Ch. 411..415: The Werewolf's Vampire Mate Chapter 411-415
Chapter 411: Worst nightmare
Rex
The minute I separate from Blue and Gyles, I feel empty.
I know this is something that we have to do--well, except the punishment.
this is something that I have been looking forward to all my life. I mean, I prayed to the goddess of the moon every day of my life. I prayed to find my mate. I prayed to have everything that others had.
I wanted love and companionship.
It was my heart’s desire and then, my prayers were answered. I got times two of Everything I had ever prayed for.
I got the love, times two.
I got the companionship, times two.
I got the mates, times two.
I got the family.
I got the life that I wanted.
I am grateful for everything I have, even with all the problems. I know that nothing is easy. Life is meant to be hard, love is meant to be hard, unless what is the point of it. What makes you appreciate it? What makes it all worth it, if it is easy?
I walk into the cave and it brightens from the light of the moon. I release a sigh of relief because I didn’t want to be in complete darkness. I have done my research on the punishment that is to come. I know what is going to happen. I know there are going to be a lot of mind games.
Tricks that will play a part in our greatest fears.
What am I really afraid of?
What is my biggest fear?
As much as I have thought about it, I still haven’t come up with the answer. The only thing I am afraid of right now is losing the two most important people in my life. It can’t be that easy.
I sit down on the ground and it is warm. I expected it to be so cold and unbearable. I have a lot of expectations that I know will never be what I think. I always think that things are going to be a certain way and they never are.
I look around the cave. It is so big and when I see the small entrance, I wonder if Blue and Gyles are okay. I wonder if they are going through what I am going through right. The unknown, wondering, waiting.
I feel an emptiness in my chest and it is scary. I know that whatever comes next, it is going to be something that none of us are prepared for. It is going to be a test.
I look around the cave again and I notice there are drawings on the walls. Instead of being scared, I feel intrigued. I get up and I walk over to the wall. I look at them and my eyes widen.
They are drawings of us. I look at them closely and I notice that there is a small note next to each of them. I go over to the one of Blue and I read it out loud.
I am going to take care of you. I am going to be your husband and I will love you and make sure that you are safe. I am going to protect you from the world and I will keep you safe. I am going to be everything you ever wanted. I am going to love you when you don’t love yourself. I am going to hold your hand when you are afraid. I am going to be your protector. I am going to be your best friend. I am going to be your everything.
I look at the one of Gyles and I read it out loud. My eyes start filling with tears as I read the words. I want to be yours; I want to love you. I want your heart, your smile, and everything else. Take me and you will never be alone again.
The words are so clear, I know that these are real thoughts from each of them because this is how they actually feel about me.
I turn to the last one, the one of me. The drawing starts to disappear and before it is gone completely, the words appear.
You are going to be alone.
I take a step back because it makes sense to me. This is the punishment. I am going to be alone, in absolute solitude. I didn’t think that it would be so easy. I thought that it would be something horrible. I thought that it would be something that would bring me to my knees. I thought I would be in pain but now, before it even starts, I already know what it is.
This is scary but also something I have kept to myself since I met Blue and Gyles.
I reach for the wall, wishing that it would come back, but once my hand rests on the wall of the cave, it shatters so fast that I close my eyes from all the dust. When I open my eyes, I am in a room, to be specific, I am in my room.
Alone.
Okay, this is all in my head.
This is not real; I know that much but it feels so real. The door opens and Blue walks in. He is dressed in the same clothes he had on before this all started. there is a beautiful smile on his face, which just makes me wish he was here with me for real right now.
"Hi baby,’’ he says, his voice is like music to my ears and he isn’t even talking to me. I watch him as he walks over to the bed, I didn’t even notice that anyone was on it before until Gyles sits up and stretches his hands out.
I watch them as they embrace. This is nothing new, I have seen them embrace so many times but this time feels different.
There is a part of me that has always had this feeling inside, now, the goddess is bringing it out and using it to get to me.
I start crying and I know that this is all in my head. It is only a matter of time before I am back in the cave, waiting for what is to come.
