Ch. 126..130: I Will Never Be Yours Chapter 126-130
Chapter 126
Selena POV:
Walking out of the portal while I pull Jessie with me we come right in front of the barrier where I know Zoey is, closing the portal after us I drop my hold on Jessie’s arm and walk closer to where Zoey stands.
“Where did they leave and how long ago?” I boom out, too angry to be able and contain my anger completely. Trying to take deep breaths and keep my gift at bay I feel it sizzling and stirring under my skin, ready to come out.
Zoey turns and looks at me
“It can’t be longer than twenty minutes ago! I only had to go inside the pack house for a short moment and once I came out they were gone! I don’t know where they went!” she says and turn to look at Jessie. Turning around to look at her she keeps her eyes on the ground.
“Jessie!” I bark at her and she is quick to raise her head and look at me, guess she feels the anger radiates out of me because she takes a step back and looks between us both.
“I can’t help you with it because I don’t know and he has cut me off so I can’t mind link him!” she says and throws her hands up in the air.
“Where are the others?” I ask Zoey, no one of Kian’s men is here by the borders and I wonder if Jacob ordered for the men to follow him outside the borders or if they wanted to go with him.
“Kian’s men were on the other side the last I saw them and they could be inside. and eating by now. I don’t know! My focus has been trying to find them!” she says and I feel how worried she is. Trying to mind link Jacob but I’m cut off from him, I know he wants it that way!
I can’t shift to my wolf now when I’m pregnant or I would have done it and tried to search for them and in what direction they went! Hearing some running from behind I turn around only to find Declan and Cannon comes running over to where we are standing, they stop right in front of us and I see Declan trying to reach for Jessie but she takes a step to the side and pushes his hands away.
“What happening?” he says to Jessie but she only keeps her lips in a tight line.
“Has something happened when you were away?” he asks and turns to look at me. I’m waiting a moment to see if Jessie wants to tell him herself but she keeps quiet.
“Jessie here and Jacob has decided to go against my orders and Jacob is now outside the barrier with some other men to look after the rogues!” I say when Declan snaps his head to look at Jessie.
“Is this true Jessie?” I hear Declan say in an angry voice when I turn to Cannon, I know if there is anyone who can pick up any trace it’s him.
“Can you find out where they went?” I ask him when he gives me a nod and takes. off his clothes and shifts to his wolf. He starts to sniff on the ground and it doesn’t take long until he has found a trace he starts to follow. Hearing Declan starts to argue with Jessie I don’t stay and listen to what’s happening and start to follow after Cannon, Zoey walks bedside me when he sniffs on the ground.
“Did the others follow him because they wanted or did he order them?” I ask Zoey while we follow a few steps behind Cannon.
“I don’t know Selena! I didn’t hear them talk or what was said, when I came out again they were all gone. I instantly knew they had left on purpose when I tried to mind link them all!” she says and it does nothing to help my worry. As of now my Gamma has gone against my orders and my Beta is just as involved in this as him, my closest men disobeyed my orders to go after a whole army of rogues and vampires.
Seeing Cannon stop right inside the borders, he sniffs closer before he mind links me and I pick it up.
“They went through here but it has been a little while since they left!” he says and I look outside the barrier if I can get any sight of them when I hear several footsteps. behind me and a heated argument, I already know is Jessie and Declan before they reach over to where we stand.
I have a hard time containing my anger over this situation and how stupid they have been to try and go after them. Trying to mind link Jacob again but I’m cut off when Cannon shift back and Declan hand him his clothes, he put them on when Jessie walks closer to where I am.
“We have to go after them!” she says and my anger flares to life at her words, swirling around I catch her eyes with mine and take a step closer to her. She has gone way too far this time and there is nothing she can say that can have me to calm down.
“You don’t think you have done enough? You are supposed to be my closest men and follow my orders not go against them to do whatever fits you! Don’t you think I want to go after the rogues and have an end to all this? I’m not ready to risk everyone’s lives against an army we know nothing about and we aren’t prepaid for! Why do you think Kian went to the vampire council in the first place!” I bark at her, feeling my gift almost boiling under my skin from the anger.
I see she is about to say something but closes her mouth again and takes a step back when my anger starts to slip out of my body.
“If my closest men doesn’t follow my orders what message does it send to everyone else? And if they get killed who is going to have it on their conscious you think?” I continue to bark at her when I feel a mind link trying to reach for me.
Even before I pick it up I know it is one of my men who went outside with Jacob and I know the man is hurt.
