Ch. 391..400

Chapter 391

Zev waited for Sasha on the trail where they'd said they would meet. When she finally arrived, Yhet hovering at her side, he was at Sasha's side in a heartbeat.

"What is it, what's wrong?" he said, hands at her waist, looking back and forth between Sasha and Yhet.

Yhet gave a nervous grimace and opened his mouth, but Sasha reached past Zev to put a hand to their friend's arm, as if to soothe him before she looked at Zev.

"It's okay, Zev. Yhet was just telling me about… about when his mate died and it made me sad. I was already frustrated about Nick. That's all. It's nothing."

"Oh," Zev looked up at their friend. "Are you okay, Yhet?"

"I will be," Yhet rumbled.

"Yhet, could you do me a favor?" Sasha asked and Zev wanted to growl. Her scent was a twist of so many feelings—anger, sadness, hurt, relief. They all tossed and tangled, as if she didn't know which to feel at any moment. "Can you run ahead to the City and let them know that I need to gather all the females—even those who aren't staying in the hall? Tell them it will be an hour or two."

"Of course," Yhet said, obviously relieved to have a reason to leave them. "I'll see you back at the City."

They both nodded and Zev braced Sasha as Yhet turned and ran down the trail, making the ground shiver for several seconds until he was out of sight.

Then Zev turned to her, still holding her at her waist and leaning down over her, frowning. "What did Nick say?"

Sasha shook her head. "Either he didn't know about me, or he covered really well. He didn't get suspicious or cagey. It seemed like he was just answering my questions about the females. Like he didn't suspect anything. Or maybe he just didn't care?"

Bingo. Zev muttered a curse. "He definitely doesn't care. Are you okay?"

"I think so," she said hesitantly. "I did find out one thing that I think is important. Or confirmed it, anyway." The uncertainty in her scent—and the hurt—shoved to the forefront. Zev held her more tightly.

"What's that?"

Sasha swallowed and looked down. "He said that the other females that you… bred with… it wasn't that they got pregnant and lost it or anything like that. They just… never got pregnant at all."

Zev went very still. His stomach churned. He felt ill. He felt cold. He felt so angry—and so scared. He stared down at Sasha until she finally found the courage to meet his eyes.

"That's… good news, I suppose," he said softly, then braced himself. "Are you okay?"

When Sasha shook her head, he wanted to bite something.

"What can I do, Sash? Just tell me, please…"

"Nothing. There's nothing you can do. It all happened in the past."

She started to turn as if to walk up the trail, but he held her, stopped her from moving and she relaxed back into his arms. "Sasha…" he had to clear his throat. "I know I can't change the past. But… this is about our future. Please. Talk to me. Tell me what you need. I wish I could take it back."

"I wish you could too," she didn't smell angry, but very sad. And very hurt.

Zev wanted to scream. "You know I have no feelings for any of them, right? That I never would have chosen that?"

Sasha made a strange, strangled huffing sound. "Zev, I… Nick took me to the breeding arena Zev. And there was a pair in there… I just… it was sick, and sad, and there was nothing there that was sexy or… it just broke my heart. It broke my heart for you, and it broke my heart for me, because there was no love in that. And…" she made a noise that he knew meant she was frustrated with herself because she was beginning to cry. "I just hate it, Zev. I hate it so much."

"I do to. And I hate what it does to you, Sash. I do."

"I know, but you didn't see them, Zev. Those females… I met some of them and they were… They're over there aching for you Zev."

Zev screwed his eyes closed and he dropped his chin.

"You should have heard the sound one of them made when they learned that I was your mate, Zev. They'd been pining for you the way the males here pined for their mates. They were bonded to you, even if you weren't bonded to them and… it was killing them."

Fuck. He was going to be sick. He stepped back, letting her go, looking around. He wanted to run, to fight something. He needed to do something. But what?

"And the thing that kills me, Zev is… Those females… we're going to save them." Her tears spilled over. "I'm going to have to be with you in front of them and that's going to hurt them even more than it does me—and that pisses me off. Because it hurts me, Zev. You hurt me when you made that choice, and I get it. I get that you didn't want it, and I get that they were controlling you—and I get that the females wanted it and were there willingly. But the whole thing is just so sick and the thought of you… with them…" A little sob broke in her throat and she stepped back, away from him, hands to her mouth. She was trembling.

Zev thought he might vomit. "Sasha," he rasped. "I'm so sorry… so sorry… I don't know what to say."

"Neither do I."

They stared at each other and for a minute Zev wondered if his heart could break again when she was right there in front of him. Because that was how it felt.

But then her face crumpled, and she threw herself into his arms and Zev, taken off guard, grunted, but pulled her in, trembling and tense, but relieved. So relieved.

"I love you, Zev. I love you so much. I know we can't change it. I'm trying to let it go. I am. I just… it hurts so much."

"I know, babe. I know."

 

Chapter 392

They held each other for a long time. Zev stroked her hair and her back and kissed her temple, whispered his love, and pleaded for forgiveness, and she said she gave it. And even though her body wasn't as tight when she finally pulled back, he wasn't sure.

He wasn't sure he could ever have forgiven her if the roles were reversed. Could he judge her for struggling with it?

Sasha stepped out of his arms and wiped her face. "I am so damn sick of crying," she said, with a watery chuckle. "I love you, Zev. And I want to stop being sad. We're going to have to… we're going to have to just figure it out when it all happens because there's no time now, okay? But just please… please tell me if there's anything else. Anything that these women have of you?"

"Nothing," he whispered. "I vow it, Sasha."

She sighed. "You can't fix this, Zev. But you are going to have to tell them how sorry you are. Because those women are in pain. They've lost their mates just as surely as Yhet did and… I hate being a part of that."

"Me too," he whispered. Then he didn't know what else to say

But as usual his amazing mate was kind. She started walking and as he followed her, she changed the subject.

She told him that Nick said the females only ever got weaker when they were closed up instead of being free in Thana—and she thinks that's a byproduct of the human influence. Being caged. Being controlled.