I walk over to the bed and I sit down. I watch them as they kiss and embrace each other, I watch as they start to take each other’s clothes off. I watch as they look happiest without me.
Chapter 412: Useless and weak
Rex
I know that this is all a trick, I know that this is all in my head but I can’t help but feel jealous. I can’t help but feel the way I feel. I can’t help but feel like I am not good enough.
I can’t help but feel like I am not what Blue and Gyles want. I can’t help but feel like I am not good enough for them. I have always had all these feelings inside me. From the day they met each other. There was this voice at the back of my mind, one that told me that I wasn’t the only one for them. I wanted to be the one they shared. I liked when I was in the middle of things and I know it is selfish and it is not something I have ever said out loud but it has been there and I hate that this is the fear the goddess decided to use.
I start to cry because I know that this is all in my head. I can’t help but think that this is the punishment. I can’t help but think that this is what it feels like to be completely alone.
I can’t help but think that this is what Blue and Gyles will do to me.
I can’t help but think that this is what they have always wanted.
I start to cry harder.
I think about all the fun things we have done together, all the fun things we have shared. All the time we have spent. I think about the way it felt when Blue kissed me for the first time. I think about all the fun we had.
I think about the way it felt when Gyles kissed me.
I think about the way I felt when they both kissed me at the same time.
"It is real." I breathe out through my tears. They are still on the bed, they are having sex, without me.
"What we have is real,’’ I say louder this time because I am not going to let this get to me. I know this is not real.
This will never be real.
"We have done it without you before, I mean, that is why you are here in the first place.’’ Blue turns to me and smiles, he sounds evil. This is not the man that I know.
This is something else, something darker, this is not real.
"We have done it before and we can do it again,’’ Gyles says, his voice is the same.
This is not real. The fact that they are talking to me means that they can see me. I thought I was just a fly in the wall and now that they are talking to me, I don’t want to have a conversation with them.
How am I supposed to accept that this isn’t real when they are looking at me with such intensity? when this all feels a lot real.
I look at my hands because I don’t want to look at them. I don’t want to hear what they have to say. I don’t want to cry in front of them. This is my punishment; I have to go through this if I want to get out and go back to them.
"This is a dream," I say and I know that I am making myself feel better.
"This is just a dream," I say louder this time. I know that this is the only thing I can do and I know that this is the only way that I can get back to them if I stand up for myself.
"This is just a dream,’’ I say louder again.
I am not going to let this get to me.
"You might think that this is a dream and maybe it is but you have to know that this is how we really feel. You are a burden, a weak omega. One that we don’t even want.’’ Blue mutters.
his words hurt.
This is not real.
I shake my head as his words get to me, I stand up from the bed because I want to be away from him and this situation. I would rather be in the cold cave alone, than watch the men I love, hate me. I walk over to the door and it opens easily. Maybe this is what I am supposed to do.
Leave this situation.
Show strength.
"Everyone is going to leave you, even your parents chose death over you,’’ Blue shouts just as I leave the room.
the door closes behind me and I am left alone in the dark. I stand there for a while and I am not sure what to do. I know that this is a dream and that I have to wake up but I can’t control it. The air around me is cold and I smell the faint scent of snow. There is a path just in front of me and I know that I am supposed to walk down it.
I start to walk and I try and focus on the fact that this is a dream but it is hard and the voice in the back of my mind is telling me that if I don’t wake up, I will be alone and this is real.
I can’t help but think about the way they looked at me.
They looked at me like I was a burden, they looked at me like I was useless.
The way they were talking to me was harsh and I can’t help but think that maybe it is the way they have always felt about me.
Shit, no, this is getting to me.
I am losing my fucking mind.
I stop at the end of the trail and I see a fire, one that is bright and somehow might bring warmth to my cold mind. I walk over to it and place my hands in front of it, rubbing them together.
For the first time, I can see my hands and they look so small. My hand is smaller than I thought.
Cause you are weak.
