. Please forgive Zak...he didn’t have any bad intentions,” I replied as I sniffed.

“If you say so...let’s clean up a little before we head into the main venue,” Reiner suggested, and I nodded obediently.

...

Reiner was deep in thought as he escorted Natalia all the way to the main venue where the guests and press were gathered in front. There were many people, and the area was crowded. The press and VVIP guests flooded the venue making the wedding seemed more like a red-carpet event.

What Edward, Lucien and I have been underestimating all this time is the strong and resilient bond between Natalia and Zak. Lucien probably isn’t even aware of their relationship; otherwise, there was very little that he could do about it given Zak’s position as Madame Francesca’s son. However, I find it very hard to believe that Madame Francesca would be in support of this relationship between her son and Natalia; perhaps she simply does not know?

Although Natalia has voiced her love for Lucien, it seemed like her bond with Zak is that much stronger. After all, what is love but a strong sense of attachment. Perhaps Natalia could live without Lucien...but could she do the same without Zak?

Zak on the other hand seemed to have no intention of keeping Natalia to himself. He still intends to marry Miss Annie while maintaining his relationship with Natalia and doesn’t seem at all concern about Natalia’s relationship with other men. Somehow, I don’t doubt Zak when he says that Natalia is the love of his life but...Zak’s definition of love...I wonder what it is like...

‘I might be able to let her go...but will she be able to take it?’ I recalled Zak’s meaningful words.

Seeing how Natalia instantly broke down at just the mention of the idea, the answer was clearly a ‘no’. Maybe this isn’t something that I can achieve alone. However, with Edward’s help perhaps we could turn things around...