Ch. 141..150

Ex-Husbands Regret Chapter 141-“What? It’s true and I am so proud of you” He gives me a mischievous smile and I just know he got me right where he wanted me.

“Can I play video games then since I’m a math genius?” I just knew it. He has been battering me up.

I sigh. “Fine, but only for an hour” He rushes up the stairs screaming thank you over and over again making me smile in the process.

“Hey, Maria. You’re free to leave” I tell our nanny as I walk into the kitchen.

“Are you sure?” “Yes. Now go” She smiles at me before taking her things. Fifteen minutes later she’s gone and I wish I hadn’t insisted on her to leaving.

With Noah in his room. I was alone. I had nothing to occupy my mind and so my thoughts started running rampant.

I was just contemplating starting dinner early when my front door opened.

“Yoohoo. Ava where are you?” Letty voice brings a smile to my face.

“In the kitchen” I shout back.

Minutes later, she walks into the room and I am surprised to see Corrine following behind her.

“Look who I found. We got here at the same time” Letty says sitting at the kitchen island.

I’d told Letty how Corrine stood up for me against Anita. She has immediately liked her, reasoning that anyone who stood up for me was worth her respect.

“What are you doing here?” I ask Corrine.

“Well, you gave me an inch at the restaurant and I thought to myself, she’s ready. I’ve always wanted to be your friend, so here I am.” There was this part of me that was sceptical. It wanted to shut her off. Instead I push it back. It was time I stepped pushing people away.

“Well, welcome to my humble home” She smiles and I smile back at her. Genuinely happy that she was here.

“I came for an entirely different reason. Have you seen the gossip column? It was posted like an hour ago” Letty asks.

“No. Why?” She hands me a phone and I read the caption. With each word I read, my mood sours.

[Billionaire Rowan Woods seen going on a lunch date with ex–wife, Ava Sharp months after their divorce and weeks after rumours of him dating her elder sister, Emma Sharp] Below was a picture of Rowan escorting me to the restaurant with his hand on my lower back.

“Shit” I curse. “This is going to cause unnecessary drama” Emma was going to shit a brick. I wasn’t afraid of her, but I just didn’t want trouble. The image portrayed a certain intimacy that wasn’t truly there. Anyone looking at it was going to think that there was something more between us.

“Is there something going on that I’m unaware of?” Letty asks as Corrine just stares between the two of “Nothing. He unexpectedly showed up at my appointment and then asked me if we could talk over lunch” after that I recount everything that happened. Including his apology.

When I am done, I am even more confused than I was before. Things were just not making sense no matter which angle I tried looking at it from.

“What if he is genuinely sorry?” Letty asks.

That is a question I kept asking myself since he apologized. I kept pushing it to the back of my mind because I was just not strong enough to deal with it right now.

1 don’t know” I sigh in defeat. “Forgiveness is something that has to be earned and so far he has done nothing to earn it. All he has managed to do is leave me with confusion and more unanswered questions” Honestly, how can I move past everything? He has spent the last nine years drilling into me that he hates my F***ing guts and now all of a sudden he’s sorry?

+15 BONUS His quick three hundred and sixty degree turn just doesn’t seem genuine. There is no way someone can change that fast.

“What do you think Corrine?” Letty asks her since she had been too quiet.

“I think these are the actions of a man who doesn’t know he’s in love” At that I burst out laughing. “That’s a good one Corrine. Rowan doesn’t love me” I mean come on, he said as much on that day he came bulging into my house, avenging his lovely Emma. 1 “Think about it though” she insists.

“She may be onto something. I mean why would he all of a sudden start caring for you? It doesn’t make sense unless he already cared for you but never realized. And again why does he suddenly want to be around you now that you’re divorced? Corrine may be right. He may have been in love with before and it took losing you for those feelings to come to the surface” you long I didn’t want to listen to their nonsense. So instead of answering their questions, I change the subject.

They don’t push it and I am thankful for that.

Everything after that is perfect. I have a great time with both of them. Knowing very well that now Corrine was part of our inner circle.

Even though everything was great, I couldn’t help thinking of what they said.

Rowan can’t possibly be in love with me. They had to be wrong because Rowan has only ever loved one woman and her name is Emma Sharp.

Ex-Husbands Regret Chapter 142-Today was a chilled day. I didn’t have much to do. Noah was already at school, and I was here at home just relaxing.

After my mental breakdown, I decided to take some much needed break from work. My students weren’t happy about it, but they understood that I hadn’t been myself the last couple of weeks.

I planned to resume after I give birth. My focus now was my kids and the Hope Foundation.

I’m still trying to come to terms with all that happened these past few weeks.

Including everyone’s change in behaviour.

The only one who seemed to be consistent with her hateful personality was Emma. The rest seem to have had an overnight change of heart.

