Ch. 166..170: The Luna and her Quadruplet Pups Chapter 166-170
The Luna And Her Quadruplet Pups Chapter 166
3rd Person
“Okay, so how’re we gonna do this?” Paisley asked, sitting around a large piece of construction paper with her siblings. Ryder -who had the best handwriting of all four – had written “Operation Santa” at the top of the page. Other than its title however, the page was entirely blank.
“Well, we know the North Pole’s at the top of the world, right?” Riley asked, waiting until the others nodded in agreement before continuing. “So if we just keep walking north then eventually we’ll have to get there!”
“Yeah but that could take ages!” Parker cautioned. “
The Dark Moon pack is north, but there’s at least two other packs between us and the pole.”
“Tha’s a good point.” Ryder agreed, “So maybe if we travel to one of the other packs and start there?”
“Yeah! But we can’t take too long, we have to make sure we can get there and back afore Christmas.” Paisley warned.
“Maybe we can get a ride back with Santa!” Riley suggested, her eyes sparkling with excitement.
“Wow, that would be amazing!” Ryder giggled.
“Okay so what do we need?” Paisley asked. “Really warm coats, snow boots, snacks..”
“Maybe some fish in case we need to d’stract any polar bears.” Parker mused aloud.
“Ooh, good idea.” Riley nodded, starting a list o their paper.
“We should also take hot cocoa, and marshmallows, to help stay warm.” Ryder added. “I wish we knew how to ski, that would make getting there a lot faster.”
“How about a sled” Ryder asked, “if we make friends with one of the polar bears, they might even pull us!”
“This is the best plan.” Paisley praised, grinning.
“We still have to figure out how to get north first.”
Riley reminded them, “it’s gonna be miles and miles before we get anywhere near the arctic.”
“Hmm, we’re too little to drive.” Parker remarked thoughtfully.
“We can’t drive a car,” Riley agreed, “but we could easily drive a sleigh. What if we ask Mommy to go back to the tree farm, just for the bonfire one night. She’d probbly agree, and then we could take one of the horsey sleighs from the stables.”
“That’s stealing.” Paisley protested, crinkling up her little nose in distaste.
“We’d only be borrowing it.” Ryder reasoned, “we’ll leave a note promising to bring it back.”
“Then we definitely need a compass.” Parker added,
“I don’t think horsies have GPS.”
“Good point.” Riley noted. “Do you think we should leave a note for Mommy too – so she knows we’re with Santa and she doesn’ need to worry?”
“I dunno – you know how Mommies can be, they worry ’bout everything.” Parker countered. “Member what Dr. Nora said? Mommy would do anything for us.
“Yeah, if we leave she might try to come after us anyway.” Ryder agreed. “She doesn’ know how well we’ve planned everything. She’ll think we’re in trouble.”
“i don’ wanna scare her. If we get a good enough head start then she won’t be able to catch up.” Paisley frowned.
“Okay, let’s do it!” Riley chirped. “Ryder, you write the , Parker you get the s’pplies. And Paisley and I will ask Mommy to take us for the bonfire. Deal?”
The others grinned, “Deal!”
That night Jane bundled up the pups and returned to the Christmas tree farm. She’d been hoping they would decorate the tree together that evening, but she was just glad the pups wanted to continue doing activities together. They’d been through such a difficult ordeal that she was willing to do just about anything to raise their spirits, besides, they were starting school in the new year, she wasn’t going to have as much time with them once they became kindergarteners.
When they arrived they headed straight for the bonfire, and Jane retrieved ingredients to make s’mores before cuddling up with the pups in front of the fire. The trees surrounding them on all sides had been strewn with lights, and it truly felt like a winter wonderland. She tried not to think about Ethan, about how wonderfully he would have kept her warm if he’d been there with them.
Instead she focused on her babies, praying they didn’t ask to go back and ask Santa to reunite their parents again.
“Have you thought any more about what you want for Christmas?” She asked, gently guiding Paisley’s hands to avoid sticking the marshmallow she had skewered on a stick directly into the flames of the fire.
The pups shrugged, not realizing she’d overheard their conversation with Santa. They knew exactly what they wanted, but they also realized she wasn’t going to get it for them.
“Hmm,” Jane hummed thoughtfully, “How about one of those big beautiful art sets they have in the craft store?” She asked Ryder, stroking his hair back from his eyes. “You love to paint.”
“Maybe.” He replied, his attention focused on his own marshmallow. The pups were determined to put their plan into motion, but they’d all agreed that there was always time for sweets.
“How about you, Parker? What would you think about a chemistry set – you could do all sorts of experiments?”
“Mommy you don’ have to get us fancy things.”
Paisley insisted, “Santa will take care of our presents.”