He doesn’t talk when I pick up the link but I can feel where he is and I have to get there right now, he is hurt and now there is no stop in my anger! What I feared has happened.
Opening a portal beside me I turn to look at them all when I see Emma comes rushing from a far distance.
“None of you are allowed to follow after me or walk outside the barrier!” I say and let my Alpha command slip out and wash over them all, with my anger boiling inside my body it hits them hard and they show me their necks in submission. Even Declan and Cannon does it and I realize it’s because we have mated and me being their Queen puts me over them.
Taking one last look at them I know they can’t go against my orders, turning to look at Emma where she is running this way there is nothing she can say to get me to change my mind. Taking a step inside my portal I close it after me so she can’t follow after me!
Chapter 127
Kian POV:
I’ve got some strange feelings through the bond and something is going on with Selena today.
After I have talked with her through the mind link it only confirms my suspicions and I have to end my meeting here and get back to her, I won’t call her to portal me back I will just show up and find out what it is for myself!
Walking out of my room I head over to find Oscar, this early in the morning I often find him in the library reading a book. Heading down the hall to the library I push the doors open and walk inside, just like I thought he is sitting in his chair with a book in front of him.
He is one of the highest council members and the one I prefer to have a conversation with.
“I have to end my visit here and get back!” I say to him when I walk inside, seeing him place his book down and raise his head to look at me.
“Trouble?” he asks and I walk closer to where he sits.
“I’m not sure yet!” I tell him and he sits back in his seat.
“The latest report should be in this afternoon, do you need to go back before?” he asks and if I could have waited for the report I would have preferred it, Oscar has sent out several men to gather the last information we are missing to get a complete picture of what’s going on and how many vampires it could be that have joined the rogues.
During these days we have found out there is a bigger problem than we thought and until now there isn’t an easy answer why the vampires have joined the rogues, we all suspect the rogue leader has
promised the vampires something in exchange for their help.
“Yes, I have to leave right now, I will call you once I get back!” I tell him when I see him get a frown on his face.
“Isn’t your mate going to portal you home?” he asks and there is no point in hiding it from him because I need to borrow a car from him to get back quickly.
“No, she won’t get a heads up I’m coming back!” I say when he smiles at me.
“I will have a car ready for you right away! And good luck with that mate!” he says. and gives me a wink.
“That would be good! I will have my men meeting me on the way and they won’t have to drive me all the way!” I say and turn around to head out of the library.
“Talk to you later! Have a nice trip back!” he says when I have reached the door.
I just give him a nod and walk out of the library to head over to my room and pack my clothes in my bag. Reaching my room I push the door open and pick up my phone to give my father a call, he should be in my office right now.
He answers on the second ring.
“I need you to send me a car over here to meet me up on the way!” I tell him once he has picked up.
“Something wrong?” he asks and starts to pick up my clothes and place them down in my bag.
“I don’t know yet! Something is going on with Selena and I have to get back right away! Tell them to step on it!” closing my bag and taking one extra look around the room so I haven’t missed anything when I hear a knock on the door and walk over to open it.
Outside is one of Oscar’s men and I guess he will be driving me back.
“We are ready to go once you are!” he says and I turn my attention back to my father on the phone.
“I’m going now! Get them on the road right now!” I order and walk over to grab my bag from the chair and turn around to head out of the room.
“It’s done! They will be going right away!” he says when I walk out of the door and follow after the driver.
“Good! Have them to call me on the way!” I say before we hang up the phone. Following after the driver out of the front door I see a black car being parked outside by the stairs, another man is standing and holding the door open when we walk down and reach over to it. Going inside I place my bag down on the seat beside me and hear them both walk around and get inside in the front.
When the car starts to move I sit back in my seat and look at the road, the drive will take a couple of hours and if they step on it I might be back in two hours. She better not be up to anything she shouldn’t or she will be in deep problems this time!
Hearing my phone beeping I unlock it and look at the message, it’s from my men who will meet me on the way. Seeing it’s Cannon’s favorites in the car I know the drive will go fast and it couldn’t be better.
“We will be meeting my men on the way, they will step on it!” I tell them even if they accelerate and drive down the road at a fast speed.
“Then let’s see who will get the furthest!” the driver says and I couldn’t have gotten better drives than this as of now, I will be there quicker than I anticipated!
I sit in silence for the whole ride when the car comes to a stop and my men are standing on the road outside the car, I’m not surprised they would be faster.
“Until next time we meet!” I say and get out of the car and shut the door closed before they get a chance to respond.