Instead of focusing on those thoughts. I push them away and pick up my phone and dial mom’s number.

She picks up on the first ring.

“Hey mom” I greet her, I wasn’t completely used to calling her that, but I was slowly getting there.

“Aval” She screams through the phone, always excited to hear from me. “Theo, my love, our darling daughter is on the phone“.

I hear shuffling before a sort of echo fills the phone. I just know that she’s put me on loudspeaker.

“Hey dad” I greet him too.

Their love honestly fascinated me. They were together since they were thirteen and they’re still together years down the line. More than thirty–five years later.

If I was still chasing after love, then their kind of love is what I would have been looking for. Instead, I’ve accepted that love is just not for me. I’m now set and prepared to spend the rest of my life alone.

Hey darling, how are you doing?” I’m doing good. Not much going on. I just wanted to check up on you guys“, till haven’t told them that I am pregnant.

Even though I’m starting to show, It’s easy for me to hide my bump with oversized t–shirts. I just didn’t know how to tell them given that Ethan was still refusing their visits.

know deep down it hurts them even though they try hiding it As for Ethan. What he’s doing to them is wrong, but I also understand where he is coming from.

+15 BONUS He feels ashamed. He feels like he doesn’t deserve their love after what he did.

He was hiding from them because he felt like he didn’t deserve their kindness.

I sent him the picture of my recent ultrasound. He wrote back and told me he was thankful. He couldn’t stop saying how he was dying to meet his baby. He was also okay with waiting till the day I deliver to know the gender of our baby.

“Ava?” Mom calls, pulling me back to the present.

“Sorry. I zoned out a bit” I murmur embarrassed.

“It’s okay darling. I just wanted to know if you’ll be coming this weekend like we had talked about “Yes, though Noah won’t be joining us this time. It’s his weekend with his father so it’ll just be me and your guys“.

The Woods and the Sharp family used to have a monthly get together. I wasn’t always invited.

When I did get an invitation which was rare, I was treated like I didn’t exist. Like I didn’t matter. I wast completely ignored and was treated like a pariah.

The only one who used to talk to me during the gatherings was Noah. Most of the time, I ended up leaving early or crying in the bathroom.

There hasn’t been a get together in months. I guess now that the parents are back, they were back to having them.

“It’s a bummer that he won’t come but I am still happy that you’ll make it” dad says.

I was about to say something, but something takes my focus away. I hear a bark then a scratch. At first, I think I’m imagining things since there aren’t any dogs in the area. That is until I hear it again.

“Let me call you guys back, dad, I have to check on something” I tell him distractedly.

“Okay honey hang up and move to where the sound seemed to be coming from. Going to the backyard I find a large Siberian Husky on my small kitchen garden. It had uprooted everything that I had planted. There was nothing left except a whole mess.

tare in shock. My mouth hanging wide open.

how long it took me to plant those, and you just ruined every single one fu He looks chastised. Laying on the ground, giving me puppy eyes, but I wasn’t going to buy it.

“I wanted organic food, that’s why I started the damn garden in the first place and let me tell you, it took a lot of time and effort.” He whines, but I am too far gone to listen to him.

“Oh no, no, no. You’re not going to get out of this by flashing your cute, adorable eyes.” Shaking my head I stare at him. Atleast I assume it’s a he. “How are you going to make up for the damage, huh?” The more i stare at him, the more my heart begins to melt. He is big, fluffy and completely adorable. Hel had thick black and white far and piercing grey eyes.

For some weird reason they reminded me of Rowan and Noah’s grey eyes.

Ex-Husbands Regret Chapter 143-Never in my life have I seen a person’s heart melt so fast when it comes to my dog. Most people usually find him annoying as hell” the warm voice makes me whip my head so fast, I almost break it in the process.

Holy smokes. The man was hot this close up. Black hair, green eyes, high cheekbones, a chiselled jaw line, lps that begged to be kssed and a b*dy that enticed you to do dirty things. He was freaking hot and he knew it.

I know what you’re thinking. ‘Slow down Ava, you got fooled once by great looks, don’t make the same mistake again‘.

I wasn’t. I swore off love and men, but that doesn’t mean that I can’t appreciate a fine specimen when I see one. I’m not blind.

“Have we met before?” The words tumble out of my mouth before I can stop them. “It’s just that you look familiar“.

He stares for a while before answering. “Yes, we used to go to the same school, you were two years behind me“.

I I try to remember him, but it still doesn’t ring much of a bell. Probably because I was so obsessed with Rowan that I didn’t see anyone else.

“Calvin Garcia” he supplies when I still continue staring at him confused.

The moment he mentions his name, it hits me.

“Oh my goodness, you’re Nerdy Cal” for some weird reason, I shriek this.

He groans at the name he used to go by when he was in school. He glares at me, but it doesn’t faze me at all.