That’s what I’m afraid of. Jane thought bitterly. She hated knowing she couldn’t give the pups what they truly wanted, and it didn’t help that it was the only”updated by jobnib.com” thing she wanted too. She’d gone to her first therapy session the other day, and her doctor had advised her to acknowledge and address the fact that part of her fury with Ethan was because she still loved him so completely. She wanted him for Christmas too, and she knew they were all in for a disappointment.
“I know Santa is on the job.” She tried to smile, “but I want to get you something too. Riley, any thoughts? Riley peeked up at her with a sly smile. “How ’bout a pet bunny?”
“A pet bunny?” Jane exclaimed, internally thinking how adorable her mischievous daughter was. “I don’t know about that – you’d have to take care of it.” She had to admit that a bunny was less work than some other pets, but she was pregnant and any new pet with a new baby in the house was going to multiply the work. “Pets are lots of responsibility.”
The suggestion had gotten all of the children’s attention, and they were now clambering around her.”
Please Mommy! We promise we’ll take extra special care of it.” Paisley begged.
“We’ll be so ‘sponsible you’ll never have to lift a finger.” Ryder added.
“Hmm, are you sure you Wouldn’t rather have some new socks?” Jane teased. “So your feet will always be cozy?”
“Mommy no one wants smelly socks!” Parker exclaimed.
“What about a nice mop, so we can always keep the house clean?” Jane joked.
“Mommy that’s cwazy!” Ryder objected, “Mops aren’ fun.”
“Yeah, bunnies are fun.” Riley remarked pointedly.
“Alright, alright. I”‘ll think about it” Jane agreed with a grin, “Now pay attention to your marshmallows or they’ll burn.”
Jane felt a thousand times better now that she had an idea for making her children’s first Christmas together extra special. However she was having an increasingly hard time sitting still by the fire. The baby was pressing on her bladder, and she desperately needed the restroom. “How about a bathroom break, little ones?”
She suggested.
“But Mommy, the ‘smores are almost ready!” Parker objected.
“I know, but Mommy has to go.” Jane laughed, truly amused to have the tables turned on her this way.
“Can’t you hold it?” Riley asked.
“Not really.” Jane admitted.
“Then just go, we’ll stay right here.” Paisley promised. “We won’ move any muscles.”
“I don’t know.” Jane frowned, not liking the idea of taking her eyes off of her babies so soon after getting them back.
Fortunately, there was another mother with small pups next to them, and she offered Jane an understanding smile. “Don’t worry, I’ll keep an eye on them.”
“Okay munchkins, be good – I’ll be right back!” Jane vowed, evicting Ryder from her lap so she could go take care of business.
Little did she know that this had been precisely the opportunity the pups were waiting for. As soon as Jane walked away they hatched their plan, making a distraction for the other mother by knocking her toddler’s marshmallow into the fire. They felt badly, but they knew it was necessary. While she tended to her wailing child, they snuck off towards the stables.
When Jane came back from the restroom a few minutes later the other mother was looking around in shock and horror, realizing that her four charges were no longer sitting around the fire. Jane stopped dead in her tracks, feeling her heart stop beating completely. “What happened, where are they?” She hissed.
“I’m so sorry! I don’t know what happened, I turned my back for one moment and they were just gone!” She cried. “I’m so, so sorry.”
Just then the other woman’s child piped up from the fire, “Mommy, what’s this?”
The little boy was holding a small folded piece of paper, and Jane gently took it from the child. When she unfolded it she immediately recognized Ryder’s neat handwriting.
Mommy,
We went to the North Pole. Don’t worry. We’ll be safe with Santa and we’ll get a ride home from the rain deer.
See you soon – love,
Parker, Paisley, Riley and Ryder.
The Luna And Her Quadruplet Pups Chapter 167
Jane
I can’t believe this! I can’t believe this is happening!
I take off into the snow, following my pups’ scent and leaving my negligent babysitter behind. What was I thinking? I knew better than to take my eyes off of them, to trust anyone else with their precious lives! Did I not learn my lesson in the Southern Isles! What is wrong with me!
Their scent is leading me towards the horse stables, and suddenly I realize what they must be planning, they must be thinking they can drive one of the sleighs all the way to Santa Claus. I don’t have the faintest idea why they’ve chosen to go to the North Pole when there’s a Santa Claus here in the grotto – unless of course they figured this one isn’t the real Santa Claus. As soon as I think it, I know this must be the case. Oh Goddess, why is this happening?
I’m cursing Ethan as I run. This is his fault. They want him, that’s why they’re so determined to get to Santa. I have half a mind to go back to the NightFang territory and give him a good strong kick in the p*nts. If anything happens to the pups I’ll never forgive him – or myself. As I near the stables I see the barn doors open, and a sleigh hooked up to two huge Clydesdales emerges. The horses set off into the snow, but so far they’re still walking.