Walking over to my car I get right inside and place my bag on the floor, they both get inside and start to drive.
“You know where to go and step on it!” I say when I see the other car turn around and head the other way.
“As you which!” they say and the car accelerates to a high speed. Looking out the window I try to feel her through the bond the closer we get to her pack but I’m cut off from her.
There is no doubt she is up to something!
“Do you want us to contact Cannon!” I hear them ask but as for now, no one will get any heads up I’m on my way. I know we could probably reach him from here with a mind link but I will not reveal I’m on my way!
“No! I don’t want them to be alarmed before we have arrived!” I tell them when I get this weird feeling. I get this pull in one direction and I know without having talked to her she is in here.
“Stop the car!” I boom out and the car comes to a screeching halt!
Opening the door I get out and take off my suit and place it in the back seat.
“Wait here!” I tell them before shifting and running in her direction.
Chapter 128
Selena POV:
Coming out of the portal on the other side I see one of my men laying on the ground and he isn’t breathing any longer, I followed him over here when I felt where he was.
I already know he is dead before I reach over to where he is.
Falling to my knees when I’m by his side I see his neck has bite marks from a vampire and I can’t do anything for him.
He was one of the unmated warriors and a young shifter who joined my pack a couple of months ago, he was a great fighter and a nice man.
My heart goes out to him and I hate not being able to do anything about it.
Turning my head I start to look around but I don’t see anyone and since I can’t shift to my wolf I have to rely on the senses I’ve got.
I recognize the place I’m at and it’s a bit in the forest from my pack, from here we are on the opposite side from the cave where the rogues are most active.
I have to leave him here on the ground and come back for him later on once I have found the rest.
Fear starts to creep up my spine I’m too late for the others!
Getting up on my feet I look around when I slowly start to walk in one direction, have no idea where to go since Jacob and my pack warriors use the potion regularly I can’t smell them. My nose picks up a
faint trace of blood and I turn that way when I start to walk in that direction, trying to listen for any sound.
Walking for a bit I try to mind link Jacob without any result, he is cut off from me and I curse in my head for how stupid he has been going outside with a small group and not knowing what it is outside our barrier.
Coming to a clearing I stop in my track when I see two more of my men laying dead. on the ground, a sob leaves my lips and I’m frozen to my spot.
They are dead and by the sight of it there where killed by vampires, I feel how tears stay to prick behind my eyelids and run down my cheeks! I’m too lait!
“Well, well, what do we have here!” I hear a voice say and snap my head in that direction. Seeing two men comes walking out from the trees in front of me I already know they are vampires without being close to them, their black eyes and black veins under their eyes give them away.
Standing in my place and listening for more movement when it’s a bit off rustling to my side, my breath hitches in my body from the sight!
In front of me, they have Jacob on his knees and one other of my men. Both of them are in a bad shape and I fear they won’t make it much longer. The vampire who is holding them by their necks looks over at the one in front of me and I guess they are waiting for a signal to know what to do.
“I’m so sorry Selena! Don’t try and save me, get back instead!” comes Jacob’s voice through the mind link and I can’t let them do this!
“It looks like we hit Jackpot! Get rid of them we have what we need right in front of us!” I hear him say when my anger flares to life again, even if I can’t shift I can still pull on the gifts and do something. My
gift sizzles under my skin ready to be used when I see in slow motion how the vampires slit a cut over their throat and blood starts pulsating out.
My anger burst out from my body and it hits them like a shock wave, I know it will only have them out for a short moment but I take what I can.
I’m quick and start running over to where Jacob is laying on the ground, falling to my knees I see him fight for his life. Blood is running down his neck, and placing my hands over his wound I try to transfer some healing over to him but the gap is way too big and I need my wolf to be able and fix this properly.
I only get a short moment to try and heal him when I get hit from the side and a vampire is laying on top of me and trying to get to my neck.
Fighting with all I can to get him off me for a long moment, he is strong and without my wolf, I can’t put up much resistance. I don’t have the strength I need to fight him off much longer.
Trying to take a deep breath and gather as much I can to form an energy ball and blast him off me, I see him land a far bit away from me and that took more off me than I wanted. Trying to catch my breath and get up when he is right above me again and push me back down on the ground.
He grabs my arms and holds them in place to my side while I’m trashing
underneath him with the strength I got, I know what his intentions are when he suddenly disappears over me and all I got time to register is a black fur.