Wow, you had a big F***ing glow up” I stare at him dumbfounded.

The Cal I remember was skinny, with too wide glasses that kept slipping down his nose. He had braces and his face used to be covered in big red pimples.

He was also a nerd, spent most of his time studying in the library while others his age were busy F***ing in the janitor’s closet.

To simply put it, he wasn’t someone you would look at twice.

He looked good now. Really good. I am glad that everything worked out for him.

He changed into someone any woman would die to have. He was now in the same category as Rowan.

“Yeah, well, thanks” he says awkwardly.

“I also remember you used to have a massive crush on Emma, how did that crush turn out for you?” I teased. I wasn’t trying to be mean or anything.

When he wasn’t studying, just like all the other boys, he was busy following Emma around like a lost puppy.

The only problem was that Emma had eyes for Rowan only. When they started dating, they were the it couple.

Every boy except Gabe and Travis wanted to be in Rowan’s shows. Every girl wanted to be in Emma’s shoes.

“And you loved Rowan, how did that turn out for you?” He fired back in irritation.

“Touché” I murmur.

The pain was still there, but I managed to push it away.

I didn’t know Cal that way, but I thanked God on his behalf. Thanked him for looking after Cal, happy that he never got a chance with Emma.

Emma’s love for Rowan would have destroyed him, just like Rowan’s love for Emma destroyed me.

“Dad, can I watch TV?” The sweet voice pulls me from my bitter memories.

I turn to find a cute boy standing behind Cal. He had the same captivating green eyes as his father.

I “Hi, my name is Ava” I just couldn’t help myself.

“Hello” he says shyly, and my heart immediately falls in love with him.

“What’s your name?” I ask him gently.

Gunner 1 have a son about your age, his name is Noah. How about you come over and meet him when he gets out of school? He’ll be excited to have a new friend.” I pause before adding. “If it’s okay with your dad, that is see him looking up at Cal. A silent conversation passes between them, before Cal sighs in defeat.

simply says I stare at him. My eyes focused on his. I was trying to decode him, and I wasn’t ashamed of that. There was something in his eyes that called out to me.

He shifts uncomfortably. “Well I’m sorry that Rex ruined your garden. I’ll get someone to come tomorrow and fix it“.

So the husky was called Rex? It sort of fitted him.

“Rex” Cal called him, and he immediately went to his owner.

uch a very wide After he gives me a nod and Gunner gives me a smile, they leave my backyard through a very opening that I have never noticed before.

I stare at their backs as they walk to their house. It’s only after they’ve left, and I’ve been standing there like an idiot that I realize what I saw in his eyes.

I saw pain. I saw hurt. I saw a wounded soul In his eyes, I saw the same kind of darkness that I have been trying to run away for years without much cuccess.

In him, I saw a kindred spirit.

I Even as all these revelations flooded my mind, I couldn’t help but wonder what had caused him such pain.

Ex-Husbands Regret Chapter 144-Noah, are you done with your homework?” I call, but I don’t get an answer.

It was Friday afternoon and I was dead tired on my feet. I had forgotten when you’re pregnant how easily you get tired. Every single thing tired me out.

The only thing I’m grateful for is that I never experienced morning sickness unlike when I was pregnant with Noah.

“Noah?” I call him again.

I wonder what the hell he is doing. I usually get an answer immediately. Unless something has caught his attention and distracted him.

Before I can carry my tired b*dy to go upstairs to check on him, my doorbell rings.

I release a heavy sigh. It’s not that I didn’t want to see anyb*dy, I just wanted to take a break. Maybe have a long bath.

I spent the whole day at the Hope Foundation going through tons of documents that needed my attention. My eyes were dry, My mind was burnt out and my b*dy was aching all over.

Dragging myself, I open my door and I am surprised to find Calvin and Gunner at my doorstep. It’s been two days since that day in my backyard.

When Gunner didn’t show up when Noah got back from school, I assumed that maybe Calvin didn’t want anything to do with us. After all, he was really grumpy during our whole encounter.

“Hi” shock was clearly in my voice and I couldn’t hide it.

“Hi Miss Ava” Gunner tells me sweetly with a smile. “These are for you” It’s then that I notice he has a bouquet of flowers. Pink roses to be exact. He hands them to me and I take them gratefully.

Thank you Gunner. These are beautiful” Without thinking, I bend down and k*ss his cheeks.

When I straighten, he gives me a shy smile. Just like with Noah, I could already tell that Gunner was a sweet boy.

Ishift my eyes to his father, “Would you like to come in?” He looks hesitant at first, but when Gunner pulls his hand, he agrees.

I lead them straight to the kitchen where I had been baking cookies and cupcakes. Noah had requested for them and though I was tired, I couldn’t refuse him.

“You’re just in time to eat some goodness” I tell them as the oven timer pings.