“Stop!” I cry, causing the four tiny beings in the driver’s seat to turn around in surprise. They try to lash the reins so that the horses will take off, but they don’t seem to be strong enough. The horses are still moving faster than I am, but I’m still on two legs. I begin r!pping at my scarf and coat, my inner wolf already at the surface amidst the threat to my pups. I chuck my outer layer into the snow, then let my wolf out, shifting mid-run.
On all fours I dart after the sleigh, listening to the anxious cries of my pups as they urge the horses to speed up. “Yah, yah!” Riley cries, while Paisley bounces in the seat next to her. “Come on horsies! Come on horsies!”
I’m growling with anger now, no longer afraid for their lives, but furious with the little angels for running from me like this. The horses hear my growls and realize a predator is behind them, but it’s too late. I speed up, leaping into the back of the sleigh before it can get away.
Shifter back, I climb over the back seat and yank the reins from Riley’s hands, pulling the vehicle to an abrupt stop.
I clamp my eyes shut, gasping in deep breaths of air.
It’s over. I think frantically. It’s over, they’re safe. Well, for now out least. I’m not sure if I’ve ever been angrier with my pups, and this is certainly the first time l’ve ever been cross with Paisley.
“Uh-oh.” Paisley murmurs, looking up at me with wide eyes.
“Uh-oh, is right.” I hiss, trying to stay calm while we’re still in public. I turn the sleigh around, guiding it back to the stables as naked as the day I was born. I pull it to a stop by my abandoned coat and scarf, wrapping them around myself and turning back to the pups.
“Out of the sleigh, right now.”l command.
“Mommy, you don’ understand!” Riley protests, her lower l!p quivering.
“I understand perfectly.” I growl. “Now get out of this sleigh.”
One by one the pups clamber down, and by now a few stable boys have emerged from the barn, confusion clear on their faces, l apologize profusely and wait for them to lead the horses away before turning on my pups.
“We’re leaving right now, and if you know what’s good for you, you’ll come away without complaint.”
Thankfully they do as they’re told, and l’m able to keep a tight lid on my fury. The car ride home is silent.
The pups are sulking, and I’m taking the opportunity to get my temper under control. I don’t want to be so angry with them, I know that they were just trying to go see Santa, that don’t understand the danger they were in, but my maternal instincts are only too aware of what might have happened, and it’s getting harder and harder to push down my feelings.
When we’re finally back home I line them up on the couch, not bothering to change clothes. I stand in front of them with my arms crossed over my ch3st, “Well, what do you have to say for yourselves?”
“We just wanted to see Santa.” Riley tells me sullenly. “And you ruined it!”
“You better believe I did!” I bite back. “Do you have any idea what might have happened to you? Do you have any idea how far away the North Pole is? It would have taken you months to get anywhere close and that’s assuming you had the food and supplies to survive.
What actually would have happened is that you would have gotten lost in the mountains with nothing to protect you or keep you warm. You’re lucky I stopped you when I did! You would have frozen to death by morning!”
I wouldn’t normally be so blunt with them, but they have to understand how dangerous their actions were.Looking at their surprised faces, I’m pleased to see the information sinking in. They exchange awed looks,”
Really?”
“Really.” Il confirm fiercely. “l can’t believe you would try something like that, after everything you just went through! What’s more, I can’t believe you were so deceitful. You clearly were planning this from the moment you asked me to go to the farm! You planned on sneaking away from me, on stealing that sleigh, I’m completely ashamed of you. I did not raise you to be thieves!”
“We were gonna give it back.” Ryder whispers, squirming nervously.
“You still lied to me, you tricked me and ran away from me when I explicitly told you to stop! I know you wanted to see Santa and I understand why.”
“No you don’t!” Parker interrupts, glaring at me, “You don’ know anything!”
“You wanted Santa to bring Daddy to you for Christmas, to get us back together.” I answer firmly. “And I know you miss him but there isn’t a magical solution to this. These grown up issues are serious, and I know you’re unhappy, I know you miss him, but there isn’t any way to just snap your fingers and fix this. Not even Santa has that power.”
“We were trying to help you too! We know you miss Daddy!” Paisley interjects.
“Why can’t you just tell him you made a m’stake?”
Riley adds, her little cheeks bright red. “You tell us not to be stubborn, but you’re just as stubborn as we are.”
“Because l didn’t make a mistake.” I grit out. “When you grow up you’ll see that just because something feels bad, it doesn’t mean it’s the wrong thing to do. In fact sometimes doing the right thing can be the most painful.
I don’t expect you to understand that right now and you know what, I don’t expect you to like me or the decisions I’m making for this family. I do expect you to respect me.
“I lecture, hating how stern I sound. “I’m your mother, I make the rules, and you will follow them or you will all end up grounded until the new year.”
“Grounded?” They repeat aghast.
“That’s right.” I confirm. I’ve never gone as far as grounding my pups, mostly because they’ve been too young previously. Not to mention that their mischief hasn’t ever escalated to this level. They’re no stranger to time outs and having toys taken away, but long term punishment is a new concept.