Turning my head to the side I can’t believe who it is when two others come and get right into the fight. Looking at Jacob I see his chest still rise and fall but my other warrior is lying dead on the ground.
I can’t let Jacob die from us without trying to save him!
Getting up on my feet I rush over to Jacob and place my hands on his neck and try to get it to stop bleeding, I have no energy left to try and heal him, I need my wolf to do it! As of now, all I can do is try and stop the bleeding and hope he will heal.
It only takes a short moment until Kian comes walking up beside me and stops right behind my back, I don’t know how he manages to get here but I’m grateful he is here and what others he has brought with him. Hearing someone grunt I believe they have killed all the vampires off.
“I need to get him back to the hospital!” I shout and try to hold my emotions under control.
“Why don’t you shift and heal him?” Kian says and I can’t explain it to him right now, need to get Jacob back.
“I can’t right now!” I say in a rush and open a portal to get him inside. Kian stands. behind me for a long moment while I get up and start to drag him. Kian walks up and grabs him from me, and starts to drag him over to the portal when I get inside!
Walking out on the other side I feel how my tears run down my cheeks when we walk right out in the hospital.
“We need help over here right now!” I scream out and look for a nurse who comes running with the doctor behind.
They instantly start to work on him and lift him on a stretcher and start to pull him away, I can’t follow after them or help him more when Kian walks up right in front of me.
I’m a mess and my emotions are everywhere; I couldn’t save them!
They are all dead because I didn’t lead them properly, I have failed them and my pack. A sob leaves my lips when I look down at my shaky bloody hands, my surroundings have faded away and all I have
fought for to try and keep my men and pack safe has failed!
I’m not a good Alpha to my people!
Feeling a hand shake my shoulders I raise my head and look right into Kian’s eyes when I hear Emma’s voice comes from behind and I turn my head that way when I see her walk inside with Cannon behind.
“Why didn’t you shift and got the vampire off you instead of trying to fight him off you in human form?” he booms out and I feel his anger. I feel ashamed by all of this and I didn’t only fail my pack, I failed him and our children by going out there and risking all of our lives even if I promised him to stay inside.
What kind of mother am I to not remember I’m pregnant and keep them safe? I risked their lives and mine by going after them the way I did. I’m just as stupid as the others who went out because I can’t contain my anger and think rationally before acting, I know whatever anger will come from Kian I deserve it all!
Turning my head back to meet his eyes I look right into them before telling him the truth.
“I’m pregnant!”
Chapter 129
Selena POV:
You could almost touch the thick tension in the room when I spoke the truth out loud, he looks me all over for a long time when I feel his mixed feelings through the bond before he cut me off completely.
I felt him shocked and happy before it turned to disappointment and anger in a short moment before he put his walls up.
I know he is disappointed at my actions and the anger I feel radiates out of him is what I deserve!
He takes a step closer to me when his eyes become pitch black and his rage almost takes my breath away.
“You’re pregnant and you risked our child’s life by going out there! You don’t give a f*ck about your own life or mine but you are even willing to have our child killed is the worse you ever could do!” he booms out and I hear Emma and Cannon take a step back. His anger washes over me and I start to sweat when he takes a step closer.
“Not once have you kept your promise but I never thought you could sink that low you even would risk killing our child!” he roars and grabs my arm hard before pulling me close to him, his face is close to mine and I can feel his claws dig in my arm. It’s painful but the rage coming from him is harder to try and breathe through, there is no point in hiding it any longer this has already gone downhill!
“Children!” I say in a shaky voice and feel how my tears are running down my cheeks in a steady stream, his anger is justified and I’m just as angry at myself for doing what I did. How could I forget I’m pregnant just like that and risk their lives?
“What?” he booms and I have to avert my eyes from his for a moment, I have a hard time breathing through his anger.
“Can you please try and calm down a bit!” I hear Emma say but it does nothing but only increase the tension in the room.
“Look at me!” he growls out and I have to fight the urge to not face him again. Taking a deep breath I look back at him and his eyes haven’t left my face.
“Children, there is more than one!” I say in a whisper when his eyes flicker for a moment and I feel him fighting his wolf from taking over and shifting right here.
“Kian you have to take it easy and let her go, you are hurting her!” I hear Emma say when a warm liquid is running down my arm and I know his claws have dug in harder into my arm cutting my arm open.
He holds me in place for a long moment before I see him having his wolf under control.
“You have disappointed me in ways I never thought it would be possible, you are not fit for being an Alpha and from this now you are no longer in charge of this pack!” he spits at me and I can feel the hate coming from him.