I look for a vase and place the beautiful flowers Gunner brought me.

“Noah” I call again as I place some cookies in front of our guests.

“I’m coming mommy” he shouts back.

I hear his bedroom door close. Then his footsteps as he runs down the hallway and then the stairs.

Seconds later, he breaks through the kitchen door. He comes to a stop when he sees that we have visitors.

ding next to m 1. me.

“Come, my love. I want you to meet someone” he hesitantly takes a step until he’s standing Noah is a bit shy at first glance. That is before you get to know him better. When he sheds his shyness, you won’t even believe that he’s the same boy. He’ll talk your ear off.

“Noah, this here is Gunner. He lives next door and Gunner, this is my son Noah.

He’s the one I was telling you about” If I’m being honest, I thought things will be awkward between them at first, but I am wrong.

Gunner smiles “Hi” “Wanna play in my room?” Noah asks at the same time.

“Sure” With that, Noah grabs a bunch of cookies and hands them to Gunner. Then he goes to the pantry and get a couple of juice boxes.

ey walk “Come on, I’ve got a new game to show you” Noah says as they walk off.

I was super surprised by his actions. I thought it would take a bit of pushing to get him to warm up to Gunner, I guess I didn’t need to.

“Well that went well, I’m surprised Gunner made the first move. He’s usually really reserved” Calvin breaks. the silence.

face him. I had completely forgotten that he was even there.

Noah is like that too at first. He has to get comfortable with someone first Really? Then he’s much better off. When I say that Gunner is reserved I mean, he likes his own company. He doesn’t like making friends or meeting new people. Even in school, he keeps to himself” “Seriously?” I ask shocked.

“Seriously. At this point I think Rex and I are his only friends” I frown at that. I wasn’t a child psychologist but I was a teacher. Even I knew that that wasn’t typical behaviour for a child his age.

For a child to be that withdraw, then there is probably a problem. I know it doesn’t lie with Calvin. You just have to take one look at them to know they adore each other.

Something else was wrong. If Gunner is as withdrawn as Cal says, then something’s made him that way.

Ex-Husbands Regret Chapter 145-Hopefully Noah can get him out of his shell” I mumble, handing him a cupcake.

I round the island. Taking one of the barstools, I exhale in relief that I was off my feet. I dig into one of the cupcake. My mind completely empty.

“I wanted to apologize” Calvin says after a while.

“For what?” “Coming off as rude the other day.”

I Waving my hands dismissively, I face him. “In your defence, I was being too extra, so don’t worry about it” Talking about that day reminds me of the pain I saw in his eyes. Right now he has done a good job of trying to hide it.

Others may assume he’s okay, but I can tell he is not. I recognize the struggle in his soul because I usually go through the same thing.

It’s easy for someone who’s been hurt to see the pain others are trying to hide.

Especially if it’s the same type of pain that you yourself are experiencing.

“So what do you do for a living?” He asks, probably trying to make small talk.

“I’m a teacher, but I’m on leave for the next few months” I had thought about going back, but I decided against it. Even though I was bored being home alone, I knew I needed this time to myself. Not only because of the pregnancy, but also because of my mental state.

“So you got together with Rowan? Noah is his doppelgänger. It’s so uncanny” At that I snort. “Everyone in this damn city knows what happened with Rowan. I didn’t get with him. It was a drunk night gone wrong” I sometimes curse that night when I think of how my life would have been different if it wasn’t for my obsession. Then I remember that if it wasn’t for that night, then I wouldn’t have Noah. In the end I’m left wishing it didn’t happen, but thankful because I got someone precious from it.

“What happened?” Cal asks curiously.

clump up. Feeling myself start to sweat. “That’s a story for another day. Right now I don’t want to relieve I haven’t heard from Rowan since the day he showed up at my appointment which was three days ago.

I also haven’t gotten any surprise visits from Emma demanding I stay away from her man. I think Rowan is probably too busy trying to do damage control with Emma and for that I am grateful.

I didn’t want him around me because when he is, he confuses things. His recent behavior is messing with my head and I’m tired of trying to figure him out, “What about you? Where’s your wife” he was the same age as Emma so I assume he’s married.

“I don’t have a wife” “Okay…where’s Gunner’s mom?” I see pure undulated pain flash in his eyes. The kind of pain that isn’t yours, but you still feel it all the way to your soul. My heart aches for him, because I know how such pain can be consuming… “S–she’s not in the picture” he stammers in a broken voice. A voice filled with pain and a bit of anger. 2 Fuck. I feel the need to comfort him, but I am not sure it will be welcomed.

“I’m so sorry to hear that” I whisper feeling terrible for asking because I drenched up his pain.

I can’t imagine losing a spouse. I can’t imagine living the life you imagined alone knowing the love of your life isn’t there with you.