Zev's mind drifted to his own troubles sleeping and the panics that could come upon him.

"Zev, it doesn't matter what medications or supplements or how good the food is, when people's minds aren't healthy their bodies aren't healthy."

"I know. You're right."

Then she turned to him, and now there was concern in her eyes. After all he'd put her through she was worried about him?

"Is that why you're on edge too? Why you don't sleep well and don't want to be inside? Is that why you didn't go with me to talk to Nick?"

Zev cleared his throat. "Yes, some. I have… struggles, too, I suppose. Some days are worse than others. Some days I'm fine unless something happens or I can smell them—like when you came back. Other days there's stuff that sends me into a panic and I don't even know why."

Sasha nodded slowly. "Do I smell right now? Of Nick, I mean."

Zev grimaced. "It's not bad, I'm guessing you didn't really touch him. But yeah, I can smell him."

"I'm sorry—"

"Sasha, you owe me no apologies about this. At all. Don't worry, it'll fade. But I still… I just hate it. It brings back feelings and ways I used to be afraid. When I can't sleep it's like that. This feeling of being caged. I think that's half of why Yhet wants to be moving all the time. He's proving to himself that he's not being controlled."

Sasha took his hand. "Were you caged all the time?"

He huffed a breath. "No, that's the stupid thing. The females and the lab males had it so much worse than me. They stayed at the compound or in the labs. I was… living a life. I mean, I was monitored. I lived with Nick or with others that were on training. But we had some freedom. They… I think they put something in me. They always seemed to know where I was. I found a lump on my back once and had one of the others cut it out. They'd put some kind of tech under my skin. I never found another one, but they still never seemed to struggle to find me. They just had to catch me. Until the day I got you, I never ran from them. It's hard to explain, Sasha. I can't tell you why except that it always just seemed impossible. Or I thought they'd hurt you."

Sasha hugged his arm as they walked, and he pulled her to a stop to hold her. They both stood there, breathing. Zev trembled.

"I wish everything was different," Sasha whispered after a few minutes.

"So do I. But you figured it out. We're going to make things different for ourselves."

She nodded. "Are you going to talk to Nick?"

"No. I think I'd kill him if he was in front of me." His words were dark and certain.

Sasha looked up at him, her eyes pinched in concern. "You can't carry around hate like that, Zev. It'll eat you up."

He remembered Skhal's words from earlier and shook his head, his jaw tense.

"You're trying to tell me you don't hate him for knowing that we had a baby and not telling us?"

Sasha's lips twisted. "Honestly, I wanted to scream at him when I first saw him, but I fought it back and he was… normal."

"That's because he's used to knowing things that are going to destroy you, and not telling you until he can use them."

Sasha nodded. They started walking again, both of them quiet. Then she sighed. "I really don't want to talk about this with anyone else. And the males are so… no boundaries. Can you please promise not to tell the others about this? I just want this to be between us."

"Sure, of course."

"I mean, if you need to talk to someone about it—"

"Who would I talk to other than you, Sash? My brother's in love with a female who can't have kids, so that's a slap in the face. Yhet never had offspring. Skhal never mated—and even though I think Dunken and Jhon will, they haven't yet. No one around me is going to understand this. I don't think I even understand it."

Sasha nodded. "That's how I feel, too."

"Well, there then. We'll talk to each other about it and maybe between us we can figure it out. But regardless… I'm here, Sash. Okay? Anytime you want to talk about any of it. I wish I could change so much, that I can't. But what I can do is be here now and make the future better."

They walked on then, side to side, hands clasped.

Zev just prayed that she could heal from the hell he'd sentenced her with.

 

Chapter 393

After what Nick had said to Sasha about the females getting weaker, she and Kyelle spent the next three days helping the females grieve the lost sister—and urging them to step out and face their fears. To begin to live. To get out of the hall and start interacting with the males. And while the females weren't going to integrate fully with the males in the City yet, they were already beginning to see some progress.

Zev was grateful for the boost of encouragement it gave Sasha, who was still struggling with knowing they'd lost a baby.

Zev hated feeling so helpless, so uncertain, but he just held her and together they tried to look forward, to a new life uninterrupted by the humans.

They both prayed that their hopes for the new life in the safe land weren't foolish.

Reports came from Skhal and Lhars that the Creatures who were going had already started to move, the first of them—loners mainly—taking the Gateway the day after they met with Sasha. That raised Zev's spirits. He liked the idea of the Creatures, who were all male and would never find mates, still having hope for a new life. And who knew? Was it possible there would be females for some of them in the new land? They could hope and pray. And they did.

As the day for Nick to meet the humans drew closer, Zev and Sasha both grew more tense. Sasha told him that Nick swore the humans hadn't worried last week that there weren't medical notes from Patty. Nick had told the board that the Chimera were focused on getting the females settled, that everyone was healthy, and that they were initially distrustful because none of them knew Patty. That with all the recent change, Patty was working on gaining their trust.

But he had admitted it would become more and more suspicious over time.

Zev still hadn't spoken with Nick personally, still didn't trust himself in the man's presence. So he'd been filled in by Sasha. Together they'd agreed that they needed to move sooner rather than later. But Sasha felt that the females weren't ready yet, so she threw all her energy into getting them out of their fear and into some kind of normal life in the hopes it would embolden them.

The day before Nick was to return to the humans for another update, Sasha was once again busy with the females, so Zev went for a walk with Jhon who had questions about approaching the females who were reintegrating.

It was an easy relief to walk through the forest with his friend, their conversation tripping back and forth between teasing jokes, and serious discussion of the females.

"I just wonder whether they'll ever really settle again," Jhon said. "The males are getting restless, Zev. They might not be talking to you about it because everyone can see how protective you are of Sasha. As it should be. But… the males want mates. They want to be close to females. They want to display.

Zev was uneasy, uncertain how to respond. They hadn't told the Chimera yet that all the females currently here were barren. Hadn't wanted to add that extra pressure to the females who were working so hard to find their confidence.