“But it’s Christmas!” They object.
“Which is all the more reason for you to behave.” I growl. “Santa is watching after all, and he doesn’t reward pups that disobey their Mommies. You don’t want coal in your stockings, do you?”
The pups looked back and forth between each other, wearing identical sullen pouts. “That isn’ fair.” Riley insisted.
“It’s perfectly fair, and it’s what’s going to happen if you don’t shape up.” l announce. “Now go get ready for bed.”
“But it’s still early!” Parker gaped.
“Yes, and you’re going to go to bed early tonight – you’ve had more than enough excitement to warrant it!”
The pups slink away with their tails between their legs, and l sink down onto the edge of the coffee table, fighting back tears. All the progress I thought we’d made together just went out the window. I’m back to being the villain, and they’re back to hating me. I don’t regret punishing them – they scared the life out of me tonight, and this is part of the job. I just wish we could find a way out of this misery. I just want my family to be happy again – the question is whether we can ever be truly happy without Ethan.
The Luna And Her Quadruplet Pups Chapter 168
Jane
“Daddy!” The sound of my pups’ frightened voices send me jerking upright in bed, suddenly and completely awake. I rush to their bedroom, flipping on the light and finding all four children piled on one bed, tears running down their cheeks.
“Oh my loves, did you have nightmares?” I croon, immediately moving forward to comfort them.
They nod, but instead of running into my arms, they tighten their ranks. “Yes, but we don’t want you, we want Daddy!” Paisley cries.
Pain slices through me, so powerfully it steals the breath from my lungs. I feel as though I’ve been punched in the stomach. No matter how bad things are between us, I’ve always been the one my pups turn to when they’re frightened or upset. “Well Daddy isn’t here.” I say shakily.”‘So you can have me, or nothing.”
“T-then we ch-choose nothing.” Riley informs me through her sobs.
I close my eyes so they can’t see me cry, nodding as my insides harden to stone. “Please don’t be that way.
You know l love you, I don’t want you to be sad or scared, won’t you let me help?”
They stubbornly shake their heads, cuddling closer to one another. “Fine.”I sniff turning for the door. “Do you want me to leave the light on?”
They exchange glances. “Do we have to go back to sleep?”
I glance at the clock, it’s after three AM, late enough that they could probably stay up and make up for lost sleep with an extra long nap. “No, I suppose not.”
I can’t stand this. Normally I would cuddle them back to sleep and sing them lullabies, the fact that they won’t let me comfort them feels like the worst rejection, and I’m trying very hard not to fall to pieces in front of them. We head into the kitchen and I make them some warm milk, hoping they’ll get drowsy and go back to sleep, but prepared to stay up with them if they don’t. I’m exhausted myself – between the eventful evening and the baby quickly growing in my belly. It’s getting harder to keep up with my pups every day.
They sit at the table in utter silence, and I emit a belabored sigh. “Do you want to tell me what you dreamed about?”
I don’t expect them to actually share their dream with me, but after a few extended moments of silence Parker speaks up. “We were back at Daddy’s ‘partment, playing in the Iiving room. Then Eve and ‘Nita and the King came in and kidnapped us. We were locked in a cold dark room, listening to them talk about what to do with us. Eve just wanted to hurt us, but ‘Nita and the King wanted to use us to get to you and Daddy.”
“And you all dreamed the same thing?” I ask.
They nod, confirming my suspicion. This doesn’t surprise me. The pups have always shared dreams for as long as I can remember. “Well the good news is that it wasn’t real.” I tell them gently. “You know none of those people can ever hurt you or Daddy and I again. Eve is in prison, and Anita and the King are dead.”
The pups nod, leaning against one another for comfort, but they don’t say anymore. “You know when you were missing I used to have dreams about you. At the time I thought it was just my imagination in overdrive, but now I think it might have been the Goddess trying to lead me to you. I had one dream about you racing down a river, and fighting a huge snake. I had another where you were trapped underground, trying to get out. I always used to wake up screaming and crying, just like you did.” I share.
“Did Daddy have dreams ’bout us too?” Paisley asks.
“I’m sure he did.” I say honestly. “But he never told me about them. I think he was worried it would make me more afraid, but sometimes it’s nice to know that other people are feeling the same way you are.”
“Daddy used to let me stay up and tell me stories when I had bad dreams.” Paisley tells us, staring solemnly at her la*p.
“Oh, what kinds of stories?” I press.
“Stories’bout you.” She whispers, peeking up at me.
I can see how terribly conflicted she is. 0f all the pups, she’s the one who’s stuck hardest in the middle. She had four years with Ethan, he was her entire world before I came along, and I was just a fantasy. I’m sure I’m not even coming close to living up to her fantasy, but…
“Will you tell us a story ’bout Daddy?” Ryder asks, looking as though he’s not sure whether this will make me angry or not.