Calvin looks like the kind of man who loves deeply. If you love deeply then the loss is also just as deep.

The loss becomes all consuming.

Now I know where his pain originates from. He wasn’t hurt by someone. He lost someone he deeply loves.

He breathes out. Trying to once again bury his pain. “It’s okay. She hasn’t been in the picture for a while and I’m slowly learning to live with it” I grab his hand and squeeze. Giving him the comfort he clearly needs.

Changing the subject into something lighter, I ask him if he would help me plant my garden again since he didn’t send anyone to fix what Rex’destroyed.

After talking to him, I realize why Gunner is withdrawn. Losing a parent at such a young age isn’t easy and some children never recover from it.

I didn’t know them well, but right there and then I promise myself that I will be there for them. I was going to help them.

We all need happiness and joy in our lives and from the looks of it, Calvin and Gunner haven’t had it in a

Ex-Husbands Regret Chapter 146-Rowan Today we were having our monthly get together. The Woods and the Sharps have made this a tradition since I was about five years old.

Our families have always been close. Mainly because our mother’s have been best of friends since they were little girls.

It made logical sense that their children would end up being best friends too and that both families would

be close.

“Dad, why are you driving so slow? You’re going to make us miss grandpa’s barbecue stake” Noah complains, his brows pulled together in irritation.

If it wasn’t for Noah, I wouldn’t even have gone. I used to love them. Especially when I knew that Aval wasn’t going to be around. When I knew that she wasn’t invited.

I used to think it was the only place I could escape her. That being in a room where everyone except Noah. hated her guts was the best place to be.

Now though, it doesn’t F***ing feel like that anymore. Instead I hate myself and the rest for the pain we have put her through.

I’m going as fast as I can“I answer him.

“No, you’re not. You’re driving slower than a ninety year old grandma!” He huffs in annoyance.

Did I just get fried by an eight year old boy? I shake my head and chuckle before increasing the speed just a little bit.

The moment silence reigns in the car, my mind immediately goes to Ava.

She looked F***ing radiant when she opened the door for me.

To me she looked like a damn fertility goddess in a white flowing dress, long curled thick hair, her small baby bump and her beautiful flawless skin.

I was shocked by my reaction when I wanted nothing more than to take her in my arms and lock purselves in her bedroom for hours.

reaction to her is something that has never happened before and it took me by surprise.

haven’t been able to think about anything or anyone except for her. She’s stuck on my mind and nothing I It F***ing scares me how obsessed I am with her. It’s not once or twice that I found myself wondering what she’s up to. Whether she’s eaten or not. Or whether she’s getting enough sleep. I keep wondering if i should hire someone to help her around the house.

Those thoughts shake me to my core. I’ve never been one to take on more when it comes to Ava. Now, the need to take care of her is almost consuming and it’s wrecking havoc inside me.

“Dad?” Noah calls.

“What?” “We are here” I had not realized that we were already parked outside my parent’s house. I don’t know how we F***ing got here. I was so lost in my mind that I had been driving mindlessly.

I know how F***ing dangerous that is. Especially when I have Noah in the car with me, but I just can’t help myself. Thoughts of Ava keep consuming me.

“Come on, I’m sure your grandpa has saved some stake atmosphere away. 2 for you” I say just so I can push the awkward “Are you okay dad?” He asks instead of getting out of the car.

I I didn’t like that I was worrying him. I also couldn’t tell him my beautiful mother.

“Yes. I just have a lot on my mind, but it’s nothing to worry about” Problem was in the form of his He nods his head and unbuckles his seatbelt. We get out at the same time.

Locking the car, we walk towards the house. The door opens before we can get “Ma!” Noah shouts before running to her.

I’ve missed you my Noah” She bends down and catches him as his b*dy collides with hers.

It has always been obvious that Kate and James love Noah despite what happened with Ava.

Everyone loves Noah, we just didn’t love Ava because of the sin we thought she had committed against me and Emma re’s your mom? I sent her an invite” She asks, straightening and looking behind us.

“Oh, she’s not coming,” Noah informs her. “She went to visit grandma Nora and grandpa Theo. She was excited. We didn’t get to see them last week because they were on a business trip” Noah doesn’t seem to notice, but I do.

I see the moment Kate’s face falls. The moment pain flashes in her eyes. This has to be painful for her knowing that Ava was building a relationship with her biological parents and that no matter what she tries, she will never have a close relationship with Ava.

She had burned her bridges. Hurt Ava too much for her to forgive and accept her. Ava wanted nothing to do with the Sharps or the Woods.

Ex-Husbands Regret Chapter 147-The reason I was even still in her life was because I was Noah’s dad and also because I was being forceful. Otherwise, she would have tossed me in the cold like she has done with the rest.

“Maybe next time then” Kate gives him a sad smile.