Zev was torn between warning his friend, and not adding to the plate of the females.

He sighed. "Look, I get it. If I thought someone who was my Sasha was there, I'd be impatient too. I'll talk to the Alphas and see if we can get the word out again—if the males start pressuring them, they're only going to delay the progress. These females have been through so much. And we're hopeful that we'll have more soon. These aren't the last females we'll all see for the rest of our lives." He hoped that was true.

"But how?" Jhon asked.

"Sasha has a plan. Don't worry, brother. Look what she's managed already."

Jhon nodded, but his face was pained. "But these females are here, Zev. After three years, they're here and… it's driving everyone crazy. The only saving grace is that none of them have gone into heat—could you imagine the shitshow when the first one does?"

Zev stopped cold. Shit.

Of course. It had been so long since he'd been around Chimeran females in heat…

Shit.

He was going to have to talk to Sasha.

In previous years a female going into heat would be only a minor disruption—a few males at her level displaying and trying to tempt her. And possibly being successful if she was ready to take a mate.

But now? After three years? After having lost them, and finally having them back? The males would lose their minds.

Except… did barren females go into heat?

If they didn't, everyone was going to notice within another week or so. They might put a few weeks without a heat down to the changes and trauma the females had been through. But the entire group? For months?

Zev needed to talk to Sasha. They were going to have to figure out how to communicate about this.

He realized his friend was staring at him expectantly, and he cleared his throat. "I'll talk to Sasha. You're right. I hadn't thought about it."

Jhon nodded and opened his mouth, but just as he did, the sound of hoofbeats on the trail behind them sounded. They both turned, wary, but the breeze brought the scent of Dunken approaching—and approaching quickly.

They stopped and waited, Zev's heart beating faster. Dunken was usually pretty unflappable. If he was hurrying, there was a good reason for it.

When he was almost to them, he shifted, still running the final feet until he slid to a halt in front of them, smiling.

Zev was glad to see the smile. "What is it?"

Dunken's eyes twinkled. "Nick has to see the humans tomorrow."

"Yes. And?"

"He wants to bathe. I told the guards to hold him up by telling him we needed to make sure there were no females there. But he's pretty eager, apparently. I guess it's time. Ernie's close—and I think he's the reason Nick hasn't just walked out by himself."

Zev smiled and Jhon chuckled.

Finally.

Without another word, Dunken turned on his heel and all three of them shifted and started running back to the village.

 

Chapter 394

The bathing pools were in chaos.

Zev had hung back, staying out of sight while the other two went ahead to the pools. Apparently, Nick had arrived with his guards just a minute before them—after they'd been cleared to make sure there were no females. They'd placed a handful of males around—some in the water, some out. But Dunken and Jhon pretended they were only there to speak with one of the guards.

Then Zev had seen Ernie scuttling up the path. He raised his head over the underbrush and they shared a grin as the spider man arched his back to make his legs spread wider before he reached Nick.

Zev had heard the shout, and half-laughed, half-growled when he heard the splashing as if Nick was running for the shore.

But then the other male's voices rose, taunting him—and Ernie.

Now, as Zev crept towards the pools, staying off the trail and low so that he wouldn't be seen by Nick, there was a cacophony of voices, splashing, and shrieks from Nick that gave Zev a very sincere jolt of pleasure.

"Eat your own shit and die, Nick," he muttered as he took wolf form to slide through the last rows of trees and underbrush. His wolf was large but camouflaged better, and he needed to see where the others had stood to give him access to the device and guard him from Nick's eyes.

As the pools became visible through gaps in the undergrowth, Zev moved low on his haunches, keeping his back below the level of the bushes, and moving to the right when he saw where the other males had lined up on the shore.

Where the trail entered the clearing, Ernie stood at the water's edge. Zev and the other males were to his right, Zev in the bushes, the other males lined up in a group as if they were spectators at a sporting match. While Nick stayed low in the deep water on the opposite side of the pool, his face a mask of fear.

"Stay away from me!"

"Come now, Nick… we're all just males trying to make the best impression on the world," Ernie's strange voice was easy to discern because it was so sharp compared to the others. It always made Zev want to tilt his head and rub his ears. "I won't eat you if you don't splash me."

"Stay away, you freak!"

"Tsk tsk. Such cruel words, Nick. Hit me right in my feels. Spiders have feelings too, you know."

"This isn't funny. I'm just trying to get clean before I go back to the humans. They'll think something is wrong if I show up dirty!"

"Careful, Nick. We don't pee on your bed, so don't shit in our pool!" Jhon called.

The males all guffawed. Nick scowled, but then Ernie actually started into the water and Nick made a high, strangled noise and scrambled back, out of the way—but he was effectively locked on the other side of the pool, unable to get out because of the sheer rocky sides of the land rise on that side, but Ernie standing in the shallows between him and shore where he'd entered.

Zev took fierce pleasure in seeing Nick so frightened, but he couldn't afford to sit there and enjoy it. Eventually, it would become obvious that the males were up to something. He had to get to that device.

Shifting back to his human form, he knelt between two thick bushes near a rock where Nick had left his clothing, towel, and likely the device.

Praying that he wasn't noticeable through the forest of male legs that stood between him and Nick, Zev crawled out, reached under the towel and found the device, and pulled it back into the trees.

While the voices in the pools continued to rise—along with waves of laughter—he used trembling fingers to turn the little tablet on. He held his breath as he entered his thumbprint, praying that they hadn't thought to remove his profile from the system.

The device scanned for a long time, but then it opened with a small beep.

Zev froze. The males were laughing and shouting at Nick and Nick's full attention appeared to be on Ernie—who was crowing about how the hair on his spider legs would let him stand on top of the water if that would make Nick more comfortable?

"Then at least you can see all of me…and I can move a lot faster," Ernie said, his voice that grating call.

When there was no indication that Nick had heard the device, Zev turned the sound off, then moved quickly through the menus until he could bring up files, opening Sasha's immediately and scanning it.