Blue’s voice is in my head again, and I don’t know how to get rid of the strange hate that is mixed with it.
"This is happening,’’ I hear a voice and turn in the direction. I don’t see anyone but the voice is so familiar that it makes my heart shudder. Slowly, the voice turns to footsteps and I see the person responsible for my heart trembles.
"Mom,’’ I call out as a tear rolls down my cheek.
Why is she here?
Chapter 413: Manipulation
Rex
I know this is another, can’t see me but I am here show. I know, the second, my father walks up to her and they sit down on the log of wood by the fire.
"Are you scared,’’ mom asks dad as he takes her hands in his. He shakes his head immediately "This is inevitable, we have to do this." he tells her calmly.
I don’t know what they are talking about, I don’t even know the significance of this. Like why am I here and why they are here.
"I know, I know that but we are basically going to our deaths,’’ she cries and he takes her in his arms. I watch them embrace and I wish I could hold them again. I wish I could tell them goodbye. I know what this is. The day before the war. The last day that I saw them.
"Dad,’’ I call out his name in a whisper. My heart is crying right now because I don’t even like to think about them. I remember all the times I shared with them but after their death, I shut it all out. I didn’t want to think about them because it hurt too much.
They turn to me and I see all the emotions on their faces. "This is not real, you are not here right now," I say knowing full well that they can’t hear me. I take a closer step towards them and I reach out because I want to touch her again.
want to hold her hand again. I want to feel her warmth again.
"You are going to die and I am going to live," I tell them knowing full well that they can’t hear me. I know that I am just talking to myself but I am hoping that they will hear me. I am hoping that they will say something, I just want to hear something.
I stand there for a while, just talking to them. but I know that it is pointless. The fire starts to intensify and in a split second, it reaches them. There is no way to stop it, there is nothing I can do as they start to scream.
The pain on their faces, the way they scream is so real.
The scream is real.
I can feel the tears fall because I know that I can’t do anything.
Is this my punishment, do I have to watch them die? I watched them die once, what is the point of this?
"No,’’ I scream with my hands on my head and my eyes closed. I am too weak to take this. I am too weak for this.
don’t want to feel this.
I open my eyes and they are gone. I can’t see them anymore; the fire is gone but I know that I am not alone. I can feel another presence. I open my eyes to see a man.
He is tall and has a dark beard and his eyes are a bright shade of blue. He is wearing all black, but it is a simple black. He is not wearing a fancy suit; he isn’t wearing something that makes him look like he is better than me. He is wearing the clothes of a hunter, something that I have never seen on him before.
I know this man.
"You are just a burden," he says as he gestures me to stand up.
I am not going to listen to him.
His words hurt and I don’t want to hear them. I don’t want to hear him. I am not going to listen to him. I am not going to listen to the only man that took care of me.
"Get up,’’ he tells me again.
This is Beau’s father.
Why is he here?
I can’t do this," I tell him as my hands are shaking.
he looks at me like I am nothing and I feel like I am nothing.
"Get up," he tells me again and this time he says it like I am so much weaker than him. I try to stand and I find myself falling back. I am weak, I am so weak. I can’t do this.
"You are weak," he tells me as he grabs my hand and before I know it, I am standing.
I am standing but my body is shaking. He doesn’t let go of my hand and I know that he is not going to. "This is your last chance, you can go back," he tells me as he looks me straight in the eyes.
I look at him, I try to understand what he is saying. I try to think about what he is saying. I try to think about this, what am I supposed to do?
"Do you want to go back?" he asks me.
I look at him and I think about it. I think about my life and I think about my parents and I think about what he is saying. I don’t know what he means by back.
does he mean, back with Blue and Gyles?
That has to be it...right?
I know that I can go back to them, I know that they are waiting for me. "You have two choices today,’’ he lets go of me and I fall to the ground. I don’t know why I can’t move.
"You can stay here and die or you can go back to your home."
I furrow my brows in confusion "What the fuck are you saying?’’ I ask him because he is not even making any sense.