She was on the brink of tears. About to lose it. Noah didn’t know the drama that was going on. I couldn’t let him see his grandma breakdown in front of him. He will start to question things and once he finds out the truth of how Ava has been treated, he will blow.

Noah was loyal to his mom above anyone else. If he finds out how cruel we’ve been to instantly be considered his enemies and he will cut us off.

va, we w “Let’s go…I’m sure the rest are waiting for us” I walk towards them and gently push them inside the house.

Kate excuses herself and goes to the bathroom while Noah and I move to the backyard.

I internally groan when I realize everyone has shown up. Noah runs ahead leaving me back.

He greets everyone except Emma. He doesn’t even spare her a F***ing glance.

He doesn’t like her and he isn’t afraid of showing it.

“So glad you’re finally here son” my dad claps me on the back.

He knows it irritates me when he does that, but he still does it.

“Yes” I mumbled already wanting this whole thing to be over and done with.

“You sure sound excited being around family” Gabe says sarcastically.

I glare at him. He doesn’t even flinch. Maybe it’s because he is my twin, but he is the only one who doesn’t cower at my glare.

“Come on, Rowan. Give me a hug” mom says smiling at me. “I’ve missed you” I wrap one hand around her waist and hug her to me. “Missed you too” We separate just as Kate comes back. Her eyes red and face blotchy.

Noah was already at the table with a plate chatting with Trevor, He had invited Letty, but she declined. She didn’t want to be around people who hurt Ava.

Her friendship and loyalty to Ava was causing waves in their relationship. Trevor was so F***ing afraid of losing her since he was among those that really hurt her friend. The only things that was standing “Can I talk to you, Rowan Emma’s voice penetrates my ears.

Fuck. I had not noticed her approaching me.

“There really isn’t anything to talk about” I say facing her.uh I have been avoiding her. I was still mad as hell about all the shit she said about Noah. More than that I just didn’t want her around me. Not when all I can think about is Ava.

I had loved the woman in front of me. Cherished her even when I was married to her sister. I was so F***ing sure there was no one else for me except Emma.

All I had wished was for her to come back. I had sworn that the moment she did and she accepted to give me a chance, I would divorce Ava and make a life with her.

She’s been back for months. Yet I can’t find the love I had for her. The love that I had thought was eternal. The love I had sworn no other woman would have.

I feel like a fool. One minute I’m professing my love for Emma and the next I don’t want her near me. One minute I’m sure I hate Ava with all my heart and the next, I can’t stay away from her.

Everything about the two sister was doing my head in “Rowan..” “What?” I snap feeling suffocated.

I see tears fill her eyes, but for some reason I just don’t give a damn anymore.

Not like I used to.

Without giving her another look, I turn around and walk away.

For a while I played the what if game. What if I could finally have the woman I’ve always loved? What if we got married and started a family? What if everything played out the way it was supposed to years ago?

Those questions rang in my mind for years and the weeks when Emma arrived.

I thought that this was our second chance at our love, but I had been wrong.

Emma and I were too different right now. We would never work and even if we did get together years ago there is no guarantee that we would have been end game.

She’ll always have a part of my heart as my first love, but it was time to accept the truth. My love for her is dead. It has probably been dead for years.

Ex-Husbands Regret Chapter 148-My head was swirling with the new revelation. I always thought my love for Emma was eternal. Realizing that it wasn’t, was doing things to my head and heart.

Imove quickly and sit down next to Noah. Now more than ever I wanted this whole thing over. I was desperate to get out of here. Already feeling like my skin was crawling.

“What were you talking about with Emma?” Noah asks the moment I sit down.

The disdain in his voice is very clear. No one needed to be told twice that the woman I had planned to spend the rest of my life with was his least favorite

person.

I This hate is another thing that made me put a pause on my relationship with Emma. How could I date her? How could I be with her when my son clearly hates her? How could I consider a relationship with her when she also doesn’t seem to like Noah?” Based on the things she said about him. It’s clear she resents him for either being Ava’s son or being the reason I had to marry Ava. Maybe it was both.

“Nothing important” I mumbled, feeling lost in thoughts.

We are quiet for a while until he opens his mouth again. The things he spews has be clenching my fists.

“I have a best friend now. Just like you and Uncle Gabe have Uncle Travis as your best friend” he begins.

“That’s good” I was in no mood to chat. My mood was soured. Noah didn’t seem to get the hint though. He kept talking.

“His name is Gunner and he is our new neighbor. They moved in about a week ago” I I just nod my head distractedly. It’s not that I wasn’t interested in what he was saying. I just had a lot on my F***ing mind. His mother being at the center of everything.

“You know” he pauses “He has a really good looking dad.” He finishes.