“Okay.” l agree, hating to think my babies might be afraid of my temper. “What kind of story?”
“How ’bout the first Christmas you spent t’gether?”
Paisley requests.
“Okay.” I concede, delving back into my memories. “
Well, the first year we were married wasn’t very exciting.”
Not to mention it’s not even the least bit appropriate to share with my children. We spent the entire holiday in bed together, making love in every possible way and position Ethan could think of. “But the first Christmas we spent as a couple was actually a lot of fun. His parents didn’t know we were dating-“
“Why not?” Riley asks.
“Well, we were sixteen, and Ethan’s Mommy and Daddy didn’t think I was good enough for him. We came from different worlds in a lot of ways, and we knew they’d try to make us break up if they found out.” I explain, trying not to condemn Ethan’s mother too strongly, knowing Paisley loved her.
“That’s ‘spicable.” Parker grimaced.
“Despicable,” I correct gently. “And Ethan and I never let it stop us. He was determined for us to be together no matter what they thought. You know we actually had to get married in secret?”
“You did?” Riley exclaims in awe.
“We did.” I smile. “But that first Christmas, we were just kids, and I grew up without a lot of things. My mom worked really really hard, but we were poor so I never had any presents… a lot of times we didn’t even have food to eat.” Riley, Ryder and Parker have heard this before, but Paisley hasn’t ever heard me speak about my childhood before now.
“Why not?!” She asks, her eyes wide with disbelief.
“Because not everyone in the pack is as lucky as we are now. Some people really struggle, and it can be impossible to change things when you don’t have any money or any way to make more.” l answer softly, wanting to make sure she understands that the privileges she’s grown up with aren’t universal. “Your Daddy knew this, so he always brought me extra food and looked out for me. And that Christmas he gave me my first ever Christmas present.”
“You mean you’d never had presents ‘afore?” Paisley inquires, absolutely shocked.
“l used to get little things in my stocking from Santa,
“I reply, “but I never had any big presents. I wasn’t expecting to get any that year either. I figured Ethan would bring Mom and I some of his family’s Christmas feast, but when he turned up at my door, he was carrying an armful of gifts. He even had something for my mother.”
“What did he get you?” Riley asks eagerly.
“Well, there was a beautiful necklace far nicer than anything else I owned. There were expensive chocolates and a pretty red dress. And you know that plush wolf that sits on my dresser?” I prompt, waiting for them to nod before continuing. “He gave me that too. It looks like his wolf and he used to joke that it would protect me when he wasn’t around.”
The more I think about these memories, the harder it is to keep my emotions in check. I can feel the pups watching me like little hawks, and I try not to let on how nostalgic I’m feeling.
“What did you get him?” Parker questions curiously.
“l painted him a picture.” I shrug. “As I said, I didn’t have money, so all the gifts I gave were things Li made.”
“I know that painting.” Paisley chirps. “Daddy used to keep it in his office, but he always used to catch me sneaking in to stare at it, so he moved it to my room. Is really pretty” she tells the others. “Of a wolf playing in the snow.”
I actually knew this, l’d seen the painting in Paisley’s room at the penthouse, but I didn’t realize how it had gotten there. “Well, there you go.” I conclude weakly.
That was our first Christmas.”
The pups are watching each other again, speaking their secret quadruplet language I can never understand.
“Won’t you miss him this year?” Paisley asks after a moment.
“Yes.” I answer honestly, sick of lying and knowing they won’t believe it anyway.
“Then why can’t we be together?” Ryder demands.
“Because it’s simply not possible.” I reply, gentle but firm. “I wish it was, but there are some things we can’t change, and this is one of them.”
“I don’ understand.” Parker frowns.
“I know you don’t, sweetheart.” As I look around at my young children, I decide that I might not be able to fix everything in their lives, but I can at least try to call Ethan. I haven’t let myself consider this possibility before -knowing I won’t succeed and not sure my pride can take another defeat. But looking at them now, I realize I have to try. I know I’ll probably come to regret it, but l’d regret it more if I didn’t try every last recourse for my pups. So this afternoon when they do down for their naps, I’m going to svck it up and call their father for the first time since he rejected me.
The Luna And Her Quadruplet Pups Chapter 169
Jane
“Okay, you can do this. You can do this. You can do this.”I repeat to myself, staring at the phone in my hands with utter trepidation.
The pups are sleeping soundly in their bedroom, and I’m getting ready to sacrifice my dignity in their honor.
I’m not sure how Ethan will respond to my phone call, if he’ll even answer when he sees my number on the screen. I’m half tempted to go find a pay phone and calI from a number he won’t recognize, but I decide to try this first. Taking one last deep breath, I dial and hit the send button, raising the device to my ear.
It seems to ring for an utter eternity, but eventually the line clicks, and Ethan’s deep voice sounds in my ear.