Vitals. Details. Medical history…

Zev read quickly, hungrily, scanning through everything he could find. But it was all the old information. Everything they'd had on her before he took her from the human world. All things he'd seen before.

Why hadn't they updated the file before Nick came?

Growling in frustration, Zev peered between the bushes to make sure the males were still blocking him from Nick's sight, then tapped through a few more screens to see if they'd hidden information on her in other parts of her profile. But no… nothing. Nothing new. And definitely no results or information from her time at the Compound.

Shit.

Heart dropping to his toes, and frustration rising to anger, Zev was about to shut the device down when he realized this was the chance to confirm what Norm had told them about the females.

Quickly, with glances up every few seconds to make sure Nick hadn't somehow gotten out of the pool, he flipped through the software to look up Mae's profile first and see where her fertility status was logged.

But what he saw first stopped his breath.

The code that followed indicated a date a few months from that day.

Zev raised his head, thinking quickly. It couldn't be, could it?

He swallowed hard.

Harvesting was the process of collecting a Chimeran's organs and blood for use as donors for human patients.

No one lived through it.

 

Chapter 395

Well beyond nerves, Zev was beginning to shake with pure horror. Poor Mae.

But… it couldn't be. Harvest was a last resort—usually only used when a Chimera had some kind of disease or had given up mentally. Because once the resource was used up, there was nothing left.

Why would the Board send Mae here if they'd intended to harvest her?

He licked his lips. But maybe that was what had saved her? Maybe that's why she was chosen? Maybe she'd been sent here instead of being harvested.

He hoped so. Sasha loved Mae. She would have been heartbroken if the female was gone.

Suddenly grateful, Zev tapped out of Mae's information and searched up Pysa's.

But his chest tightened and his stomach flipped over as he saw the same status at the top of her profile.

** CLEARED FOR HARVEST **

Desperately, he flipped out and tried another of the females. Then another.

His breath stopped and his throat closed as one after another, after another, he found the same thing.

All these females, every one whose name he could recall, had been sent here before an expected harvest five or six months in the future.

As the voices in the clearing rose and splashing reminded him that he was short on time, Zev stared at the screen. But then the males made "Whoa!" noises and laughed, and the splashing indicated maybe Nick was making a dive for the shore.

Without thought, Zev quickly turned the device off and pushed it back under the towel, then slipped back into the underbrush.

He didn't wait for the males to leave. He didn't want to see Nick. He couldn't. He shifted to his wolf and started through the trees, waiting only until he knew Nick's human eyes wouldn't be able to pick him out, then he started to run.

It couldn't be. It couldn't be.

Nick had brought through dozens of females… all of them just months from the butcher's block?

When a Chimera was harvested, their organs and blood were collected to be used to help humans. They didn't live through the process. Was their presence here an attempt to make them healthy enough that they could still be used in other ways? Or were they just here to…

Zev was grateful to be in his wolf. His human form might have vomited.

He had a very bad, sinking feeling that the females had been brought to Thana in some fucked up version of fattening them for slaughter. That perhaps Sasha's work at the compound had only been coincidental.

What if they'd intended to send the females here anyway? Or what if they only sent the ones that were marked for harvest so that if they lost one it didn't matter?

But that meant that their agreement with Sasha was a complete ruse. Not just a deception. It didn't just hide manipulation. They had lied to her, outright. She'd said they were sending females as a test to see if they'd become more fertile by being here. But if these females couldn't breed, it wasn't just that the experiment was destined to fail, it was that they were trying to get Sasha and Zev's help to prepare these females, to make them healthier before they killed them!

Zev snarled and slid to a halt, turning mid-stride, instinctively wanting to return to Nick to bite out the male's throat.

But Zev forced himself back to human form and stopped, panting, staring at the trees.

It was all so dark. So sinister. So… cold.

He was being used again.

He wanted nothing more than to go back and yank Nick out of the water, attack, and kill the man for his part in this. But even as his body twitched and he took a step forward, he caught himself.

If Nick learned that they knew, he would immediately begin working against them. He would have to. He wasn't going to lose his protection—he'd run for the human world and warn them and their chance to get everyone out of here would be over.

His chest rose and fell too quickly, though he felt like he had no breath.

Was the whole thing a ruse? All of it? Patty. Nick. The females… was every step just another step closer to the Chimeran abattoir?

And he and Sasha had bought it. All of it. Or at least, they hadn't seen through it.

Fuck!

A whine broke in his throat, and he clenched his fists. He didn't want to tell Sasha. Knew what a blow it would be to her. Knew what it meant for all of them. But knew that he had to.

Fuck.

FUCK.

Teeth gritted, he let his eyes rise to the sky above, the tree canopy overhead looking black against the high cloud and bright blue sky of the morning.

"Sasha believes you're good!" he hissed at this fucking God that she was so certain loved him. "And you do this? You let us get fooled time and time again? Those poor females who did nothing to put themselves in this situation—you're just going to let them die? Well, fuck you! FUCK YOU!" he snarled. "If you won't save them, I will!"

A wind rushed up, rustling the leaves of the trees overhead and Zev snapped his teeth at it. Then he turned on his heel and ran, pushing against the earth, breath tearing in his throat, then leaped into his wolf and galloped back towards the trail to the City.

No way. Not on his watch. If he had to break his mate's heart to make sure she understood, he would do it. There were no other options. They knew. They knew exactly where they stood now. And Zev was done trying to work things out. He was done putting any faith in anyone other than Sasha.

He would tell her. They would get the rest of the creatures out of here, and then they'd leave. It was that simple.

There was no other choice.

 

Chapter 396

Sasha was seated cross-legged on fur in the female hall, talking to Mae. The other females had all been encouraged to make their own meal for lunch. It was one of the few normal tasks she and Kyelle had come up with that to help the females start working towards being back in a normal routine. To focus on things outside of themselves, instead of their pain.