"Do you choose to stay here with your parents, the only people that have ever really loved you or go back to Blue and Gyles, knowing full well that they will never love you the way you love them?"
I feel the tears fall from my eyes. What? What is he saying? The only people that have ever really loved me?
I don’t understand.
I don’t understand what he is saying. He is trying to manipulate me.
They love me.
They love me.
Chapter 414: Right choice
Rex
I know that they love me.
"I am not going to stand here and argue with myself, I am not going to stand here and listen to you say all the things that you are saying right now. I know Blue and I know Gyles. They will never leave me.’’ I tell him because, at the back of my mind, I already know that this is not real, I know everything because I studied the punishments in the library in the community.
There is a lesson to learn and so far, I have not seen what it is.
I am being tricked into thinking that my mates don’t want me but I already know that they do. Yeah, sometimes, I feel excluded from them but I know that Gyles is going through shit and Blue is stronger than I am. He is better for comforting and that might be why Gyles would lean on him.
But that doesn’t make them love me less.
They love me.
"You think that they will never leave you,’’ he tells me and I want to scream at him.
"I have seen everything; I have seen every possible outcome and I want you to really think about this. I want you to really think about what your life will be if you go back with them. You know what? I could show you, all mind tricks aside. I will take you to the future, the one where you choose them. Let’s go,’’ he tells me and the fire reappears.
The flames are so bright.
I can feel the heat but I know that I am not burning.
I look at him and he smiles. "You will see everything, you will see the truth," he tells me and I don’t know if I want to see the truth--fuck, I know that the truth is all a made-up lie. The flames start to move and I see them, I see my mates inside the fire. It is like a video playing in front of me.
I watch Blue and Gyles, they are happy, they are laughing. I watch them as they embrace each other.
"No, I should be with them. Where am I?’’ I turn to him but his focus is on the fire. This is a lie that I will never believe. One that he is trying to convince me of but I will never listen to him.
You are looking at the future, the one that you choose. Look closely, pay attention because this is what you will be choosing,’’ he tells me and I want to tell him that I don’t believe this.
In a flash, I see myself. I am unlike them because I am alone and sad. I see myself as a human, I see myself as a wolf. I see everything that he wants me to see but I know that it is not true.
"Do you still choose them?’’ he asks me and I look at him and I look at the fire.
I know exactly what I am supposed to say. "Yes, of course, I do. I want to stay with them.’’ I tell him and I want to laugh because I know that this is not the future.
"You are making the wrong choice," he tells me as the fire burns even brighter.
I want to look away from it, I want to look at him. "What other choice is there? Why would I ever choose death over the people that love me the most? They are my family; they are my mates. I will always choose them."
The fire continues to grow, it is so bright and I know that this is not the future. This is a lesson and the lesson is not over. "You are making the wrong choice," he tells me again.
I look at him and I want to scream. I want to tell him to leave, I want to go back to being alone. I would rather be alone than with him right now. I don’t need him to try and convince me. Even if this is the future, I would still choose them. I would still love them with all my heart.
No matter what happens.
The fire starts to dim and I think that this is over until he says one thing. "This is your last chance; do you really want to stay with them?’’ he asks me and I look at him.
"I will always choose them, no matter what happens. I will make the right choice and I will choose them," I tell him and the fire disappears, I am back in the cave again. I smile because I want this to be the end of the torture.
I am seated on the floor with my back against the wall. I walk over to the part of the walls that had drawings on them and it is just like it was before the cracks with the engravings on them. I look to the drawing of me and this time, the note is clear as day. I read the words and a smile sprawls on my face.
I read them again and I laugh because I knew all along.
"I am going to choose you, Blue and Gyles. I am going to choose you and I will never make the wrong choice."
Nothing else matters now but them. I just have to wait for them to get through theirs. I have to wait until I can be in their arms again.
I miss them so much. I go back to the ground and sit down gently because there is nothing else to do but wait.
I just wish I wasn’t so alone right now.
"You are not alone,’’ I hear its voice before I see the shadow of my wolf as it walks over to me.