I do nothing to object against him, I don’t think I’m fit for being an Alpha at this moment either.
They are all dead because I didn’t lead them the way I should and hadn’t it been because I forced Jessie to come with me over to Michael she would probably be dead as well.
Both my Gamma and my Beta went against my orders, the two who are supposed to make sure my orders are being followed did just the opposite. I will not argue against him, I’m not fit for leading this pack.
He starts to walk and pull me with him without letting go of his grip on me when he is being stopped by Cannon.
“Kian you have to calm down!” he says when he only pushes him out of the way and starts to drag me out of the hospital. I let him do what he wants, my mind and feelings are clouded with disappointment over myself and guilt for what I did and haven’t done.
Outside the hospital, he starts to drag me over to the barrier and I have no idea what he is planning to do when Cannon gets in front of him to stop him from walking out.
“Kian calm down!” he says when Kian stops and looks at him, hearing someone running behind us I turn my head and see Declan and Jessie coming over. Turning back my head from them, Jessie is the last person I want to meet right now.
“Why weren’t you outside and help protect her? You had one job here and it was to make sure she where safe and inside this barrier while I where away! So where were you?” he booms out and they all fall silent. None of that is his men’s fault since I ordered them to stay inside.
“I ordered them to stay inside!” I say in a low voice, he is already angry at me and I know this won’t change anything. But if I can keep his anger away from them for nothing they could do anything about then I will.
He snaps his head and looks at me before he starts dragging me with him again. closer to the barrier.
“I will deal with all of you later!” he bombs out when I hear Jessie try to speak to me while he pulls me out on the other side. Seeing a black car standing on the road and two men leaning at the car he drags me closer to it.
They open the door and he pushed me inside and lets go of my arm, I hiss when his claws pull out of my skin.
“If you even think about portal away I will hunt you down and you will be in deeper problems!” he spits at me before he shut the door closed with a bang.
I’m not going anywhere!
This time I will stay and do what he says.
I hear them talking for a brief moment before they get inside the car and turning my head I see Kian takes a step back when they start to drive away. He shifts and starts to run into the forest with Cannon after him.
I have no idea where they are going and as of now, I’m on the edge of a breakdown.
Tears run down my cheeks when the car starts to move away on the road, I have nothing to say and just let my tears fall. Today I have disappointed everyone and including myself for not thinking rationally before handling it right!
The car ride goes in silence and I already know where he is taking me before we are there, I can’t blame him!
The car comes to a stop outside the Castle when they open the door for me to get out.
“I’m sorry for this my Queen!” one of them says and I get out of the car when he takes my arm in a gentle hold and starts to walk with me over to the Castle.
“it’s alright!” I say when we climb the stairs and walk inside. I hear the other one walk behind me when we come to stop outside the door to his cellar.
“We don’t want to do this but it’s the king’s orders!” he says and opens the door. Walking down the stairs we are back to the cell with the coated bars, silver, and wolfsbane if I remember correctly.
“It’s all right! I would probably have done the same!” I say when they open the cell door and I get inside.
“I will get you a soap and a towel for you to clean up the blood. Do you want anything to eat?” I hear them say but shake my head no at them. I’m not hungry even a bit, only tired all the way into my soul.
It takes a moment before he comes down again and walks inside with a towel and a tray of food and water in a bottle. They place the things inside on a chair before they head out and close the door after them.
“Give him a few hours and you will see he has calmed down! We will check on you. later!” one of them says and I don’t answer them, highly doubt he has calmed down if he ever will from this!
I hear them walk over to the stairs and start to climb them while I walk over and take a seat on the bed.
Looking down at my bloody hands they start to tremble, they are coated by his blood and I’m sure he didn’t make it!
Today I broke every trust Kian ever had in me and I have no one else to blame for this than myself, I have given him promises and never kept anyone of them. Today I could have gotten us killed!
Placing my hand on my stomach I’m grateful for Kian to show up when he did, have no idea what could have happened otherwise. He might never forgive me for this but I have someone else to keep fighting for.
“I’m going to fight for you!” I say and that’s what I’m going to do from now on, keeping our children alive and away from any harm.
Chapter 130
Selena POV:
I have been laying down here for the whole night, from time to time there has been someone down with a tray with food on and picked up the old one. I have no appetite but have tried to get some food down.
My mind is a mess and I have been crying from time to time down here in the darkness by myself.
He never came down and I didn’t expect him to either, what I did was reckless and unforgivable. I know that!