They'd brought fruit, meat, and grains. And most of the females that were still isolating themselves had happily engaged. They sat in a large circle at the center of the hall, shelling peas, mixing dough, and cutting fruit.

There was talk of making a fire, but that would require removing some of the hides from the window to allow airflow. Sasha hadn't decided whether that was a good sign or not.

But she had noticed that Mae, while helping others grow in their confidence and urging them to give the tasks a try, hadn't sat in the circle herself.

She'd kept herself away from the others—even more so this last day or so.

Sasha was worried.

So as the females began to work together—those who'd spent time in the sanctuary helping those who'd been in the apartments and had forgotten some of their skills—she'd sidled up to Mae's side.

"You know, this is important for you, too," she said, keeping her voice below the hubbub of the circle on the floor.

Mae shrugged. "I want to catch any of them that might become afraid and try to leave," she said, but she didn't meet Sasha's eyes.

"Mae, I—"

"Sasha, please don't," Mae said baldly. And finally turned to look at her. "I know what you're going to say. It's exactly what I would say to one of the others. I get it. But knowing what is best, and trusting it… those are two different things.

"I focus outside myself by helping the others find their feet again," she said through her teeth, turning back to watch the woman working. "The rest… the rest will have to wait."

Sasha sighed and put a hand to Mae's shoulder. "I know this is incredibly hard, but I talked to Zev, and—"

Suddenly, the door from the stairway flew open so fast it banged against the wall. All the females startled, some shrieking and covering their heads, others immediately on their feet and defensive.

Mae hissed and flowed towards the door before Sasha could even turn all the way around—to find Zev standing there, struggling against two guards.

His voice boomed, not in the room, but in her head.

Sasha! It's important! I need you. NOW.

Mae snarled and put herself in front of him. Zev wasn't letting the guards remove him, but he was trying not to fight them either.

"You get out of here, male! Alpha or not, you are not welcome!" Mae snapped, her body rippling with the desire to shift.

"Sasha!"

"Zev, what—" she was already hurrying towards him, but when he leaned around Mae, his face urgent and tight, Mae stepped into his path and hissed at him to get back again.

Sasha hurried over to put herself between them, trying to talk Mae down even as she answered Zev in her head.

What are you doing? Why didn't you just call for me?

This can't wait. I'm serious. This is serious!

Sasha kept her hands on Mae's shoulders, moving her head to put herself in Mae's eye-line every time the female tried to get to Zev.

But Mae wasn't fighting her. The truth was, even though she was short for a Chimera, Mae was still more than a match for Sasha. She was submitted, and she didn't put her Alpha out of the way.

"Mae, he's come for me. I'll leave and take him with me—look at me. Mae? The females need you. They need someone to help them calm. This isn't a threat to you, or to them, are you hearing me? He's here for me."

It took a moment to break through, but then Mae blinked and nodded. When she finally submitted and turned back to the room, all the other females were either on their feet or curled into embraces with others.

"I'm sorry," Sasha called. "Please, just rest and go back to your task. He's here for me," she called to them.

When Mae reached them, she was still moving tightly, but her hands were gentle as she touched the females and spoke to them quietly, moving among them, reassuring and calm.

Sasha shook her head, then turned back to Zev with her jaw clenched.

"Let him go," she ordered the guards—who released him immediately. Then she grabbed him by the front of his furs and pulled him out of the room. "I can't believe you did that!" she hissed as they trotted down the stairs. "Those poor females were finally starting to enjoy themselves."

"I'm sorry," he said, hovering at her shoulder. "I wasn't thinking clearly."

"Why not? What's happened?" she asked, knowing he wouldn't have burst in like that on a whim.

"I—" he cut himself off as they reached the bottom of the stairs and walked out of the building into the courtyard. He looked around, then frowned. "I need to get you somewhere private," he said, his voice dark. "Please, Sasha. This is really important."

She stared at him. She was supposed to be meeting Kyelle in an hour—after lunch—to figure out a task for the females for the afternoon, or maybe take some of them on a walk. But Zev's face was haggard and everything in him trembled with urgency.

How bad is it? she asked in his head.

His eyes dragged closed for a moment and his face crumpled. There's too much to explain and I don't want to tell you here with witnesses. Just… please, Sasha. We need to go be alone.

Stomach flipping in fear, she nodded, and when he shifted, she crawled onto his back and clutched his fur as he ran from the City.

 

Chapter 397

Even in his wolf, Sasha could feel the tension in Zev. His shoulders were a solid block of marble under her hands, and his gait was stilted.

Zev, are you okay? she thought to him, but he shook his head so hard his ears flapped.

Just give me a minute. We aren't going far.

His voice sounded dead in her head and it made her nerves spike, but true to his word he didn't run far. Just a couple minutes later he veered off the trail, pushing through bushes and between trees, until the trees opened to reveal a dip in the land and a creek, about six feet across.

The water gurgled and danced quietly, and the wind rustled the leaves of the trees overhead, but there was no other sound.

Sasha slid off his back and then Zev shifted back, immediately beginning to pace in front of her, up and down the water's edge.

"Zev, what's going on? You're scaring me."

"I'm sorry," he said, his voice a low growl. "You don't need to be scared of me. I'm just… I'm just so fucking angry."

"Why, what's happened?"

His jaw flexed and he glanced at from the side, but kept pacing. "I got my hands on Nick's device," he said quietly.

Sasha's head jerked back. "How? He said it could only be opened with a fingerprint or retina—"

"I'm still in their system."

Sasha's mouth dropped open.

Zev nodded at the comprehension on her face. "I looked you up first, to see if they said anything, but there's nothing new on there. For whatever reason, they haven't added anything to your file from when you were in the compound. That was a dead end."

Sasha slumped, but a part of her wondered if it was better not to know. "Okay, then, what—"

"Since I had a minute, I looked up some of the others," Zev said, and his voice went very tight. Sasha swallowed. He wouldn't stop pacing. "Sasha… they're all… they're not just infertile… they're marked for harvest. All of them."