The smile that is already on my face widens as I reach for him, taking him in my arms.
"I am here with you,’’ he reminds me because I completely forgot.
I have never been alone.
Chapter 415: Farewell
Gyles
Being alone sucks but I mean, this is all my fault. I am the one that got us in this mess like I always do.
If I didn’t have sex with Blue, we would be together for the mating ritual but of course, if I don’t mess things up, then something must be up. The mating ritual was supposed to be this romantic event that would make us closer but now I have to get through this punishment. I have to do my own part alone and I don’t know how I will manage that.
Apparently, I am the weakest out of the three of us, the one that always causes trouble. I don’t even know how Blue and Rex have been able to handle me, I can’t even handle me sometimes.
Maybe being here is better than being in the outside world. Having to deal with ghosts and Analise. I don’t know how we are going to survive all that.
So here I am, in a dark cave all alone and it is supposed to be a punishment that we might not be able to bear. So far, nothing has happened, I don’t know how long I have been here but it is starting to feel like an eternity.
I look around and the only light is coming from the moon so I look up at the sky and take deep breaths. meditating seems like a good escape from my reality. I don’t want to overthink things but my mind is a mess right now.
I keep thinking about what could possibly happen. I keep wishing this makes me stronger than I am right now. I want to be able to protect them. I want to be the hero in our trio but I don’t know if that will ever happen.
I have been useless so far in our whole lives together.
I feel a slight tingling in my chest and I look at the entrance of the cave. I stand up and try to walk towards it but something keeps me in place. I look down and I see a small, pink light glowing from my chest. I look up again and I see a small figure at the entrance of the cave. it has a small light around it and I can see it smiling at me. I look at my chest again and I see it glowing more.
The small figure comes closer to me and I see something flying towards me. It is a small animal with a weird light around it. It looks like a small deer but it is not. It hits me in the chest and I am instantly being pushed back. I hit the cave wall and I fall to the ground. The light around me stops shining and I am now in the darkness again, like it was before the little light approached me.
I look at my chest and I see two small cuts on my skin, exactly where the light was. I put my hand over them and I can feel something warm. I look at my hand and I see a small amount of blood on it. I am not sure if it is my blood or the animals, but I can feel my skin healing itself.
I look around and I see the animal lying on the ground. It seems dead. I get up and walk towards it and I see it is not dead. It is sleeping. I try to touch it but I can’t. I get my hand close to it and the animal starts to glow like it did before it hit me. I take my hand away and the animal starts to move. It gets up and this time, I follow it. The faster it runs, the brighter its light becomes. I don’t know what is happening but it feels like I need to go with the flow like this is the only way I can get through this.
The animal takes me to the entrance of the cave and looks back at me. It has a sad look on its face and then it turns around and starts running. I chase after it but I can’t keep up. The animal stops and turns back to me, it seems to be smiling at me, and then it turns around again and keeps running. I follow it and finally, I catch up to this mystery animal.
I look at it and I see its wings. suddenly, I am looking at a glowing bird. It was just a deer a couple of minutes ago. I have no clue what I should do. I watch it with so much uncertainty and confusion. There is something about this bird that feels familiar.
The bird comes closer to me and I can feel its feathers against my hand. I close my eyes and I feel safe now. I hear it cawing at me and I open my eyes. It is gone.
I am looking at the moon and I see a lot of birds flying around it in this beautiful path. I look at the ground and I see a few small feathers around me, almost like their farewell. I know it doesn’t make any sense. I am probably losing my mind. Before I can even blink, I realize, I am not alone.
"All those people died because of you,’’ I turn to the voice, and my heart races in my chest from fear and pain.
I can’t breathe. I just stare at the man in front of me. I shake my head because I don’t want this. Anyone but him.
I can’t deal with this reminder.
No.
The smile on his face is haunting in a very condescending way. I know that this is not real because he is dead and I am supposed to be serving some kind of punishment. Maybe this is my punishment.
Of course, he would be my punishment, this all my sense now.
Who else could it be?
Fucking hell.