“Jane?”
The familiar sound sends a shiver down my spine. “
Hello Ethan.”
“I thought I told you not to contact me.” Ouch, I know l expected failure, but that seems harsh, even for Ethan.
“Actually you just told me to leave, you didn’t say I couldn’t ever reach out.”I correct him hoarsely. It’s only been four weeks, but it feels like an eternity since we last spoke. Those early days after l left with the pups had passed in a haze that still haunted me, and it feels so surreal just to hear his familiar voice.
“Well I should have.” He growls. “I didn’t realize I had to spell everything out letter by letter. I thought you were smarter than that.”
“Wil you just listen for a moment.” I beg, hating how cruel he’s being.
He pauses for a moment. “Is something wrong?
“Well that depends on how you define wrong.” I snap. “Your pups are absolutely heartbroken without you. They don’t understand why they can’t see you, they’re completely traumatized from the Southern lsles – every other night they’re having nightmares and begging for you instead of me, and yesterday they attempted to run away to the North Pole so they could ask Santa to bring you back to them for Christmas.”
Silence meets me on the other end of the line. I wait impatiently for a response, wondering if he’s even still there. “Ethan?” I prompt after a moment.
“Is that all? He questions coldly.
“Is that all?” I repeat, not believing my ears. “Is that all?! Ethan they could have been killed, they stole a horse-drawn sleigh and were taking off into the mountains. They’re desperate to be with you and they don’t understand why you’re suddenly not in their life anymore! And now they hate me, so you’re the only one they want!”
“Why should they hate you?” He snaps, sounding even harsher than he had a moment ago.
“You don’t think I told them that you’d abandoned them, do you?” I hiss. “I took the blame for you so they wouldn’t develop a complex, and now they think that it’s my fault they can’t see you.”
“Well they’re not wrong.” Ethan rumbles. “It is your fault. If you’d done what you were supposed to in the Southern lsles, we wouldn’t be in this situation.”
My mouth falls open as his words steal my breath right out of my lungs. I can’t believe him. I can’t believe how badly it hurts to hear him speak to me this way. He wasn’t even this cruel when Eve staged her attack all those years ago. I can’t believe how badly I misjudged him, and I’m furiouş with myself for falling for his act.
Still, l have to stand up for my children. “So you don’t even care that you’re punishing the pups for my wrongs?
“I demand fiercely. “You don’t care that they’ re completely innocent and they worship the ground you walk on – especially Paisley!”
I’ don’t understand why you’re complaining?” Ethan counters. “Isn’t this exactly what you wanted? You were planning to take her from me and cut off contact from the very beginning.”
“That was before!” I burst out, loosing hold of my temper.
“Before what?” He remarks boredly.
“Before you made me love you again!” I exclaim. “
Why did you do that? If you cared this little about the children, why did you fight for me the way you did, why did you make me love you if you didn’t actually want us to be a family.”
“We’ve been over this.” He rumbles. “You owed me for faking your death and hiding the other pups from me.
You deserved to pay.”
“You’re nothing but a sociopath.” I accuse, feeling maternal rage bubble up inside of me. “It’s one thing to punish me, to break my heart, but it’s another to punish innocent pups. They didn’t do anything wrong – they don’t deserve this, Ethan.” I protest, tears burning in my eyes.
“Then maybe you’ll think twice before you decide to play with their fates again.”Ethan snarls. “All I did was give you what you wanted Jane. And yeah, maybe I snuck a lesson in there for you along the way, but this was your dream ending. You made your bed, now go sleep in it- and never contact me again.”
He hangs up before I can say another word, and before I can stop myself I hurl my phone against the wall, flinching when it strikes and bounces off again, clattering to the ground. I follow suit, sinking onto the floor and wrapping my arms around my knees, finally letting my tears fall freely. How could I ever have been fooled by that man, not once, but twice?
Suddenly I’m remembering the teenage alpha who turned up at my door on my sixteenth Christmas, bearing food and gifts for me and mom. I know how I fell in love with him, he’d been sweet, protective and affecti0nate nothing like the monster he was now. Where did that Ethan go? What happened to that loving, generous boy?
“Ethan, I can’t accept this!” I’d exclaimed, staring at the emerald necklace he’d bought to match my eyes. It was the first gift l’d opened, and already it was more valuable than anything l’d ever owned before.
“Sure you can.” He grinned. “l picked it out just for you.”
“But it’s too much!” I insisted. “Girls like me aren’t meant for jewels and finery, and I’ll never be able to get you anything near as nice.”
“You are meant for every bit of decadence and luxury there is, little wolf.” Ethan corrected sternly, “just because you haven’t had it yet doesn’t mean you don’t deserve it. This is just a small token, and you have already given me so much more in return. You give me more every day.”
I open my mouth to object again, but he places his finger over my l!ps. “Besides, if you refuse it “‘ll be offended.” He teases. “Now open your other gifts.”