"Harvest? You mean, their eggs? Like, IVF or something?"

He stopped walking suddenly and turned to face her, both hands in his hair. "No, Sash. When a Chimera is harvested it means that they're… everything is taken. Their blood. Their organs. Their eyes… it's what they do when a Chimera can't be used for their experiments or whatever. Or they get too sick—they use their parts to make a human healthier."

Sasha was reeling. "You… what?!"

He stepped up to her, leaning in, his eyes pleading even as every inch of him quivered with anger. "Norm was right. None of them can breed. And all of them were marked for harvest within five or six months."

"That's when they were supposed to be bringing more females through… if I got pregnant, or the others did…"

"It was a lie, Sash. This was set up to fail from the beginning. They let you think they were giving us a chance, but those females they sent will only "prove" that your theory didn't work. Then they'll take them all back, harvest them, take you back, and me…"

He started pacing again, Sasha gaping at his back.

"But that doesn't make sense. Why would they send them at all? Why even want me to think they were trying? It's still a risk. Why would they do it?"

"I can't be sure, but…" he hesitated, raking a hand through his hair.

"What?"

"Sasha, it's so ugly—"

"Tell me."

He stopped again a few feet away and turned to face her. "They didn't send those females here to breed. They sent them here to get healthier before they killed them. They gave them to us to help them so when they harvested them, they'd be in better physical shape."

"WHAT?!"

Zev's face was a picture of torment and rage. "If the females were marked for harvest it means they were the weakest and least thriving of the lot. I think they sent them here to try and get them healthy. But that must mean they were always planning to come get them. They have to know the females wouldn't return of their own free will. So they sent them here to get us to embrace them and hopefully heal them before they stole them back and slaughtered them."

Sasha's entire body went cold, then white-hot. "Those… fuckers."

Zev nodded. "I want to kill him, Sash. I'm serious. I had to leave. The guys pinned him in the bathing pools for me so I could get on the device. I had to leave. I was so angry I would have attacked him if I'd faced him."

"Zev," she breathed, "Does that mean they can tell you used the device? Isn't that the one Nick's going to give to the Team when he goes back?"

Zev gaped. Holy shit. She was right.

Sasha's face crumpled. "How bad is it? Will they know right away?"

Zev swallowed. "No, I mean… there's a log. They'd have to look at it intentionally, but they'll probably be looking for stuff from Patty, so they'll find it."

"Zev! What were you thinking?!"

But he shook his head. "It doesn't matter, Sasha. Listen to me, this is already reached critical mass. We have to go. There's no negotiating with these people. There's no reason. They are evil. We have to get out of here. We have to. And we have to do it before they realize that we're onto them."

Sasha turned away from him. She was nodding because he was right, but even under her fear that they'd see Zev's betrayal, the logistics of moving this quickly… the females were still so broken. The Creatures still had today and some might still be moving. She felt like she'd just walked onto the field to play a game, only to find herself on an entirely different field. And yet, she had no choice but to play.

"You're right," she said suddenly. Because he was. It didn't matter how dangerous it was. It didn't matter how broken they all were. "That's it. We're done. We have to move on this. The humans are expecting Nick tomorrow afternoon, right? Then we have to leave the next day."

Zev's eyes were hollow and sad, but he nodded.

This should have felt triumphant. It should have felt strong. Instead she felt like a fool. Of course they hadn't been listening to her. Of course she hadn't convinced them.

What an idiot.

But that thought just made her spitting mad.

"You tell Skhal to tell the Creatures, this is it. All or nothing. Tonight they get out of here. Tomorrow Nick and the humans cross. As soon as he's back… we're moving. We're leaving Zev. They've got twenty-four hours to pack."

 

Chapter 398

The following hours were a blur. She wanted to be with the females, preparing them, reassuring them—helping them recover from their shock. But there was too much to do. And every time she or Zev thought of something new, they had to reevaluate and start again.

She'd already gotten word to Skhal to tell the Creatures it was happening, and happening fast. It was time to move.

She'd already gotten a message to Kyelle to start preparing the females for the idea that they might have to leave the hall in the next couple days.

She'd already hugged Yhet when he walked through the Courtyard, just because it made her feel better.

But then Zev pulled her away from a conversation with the Alphas about what they should and shouldn't advise their people to pack, and dragged her up to their bed-chamber. When he turned to face her, he was pale.

"The bond," he said quickly.

"What?"

"The bond. You're still thinking you'll get the females yourself, right?"

"I'm not just thinking it, Zev, I have to. They're expecting me."

He shook his head. "We forgot about the bond."

"What do you mean—?"

"Sasha, I felt like I had a heart attack last time we got separated by the Gateway, do you remember?"

She'd stopped breathing just at the memory. "I… yes."

Zev's face was stormy. "You can't go crossing back and forth. We have to stay together—that's got to be what it means, right? The Gateway cuts us apart, and Sasha, I don't know what's going to happen next time. We can't just hope for the best. We have to bring other people into this. You have to send some of the others through and see if they can find the females. You and I have to go together."

"What?! But we can't, Zev! Nick said—"

"DON'T SPEAK HIS FUCKING NAME TO ME!" Zev roared.

Sasha startled and stared at him.

Zev covered his face with both hands. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm just…"

"Zev, what is going on?"

He let go of a shuddering breath, shaking his head and pulling himself together. Sasha stepped up to put her arms around his waist and stroke his back.

"Zev, breathe, please. What's going on?"

"You know what's going on," he said darkly, but he put his hands on her shoulders and started to knead them.

"I mean… You're panicking. You don't usually panic. Ever since we met with the Creatures—"

"Ever since we learned Nick is even deeper in this shit—in our lives—than we realized? Yeah. Yeah, I'm tense and I'm fucking angry and I want to kill him, Sash. Like… I'm fighting it. But my wolf… I want to eat him alive."

His eyes, always so piercing, locked on hers, and for the first time, she saw his wolf staring out of his human face—those eyes, predatory and intent.