That piece of information immediately catches my attention. I turn to him and it’s then I notice his mischievous smile.

ve been to our house and when Gunner and I were playing mom and Mr Calvin were downstairs ong and eating cupcakes! He even promised to help mommy plant her vegetable garden the F! What the hell was he talking about and who the F was this Calvin guy? Why would Ave In her house knowing very well that the Reapera were still at large?

He continues. Smirking at me triumphantly as if he hadn’t just woken up a raging beast inside me.

“He made her laugh a lot. When Gunner and I came down for dinner, they were standing really close as he helped her set the table.” The more he talked, the more my fury rose. I clenched my teeth just to stop myself from lashing out at my own son. My F***ing heart was pounding and I couldn’t calm myself down as waves of anger washed over me.

7 was worried about what would happen to mom when you married Emma, but now with Calvin around you can do it. I still don’t like her, but you can marry her and mom can marry Calvin. He makes her laugh and Gunner will be my brother, so that’s a bonus.

I kid you not, Noah gives me an evil grin before delivering the final blow “Maybe Gunner and I can get more siblings, we’ll have to talk to them first but I’m sure they’ll agree” he finishes 1 I reach the end of my limit and blow up. My eyes narrowed into slits at the audacity my son had.

“Noah!” I shout, banging my hand on the F***ing picnic table.

Everyone turns to look at us. Confusion in their faces. They were all wondering what the hell was happening. This was the first time I’ve ever F***ing yelled at Noah “What?” he ask innocently as if he hadn’t just unleash a raging inferno inside me.

Instead of being afraid, he stands up, throws me a cat eating grin and then walks away. Heading towards my mother and Kate.

“What the hell was that about?” Gabe asks, sitting down next to me. A few seconds later, Travis joins us.

I was still fuming. Unable to control the rage that was inside me at knowing there was another man playing house with Ava and that Noah actually liked him.

No matter what I tried. I couldn’t get the Fing image of Ava laughing while setting at the table with another man. It brought havoc. Tearing at me in a way I didn’t Fing understand.

Ex-Husbands Regret Chapter 149-When I was around her, she rarely smiled. Let alone laugh. If she smiled, it was cold and detached. The fact that someone else was making her laugh was a F***ing hard pill to swallow.

“Yeah, what did Noah say to make you so mad?” Travis jumps in looking at me curiously.

“Nothing. Just some stuff about their new neighbor being cozy in Ava’s house and making her laugh” I ground out, fisting my hands.

Travis and Gabe look at each other before laughing. I didn’t care though, because my mind was in turmoil. a The need to punch something or someone was there and it was F***ing strong.

All I could see is red.

There was this primal part of me that wanted to scream that she was mine. That no other man should dare come close to her.

That part of me took me by surprise because I never considered her as mine.

She has always just been Ava. The woman w destroyed my F***ing life.

“It’s obvious he’s trying to make you jealous” Gabe states after their laughter dies down. “It’s not a secret that he wants you and Ava back together. He wanted to see your reaction and from how you’ve reacted it just proves to him that you care about Ava and that you care a lot” I glare at my brother. I want to deny what he just said, but I can’t. If I was being honest, then I would admit that I was feeling jealous. Pure, undiluted jealousy.

I want Ava to smile at me. To laugh a lot around me. I want to be the one in her house helping her set the damn table. Heck, I want to be the one to help her plant her vegetable garden.

The intense feeling brings my whole world to a stand still. I am Rowan Woods for F***s sake, yet I don’t mind getting down on my knees, with my hands in the dirt to help Ava plant her garden. As long as I was next to her, as long as I was the only man near her, then nothing else mattered.

I am shocked as those thoughts cross my mind. I never would have imagined wanting anything to do with Ava, but here I was, a completely changed man.

“Do you want Ava back?” Travis looks at me seriously.

His question take me aback, but I don’t have a F***ing answer. How do I tell him that I was confused as shit? How do I tell him that I can’t connect or comprehend all these feelings that were running amuck in my heart. That the intense feelings I have for Ava now, confused the living daylights out of me?

it just didn’t make any F***ing sense. Why now? Why not all those years back?

The endless questions were giving me a headache. Worst of all, I didn’t have a damn answer to any of them.

groan then stand up instead of answering. I ignore the questioning looks from my parents, the triumphant look from Noah and the confused look from Kate.

I needed space to breathe. Space to sort out my head and feelings. I thought I would get it inside the house away from everyone, but I was wrong.

Emma was sitting in the living room alone.

When she sees me, she jumps on her feet and approaches me.

“Please, Rowan, talk to me. Tell me how I can fix things” she pleads.

I don’t like hurting her, but that’s exactly what I will be doing if I continue giving her false hope. I don’t want to lead her on. Not when I knew deep down I didn’t feel the same way anymore.

Maybe she also didn’t feel the same. It’s been years. I bet her feelings have changed, but just like how I was before. She’s refusing to let go of the teenage, young love we had.