I tried to argue with every subsequent present, but Ethan always silenced my every protest, eventually ceasing verbal arguments and just k!ssing me senseless every time I tried to open my mouth. By the time I was ready to give him my own gift in return, I was half delirious with his affection. My skin was flushed and my eyes probably had stars in them, but I gradually found the courage to hand over the framed painting. “It’s not much, and it’s nothing compared to everything you’ve given me, but -“
Ethan claimed my lips again, “hush.”
I watched nervously as he unwrapped the golden paper, then watched his handsome face transform as he took in the painting. He blinked in amazement a couple of times, before looking up at me, “You painted this?
“Yes, but if you don’t like it -” Again I found my words stolen by Ethan’s lips, only this time he didn’t stop at my mouth, he took my face between his hands and k!ssed every inch of my skin. “It’s incredible, and I love it.
” He praised when he finally pulled back. “You’re incredible.”
“You really like it?” I squeaked.
“It’s the best gift I’ve ever gotten, because you made it, and your heart is in every brushstroke.” He proclaimed, “now I feel like I didn’t get you enough, I just spent money, I didn’t do anything like this.”
“Ethan if you try to give me anything else I will throw an actual tantrum.” I warned him, only half joking.
Ethan chuckled. “You see the problem with you is that I like everything you do – I’d probably even like your tantrums.”
“Trust me, you wouldn’t.” I laughed.
I suppose only time will tell.” Ethan joked.
As I come out of the memory, I find myself crying harder than ever. Only this time I’m not weeping for my own broken heart, or even for my pups. I’m weeping for that poor naive girl l once was, the one who blindly walked into the arms of a predator and let him destroy her. Suddenly I’m mourning for the life I might have had if I hadn’t fallen for Ethan’s tricks. Don’t mistake me, I wouldn’t trade my pups for anything in the world, and I would gladly suffer Ethan’s abuse to have them again, but my soul is just so worn down and tired from the pain Ethan inflicted, and I hate what he did to that bright-eyed young woman. It’s clear to me now that I did the right thing shielding my pups from the truth. I don’t want Ethan to do to them, what he did to me.
I decide then and there that I’m doing crying over Ethan. This will be the last time – and then l’m never looking back.
The Luna And Her Quadruplet Pups Chapter 170
If I thought I was angry before, it’s nothing compared to what I feel now.
I’ve known maternal rage plenty of times since bringing the pups into the world, not the least of which was when Anita stole them from us and Aimon threatened their lives. Still, this mistreatment feels worse – because it’s not coming from some dark foe, but from the person who is supposed to love and protect them most – second only to me.
The more I think about it, the more I believe that the betrayal of a parent is the worst transgression a pup can suffer, and I hate Ethan for abandoning our children. I want to storm back to the NightFang territory and beat him bloody – and the idea is so tempting I have to remind myself I have responsibilities here.
I’m trying to get back into the swing of things at work, and I’m terribly behind on my La Louve duties. Not to mention that I’m devoting the weekends to trying to win over my heartbroken pups. They’ve barely spoken to me since I stopped them from going to the North Pole, and I’m continuously amazed at how determined their young minds can be. A trip to the Nightfang territory might make them come around, my wolf suggests.
But what if Ethan rejects me the same way he rejected me? I think anxiously, I won’t let him hurt them.
He won’t. My stubborn wolf insists. He loves them too much.
I thought he loved me too once, remember? I respond bitterly. And he didn’t seem to love them so much when he abandoned us. He certainly didn’t seem loving on the phone. He didn’t even care that they were in pain, that they were taking risks to reunite with him.
That’s different. He’s angry with you, not them.
They’re his pups, the boys are his heirs. My wolf begs.
Then why is he doing this? He can forsake me, I don’t care how cruel he is to me – but not the pups.
Not my babies. I crying still, despite my promise to myself. It can’t be helped, my hormones roiling on top of this fresh pain.
Then take them back. She insists. You’ll suffer, but this can’t continue. The pups need him. Besides, if you keep this up then eventually they’ll figure out they’ve been abandoned, if you can make him take them back then at least you can save them from ever finding out. You can convince him to let them stay, even if you have to go back to being his pet. Their happiness is worth any price. My wolf continues, and part of me wonders if she’s just angling to be near him again. She’s always been much weaker willed than I am when it comes to staying away from our chosen mate. Of course, she knows my thoughts perfectly, and adds, They’re miserable without Ethan. This isn’t about you.
All at once, I realize my wolf is right. This isn’t about me – not my pride or my hurt feelings. It’s not even about my broken heart. It’s about my pups.
They need their father – now that they’ve met him, I’m simply not enough for them anymore. It was fine when Daddy was just some abstract idea, but now that they know what it’s like to have two loving parents, one won’t do. Besides, I’m carrying another child now, and I don’t want to repeat history. I don’t want to let this child grow up without a father too.