Sasha swallowed and reminded herself it wasn't her he was angry with.

"Zev, you need to calm down."

"I know, I just—"

"We're going to talk about the whole Nick thing later because that's real and that's… something needs to happen there. But for now just because time is short… you're right about the bond. But I don't see how I can do anything else. I don't think the females will go with anyone else—especially not a male and there are no other females we can send."

"What about Kyelle?"

"She's got to take these females through for me because they need to be moving while we are—remember? We have to do this all at the same time. Besides, I told Vayl that I was coming—that's the word she's spread in case the Gateway opens when she's not around. They're all going to be looking for me."

Zev shook his head and his jaw was tight. "We can't do it, Sash. We have to bring the others in—I mean, we need to anyway. If something happens to one of us, we're both gone and they're all screwed. What if we go for the others and one of us has a heart attack and dies? Do they all just get left there? No, we can't risk it, Sasha, please. You have to promise me—"

"But how are we going to get to the new world without going through the Gateway?"

"We're going through it together," he said slowly, warily. "But that's why… that's why we can't risk everyone else on us."

"What are you talking about? You said—everyone said—we can't cross together."

"We can if one of us is out of it."

"What?"

"That's how I got you here. It's… fuck. So, it's how they bring through the Chimera when they're young, or if they're freaking out. We can enter together if one of us is unconscious. Remember when we arrived? I gave you too much of that stuff and you didn't wake up. It scared the shit out of me."

"Zev, I'm Alpha! I can't just get knocked out—what if I don't wake up and there's a need on the other side?"

"Sasha, please." His hands shook as he cupped her face. "If one of us dies, both of us die. We can't risk leaving everyone else without a leader. We need…. We need to establish the hierarchy, put it in place in case something happens to us, make sure they know who's in charge if we don't show up, and… and I need you to trust me to get you through—because you can't carry me."

Sasha's head spun. It was all too much, too many things. But no matter what angle she looked at it from, she realized he was right. Even if they went through separately, even if they survived that initial breaking… there was no guarantee they were both going to make it through this. She could step out of the gateway into the lab and get shot. She could end up stuck in the sanctuary by accident. Zev could get hurt—

She turned from that thought. "Okay… okay… so we need to bring in others to do this too. But that means… shit, Zev, that means we need to send them through and make sure they can even do it! What if the females won't listen to them, or they can't find the safe place? We have to send them through now—tonight—to test it before Nick and the humans are paying attention tomorrow!"

Zev nodded. "I know," he said, finally calm.

Sasha blew out a breath. "Well… I guess we better call our friends together," she said quietly. "And pray that the females will listen."

 

Chapter 399

An hour later they had Lhars, Kyelle, Skhal, Dunken, Jhon, and Yhet in a clearing near the village. Sasha had called them there because Skhal and Jhon were still at the village, and it was a much shorter walk to the Gateway when they were done.

Zev just prayed that they could all pull this off. He felt like the land was sliding out from under their feet and they were all just being borne along with it, their only choices to run and try and keep their feet, or be swallowed up.

He couldn't leave her side. Had stood just behind her while she explained to them what she'd done, and how she planned to get the females out of the compound—to their collective stunned disbelief. Despite his stress, Zev found himself thrumming with pride. She was amazing.

"But now… we're pretty sure that the humans are going to figure out that we're onto them," she said, her voice a little shaky. Zev put one palm to her shoulder, to let her feel him there. "I was going to do it myself—that's what the females are expecting. But we realized… there's just too much risk. I need three of you to go across and contact the different female groups—and Kyelle, I need you to make sure you can find the safe place. When we take the females through from here, I'm leaving you as Alpha."

Kyelle blinked. "I… okay?"

"And Zev and I… the bond is affected every time we go through. So we aren't confident we can get back and forth. That means we need three of you to go through, make sure you can find the females, and get a message to them from me. Warn them that we're coming the next day. They need to understand that it's not going to look the way I said it would—we need to know if they'll trust you enough to follow. Because if they won't… I'll have to risk it."

"No, Sasha," Yhet rumbled from behind the others.

Sasha smiled up at him but shook her head.

"We have about five hours," Sasha said, and Zev felt her shift her weight to press back against him a hair. "I need three of you to go and see if you can find the three groups of females I identified. Then cross to the safe place—but don't go through. You have to get back here before sunrise. We can't risk that Nick goes early—or that the humans come through looking for him and find you instead. They can't know that we're experimenting."

"I'll go," Yhet said immediately.

Sasha smiled sadly. "Actually, Yhet, I was hoping you could stay on this side and guard the Gateway for us—make sure Nick doesn't sneak through or something. I don't know. I just… I feel like we want to keep eyes on this end. And you can get back to us faster than anyone else."

"I can also crush a human," he said easily. "Okay, Sasha-don. Whatever you need."

Sasha blinked, but Zev grinned.

"I'll go," Lhars said quickly.

"Me too," Skhal added.

Sasha thanked them both, while Dunken and Jhon turned to stare at each other.

"You or me?" Jhon asked quietly. Zev blinked. He'd expected his friends to immediately step forward. It hadn't occurred to him that anyone wouldn't want to—

"She's here. I can't risk it," Dunken said. "I'll remain and do anything I can to help from this side, but… if you would be willing…"

Zev's mouth fell open. "Who's here?"

Dunken took a deep breath and turned to Zev. "I was going to tell you. I believe my mate is among the females that are here."

"What?!"

Exclamations rippled around the circle of friends. Dunken looked very uncomfortable.

"Who is it?!" Sasha gasped.

"I would… rather not say. She has not… shown any regard. I do not wish to…"

"It's fine, Dunken," Zev said quickly, motioning to Sasha to stop. She didn't know, Dunken had welcomed her quickly, for Zev's sake, but he was extremely reserved and private. And, Zev suspected, if he hadn't told Zev about it, there was something that concerned him about the bond.

"I'll go," Jhon said, drawing all the attention back to himself. Dunken looked relieved.