Running my hand through my hair, I answer. “You can’t fix anything, Emma. I don’t want to hurt you, but it’s time for us to accept that our love ran its course” “Are you telling me you don’t love me? That you love Ava instead?” She asks, shock and heart break. written all over her face.

Just like I did with Travis and Gabe, instead of answering I F***ing walk away.

As the day bleeds to night, I couldn’t help but ask myself the same thing.

If I wasn’t in love with Emma, does that mean I was in love with my ex–wife?

Ex-Husbands Regret Chapter 150-Ava.

The weekend was great. Nothing much happened, but I’d enjoyed spending time with mom and dad.

They were the kind of parents I’d hoped that mother and father would be.

Loving, caring and attentive. Instead they had been the complete opposite except when it came to Emma and Travis.

Hell, they even treated Rowan and Gabriel better than they ever treated me even though they claimed that I was their daughter.

The more time I spend with Nora and Theo, the more I grow to love them. The more I accept them as my parents. Being around them made me understand why Ethan adored them. Why he used to speak with so much love when it came to them. They were the best and no one had to be told twice about that. T “Where the hell is she?” Corrine asks in annoyance, breaking my thoughts.

We were at a cafe shop waiting for Letty, who like most of the times, is late. The woman is a secretary, but she has no sense of time. 1 “She’ll come. She’s probably just running late” I mumble around my blueberry muffin.

My pregnancy cravings have started to kick in and it’s driving me nuts. Right now all I want are muffins. and cupcakes. I take them for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Most of the food I try to eat end up tasting like sawdust.

“We agreed we should all be here by two” she grumbles, irritation distorting her beautiful face.

I chuckle at how pissed off she seems. “You’ll soon learn that Letty is rarely on time. The quicker you learn that, the better life will be for you” She’s silently fuming and I know why. Corrine isn’t someone that likes to be kept waiting. She’s the punctual type of person. The kind that would rather be an hour early than a second late.

As she stews I continue eating my muffin. I’m just so damn hungry all the freaking time.

With Noah I could barely keep anything down. No nausea medicine worked and it wasn’t until I was about six months into my pregnancy that things settled.

That’s why Rowan abandonment hurt me so much. There I was suffering. Barely surviving because I couldn’t keep food down and all he was doing the entire time was brooding and mooning over Emma. Not caring that I was losing weight and that my pregnancy was difficult.

had to be hospitalized a couple of times because my doctor was concerned about mine and Noah’s health.

I get he was heartbroken about losing Emma, but come one. Does that take precedence over the health and welfare of your unborn child?

Pushing those thoughts away, I focus on my friend. She was tapping her foot relentlessly.

“What’s wrong?” I finally ask when I can’t take it anymore.

“I had a business proposal for you and Letty, but since she’s not here yet, I’ll just have to tell you because it’s driving me insane” she speaks up after a moment.

1 “Okay..” “It’s going to sound absurd and it’s not really a business people of our social standing would consider” The moment she says that, my interest is piqued. That she would suggest that it’s not your normal traditional business has me curious on what idea she has come up with.

“Go on” “I wanted us to open up a S** toy company” she delivers the news with a straight face.

I choke on the sweetness I was eating, not sure I’d heard her correctly.

“Come again?” I stammer.

“A S** toy company” she repeats. “Think about it. Sex toys have become increasingly popular and I bet you seventy percent of women have it, whether one is single or not. Even men have began embracing it as a way to spice things up in the bedroom” I stare at her, my mouth hanging wide open.

“What’s got Ava shocked?” Letty asks, joining us.

I didn’t even hear her joining us. That’s how shocked I was.

She takes her seat and moves her gaze from me to Corrine. Trying to figure out what was going on.

“I just told Ava that the three of us should consider starting a S** toy company” Corrine answers.

expected Letty to be in the same boat as me. I expected her to be shocked by the idea. She isn’t.

‘s a good idea” she screams in excitement.

“Are both of you crazy?” I ask but they don’t seem to be paying me any mind.

It’s a great idea. I mean, which woman doesn’t have one of those pleasure bringers?” Corrine possesses the same question.

I don’t” They turn to look. With the way they look at me, you would think I’ve grown a second head or something.

“You don’t have one?” Letty seems surprised by this and I can’t for the life of me understand why.

“No and I’ve never had one” “Well you’re missing out on a lot” Corrine adds.

I mean I once considered them, but my S** life with Rowan wasn’t at a level where I could comfortably introduce them.

For Rowan it was about getting Sual relief and for me, it was about seeking a connection with him that was lacking in other parts of our lives “I think we should do this. Like Corrine said, it’s a profitable business. We just have to find away to stand out from all the other S toy producers” Letty happily says.

“It’s settled then, I’ll draw up the proposal and email them to both of you once I’ve covered everything” Corrine smiles, looking more relaxed