When I lost Ethan the first time, I didn’t have the ability to fight for us – Petra and Eve stole that from me, but I can fight this time. Not for myself of course, it’s clear that there’s nothing left to salvage in our relation ship. But I can fight for my children I will always fight for my children. I would be letting them down if I didn’t at least try to make Ethan uphold his commitment to the kids.
We have to go back.
The next morning I wake the pups first thing, wondering if I’ve lost my mind. Is it going to confuse them too much to be going back and forth this way?
Am I making a mistake with this gamble? If I could go face Ethan on my own first and shield them from his fury, I would. However I have a strong suspicion that their presence is the only thing that will convince him to rethink his decision. Besides, I was already afraid to take my eyes off the pups after the Southern Isles, and now that they’ve attempted a trek to the North Pole, there’s no way I’m going to risk leaving them behind.
Mommy why are we up so earlies? Riley complains, giving me a sullen pout. The sun isn’t even awakes yet.”
I know baby, but I thought you’ d want to know what I’ve decided.” I answer, trying to smile.
All four eye me suspiciously, no doubt thinking that my last decision was a terrible one and feeling skeptical of my reasoning skills. What ‘cision?”
Parker inquires. I don’t like your ‘cisions.”
Do I know my pups? I think, resisting the urge to shake my head.
You’ll like this one.” I promise, deciding to spit out the words before I can change my mind. I’m taking you to see Daddy.”
It speaks volumes that they don’t immediately jump up with glee. Instead they continue watching me with those same uncertain expressions, as if they aren’t sure they can trust me. That breaks my heart just a little more. My babies have always trusted me with everything – my word, my advice, my safety.
“But you said we couldn’ see him – you said we couldn’ talk to him.” Paisley objects.
I sigh, absolutely hating this. Not only do they not trust me, but I’m giving them nothing but instability at the time they need stability most. They haven’t yet recovered from their ordeal, and if it wasn’t for their unhappiness, I would never waffle this way.
I’m sure that fact is only making it harder to believe and confide in me. “I know.” I confirm, “But I was wrong. I want you all to be happy, and you clearly aren’t. I’m sorry about all of this – truly. I feel terrible.
My only relief is that the pups look somewhat chagrined to hear I feel badly. Their little faces fall slightly and they exchange guilty glances – they might be angry with me, but there must still be some hope. I’m still their mother, and no child likes seeing their mother sad or hurt. “We’re really gonna see Daddy?” Ryder asks, as if he can’t believe his ears.
“Yes angel, as soon as you all are ready to go, we ‘ll get in the car and go back to the NightFang territory.” I share.
Still they don’t move. “Are we gonna stay? Paisley murmurs, looking up at me hopefully.
Yeah, is it just a visit, or forevers?” Riley asks, wrapping one plump arm around her sister’s shoulders.
Oh Goddess, I don’t know how to answer that. I’d like to think Ethan and I can find a way to reach some sort of peace agreement and share the pups, but I don’t know if this is actually p0ssible. There’s a very real chance he’ll kick us to the curb at first sight, or throw me out and keep the pups for himself. I know it’s not going to be easy, and I’m counting on his love for our children to save our future.
I honestly don’t know.” I answer gravely, deciding that the truth is better than more lies or misleading information.
Why not?” Parker demands, looking flabbergasted that I don’t have such an important answer.
Because Daddy and I need to talk things over. We have to come to an agreement.” I explain.
You didn’t need an ‘greement when you stoled us.” Riley counters bitterly.
I didn’t steal you. I’m your Mommy, you belong with me.” I state simply, praying for patience. “And
I am sorry for bringing you here instead of letting you go home with Daddy, but sometimes even the best laid plans can go awry. Do you know what that means?”
No.” Ryder admits, frowning.
“It means that often we try to do the right thing, which is good and important,” I qualify, telling myself that this is as good a time as any to sneak in a lesson for my clever munchkins. but no matter how hard we try or how pure our heart is, things we didn’t plan, and never expected end up happening instead. And sometimes you can be trying to do the right thing, and accidentally hurt someone along the way.”
The pups are still looking confused, but they slowly nod. “Okay, Mommy. We believes you.”
Thank you.” I breathe honestly. ‘Now let’s go, we need to get on the road.”
The drive to the Nightfang territory takes all day and all night, but we don’t stop except for food and bathroom breaks. By midmorning the following day we’re outside of the Penthouse. I’m practically hyperventilating on the elevator ride up to the top floor, but the pups are practically climbing the walls they’re so eager to see their father.
We knock on the door, and soon I hear measured footsteps approaching. It doesn’t sound like Ethan’s usual walking gate, and at first I think someone else must be coming to answer our knock. Of course a moment later the door swings open, and I realize my guess is incorrect.
Ethan.