"Thank you, Jhon," Sasha said. "Now, the females won't be expecting you, and given the experiences we've had here, I'm going to ask you all to step very carefully in your communication with them. It's very important that they feel confident you were sent by me. So I'm going to send you all with a very specific message. It's so important that you relay it exactly."

Zev could smell her sudden ease and he frowned. "What message?"

Sasha looked up at him sheepishly. "So… when Nick took me to the main female camp in the compound, Vayl, the leader said they had a prophecy. And I wondered how that could be. But… when I went back through the Gateway and tried to reach them, Vayl and I spoke and she told me she knew I'd be coming because I'd already been there once before and given her instructions that when we met the next time, I wouldn't know her, and she wasn't to question that. She was to act as if we'd never met. That's how I realized the Gateway must cross time."

Zev's mouth dropped open.

"So, when I went back in, I asked the Gateway to take me to a time before I'd met Vayl that I could speak with her without the humans knowing. It led me around a small loop, then opened again, immediately. Vayl was shocked when she saw me—she didn't know who I was. It was summer and warm outside, very obviously a different time… so I told her I would be coming back and she wasn't to be surprised that I didn't recognize her or know her. That would be part of the miracle of this. But we were going to get her and the others out.

"She asked who I was as I was bout to leave and I told her that I was Zev's mate…. And the Alpha of the Chimera."

Zev almost fainted. "You… traveled time?" He trembled. She could have been lost! She could have come back to the wrong time! His hand tightened on her waist.

Sasha stared back at him, her eyes pleading.

Please don't be angry, she sent to his mind. Please, Zev.

 

Chapter 400

Sasha watched him nervously, praying he wouldn't get angry when he was already so tense. She saw him visibly swallow whatever it was he'd been about to say.

We're going to talk about this later, he muttered in her head.

Sasha sighed with relief and rubbed his arm, then turned back to the others.

"Okay, guys, so, here's how it works. When you step into the Gateway, you have to focus only on where you want to go. You can't let your mind wander, because the Gateway wants to take you where you want to be—if you start thinking about missing home, or you're worried about someone, you risk being dumped out in a place you can't get out of.

"Just to help you focus, I'm going to give each of you a description of a group of females and where they are in the compound. But you have to make it clear in your mind that if that group has moved from where I saw them, you want to be where they are—and where the humans can't find you. Don't forget that part! You aren't restricted by time. Maybe the Gateway opens to three days ago when they were alone, that's fine, it doesn't matter. You just need to get to them at a time when the humans can't see you and won't interfere. But when the Gateway opens, stay in the doorway of it—let yourself see them, and them see you, but don't step out because it will close and then you want to be able to get out—do you understand? No matter what, you can't actually step out of it. Because it doesn't open there naturally, you'll be stuck."

She took a deep breath, but they were all nodding. "So the first thing you tell them when you find them is that you were sent by Sasha, Alpha in Thana, and then you have to say, "The prophecy is coming true tomorrow. I'll be back to help you then." That's crucial!"

The males all nodded again, but Zev frowned. "What is this prophecy thing?"

"It's not a prophecy, it's just how we refer to it because the humans don't know I came through, and don't know the females are expecting to be saved this way. If you don't say that, they won't trust you…" Sasha trailed off, clawing a hand through her hair. "Honestly, they might not trust you anyway, but what choice do we have?"

Everyone's face got serious, but Kyelle looked sad and tense, her eyes kept flicking to Lhars next to her.

"Tell them that this was a test run to warn them. That they need to be ready. That after Nick returns tomorrow, we'll be back." She blew out a breath. "Then, when you've delivered the message, step back into the Gateway and tell it you want to see the safe place."

She hesitated then. "When the gateway leads you to the new place, you're just going to see it. I need you guys to see it. Let it open and show you—but don't step through. When it opened for me, it opened high in the air because I told it I just wanted to see it. But if I'd stepped out, I would have fallen to my death."

Beside her, Zev tensed again. She was going to have to do a lot of reassuring that night. She cleared her throat. Then, when you're certain you found it, come back. Please come back. We need you here to make all of this happen. We'll be working while you're gone to get everyone ready—and all day tomorrow. I'm afraid this is a night of no sleep for all of us. When you get into the gateway and you're coming home, make sure and tell it you have to be back before dawn? We can't risk Nick getting out there early, or… just we can't risk anything. Get back here while it's still dark, okay?"

When they'd asked their questions and everyone seemed to be clear on their jobs, Sasha assigned each of them a group of females to locate.

It was dangerous to have them all in there at the same time, but what else could they do? It was already after midnight, she was sure. They had to make sure these guys could do this without putting anyone else at risk. And they had to give everyone time to prepare.

"We'll use the time while Nick is gone to inform and organize everyone here, so even his guards are packed and prepared. Then we'll need to find a way to make sure he stays asleep when we all leave…" She looked at Zev who gave a dark smile.

"I can take care of that part."

Sasha gave him a warning look. "We need him alive. We need him to go back and tell the others that we've all gone. It makes it less likely that they'll come through here all guns blazing and kill what's left of the creatures.

"Sash, these people have no hearts, there's no point—"

"If I can save one of those males from getting hunted, I'm going to do it. We don't let Nick know, do you understand?!"

Zev growled but submitted, and the others did too when she turned to look at them.

She almost apologized for being so aggressive, but then she realized… none of them were mad.

They understood that she was leading. Sasha shook her head.

"Okay, so we need to get you guys out there. Kyelle, you come with us, I'll have you take a dry run to the safe place so you know where you're going when you have to help the females prepare, but you don't hang around in there. See the place, then get back, okay?"

Kyelle nodded, but her eyes were hollow, lines pinching at the sides.

Sasha sighed. "I know this sucks, being stuck here, but—"

"No, no!" Kyelle reassured her, though the smile she gave didn't reach her eyes. "I want to help the females. It's needed. Don't worry."

Sasha didn't miss that her eyes dropped, then slid to the side to look at Lhars, though.