I have felt a link trying to get to me but I blocked them all out, not only because I didn’t have any energy left to talk to them I need some time alone after all this mess.
Turning my head to look out the small windows in the high ceiling it looks like it’s morning outside and I place my hand on my stomach, I guess it won’t take too long until I’m going to be able and feel a little baby bump.
Will he be with me on this journey or do I have to go through it alone?
Hearing the door open at the top of the stairs I hear two pairs of footsteps walking down the stairs. Turning my head to the side I find Emma and Cannon standing by the cell door and by the sight of it, Emma has cried a lot.
“He didn’t make it!” I state when tears start to run down my cheeks again. A sob leaves Emma’s lips and I turn my head and look up at the ceiling before closing my eyes and just letting my tears fall.
She already knew it before they came down here, this only makes it painfully real how I have failed him and lost my pack members.
“It’s not your fault, you couldn’t do anything!” Emma says and I open my eyes and sit up on the bed.
“I was supposed to be the Alpha and they would have been alive if I had been a better one! Nothing you can say about it will take away the fact my Beta and Gamma went against my orders and now he is dead with the others who went with him on that suicide mission!” I say and look at her when she tries to protest against it.
“It doesn’t matter Emma! What I did was as stupid as their actions. I ordered everyone to stay inside and went alone pregnant with our children, not being able to shift, and had no idea what I would come to face once I stepped out of that portal. I did this Emma!” I say and wipe off my tears while looking at her.
“I don’t think what they did is your fault! I can agree with you it was stupid to go after them alone but you can’t be punished this way! And you are pregnant!” she says and points at the bars.
“The bars won’t hurt me and just because I’m pregnant he keeps me inside here! He can’t trust me and I don’t blame him for it. I’m safe in here and can’t portal away! I wouldn’t be surprised if he keeps me in here during the whole pregnancy” I say to her when she walks closer and grab the bars.
Selena I will go and have a talk with him!” she says and I shake my head at her.
“There is no point! Let him be” I tell her when the door is opened on the top of the stairs again and some guards are walking down and stop beside Cannon.
“You have to leave! Kians orders!” one of the says and Emma turns to look at the
“Where is he?” she says to Cannon when she lets go of the bars and takes a step over to him.
“He is in his office!” I hear Cannon say when he starts to pull her with him.
“I will come back!” Emma says and looks at me when they start to head up the stairs. I sigh and turn my head to look at the other guards when they close the door on the top.
“We have orders to take you upstairs so you can take a shower and change clothes, I suggest you do as he says! Haven’t seen him this angry before!” one of the guards says and they don’t have to worry I won’t be going anywhere from here.
“I will!” I say to them when they open the door to the cell and I start to get out. A shower would feel nice and some clean clothes after all this.
One of them walks ahead of me and the other behind, climbing the stairs we come out in the hallway when they show me up the next stairs. Up here are Kian’s chambers which I know of.
Reaching the top of the stairs we start to walk down the hallway when we walk past his chambers and the door is slightly open. Inside there are several men and cleaning people carrying broken furniture, I instantly feel worse at the sight of it. I never wanted to hurt him this way!
Turning my head from the sight I keep my head down on the floor and keep walking after the other. He stops right in front of a door and opens it, looking inside I see it’s a large guestroom.
“Everything you need is inside and we will be waiting for you outside!” he says when I take a step into the room. Turning my head, I give them a nod before closing the door after me!
Waking further inside I see my clothes laying on the bed and nothing comes from him, I miss him terribly and I know if I could only wear one of his shirts it would calm me a bit. Sighing I start to head over to the bathroom and open the door before walking inside.
Pulling my shirt over my head before I take off my pants and underwear, placing them on the sink before I walk over to the shower and turn the water on. It takes only a few seconds for the warm water
to come and I instantly get under it.
Yesterday and the night have drained me of all my energy and right now I walk on autopilot, I do what I’m supposed to but could easily just sleep away the whole day. The warm water feels good on my body when I start to wash my hair and body. slowly, taking my time in the shower before I will be down into the cold cellar again.
When I’m done I let the water run down my body a moment before turning it off and stepping outside, wrapping a towel around me I head over to the mirror and look at my reflection. I’m pale and got red puffy eyes from all this crying, I look like. the wreck I feel I am.
Walking out of the bathroom I find a pair of pants on the bed and a shirt with some underwear prepared for me, drying my body on the towel I start to pull my clothes. on before wrapping the towel around my hair.
I am about to put on my shoes when there is a knock on the door and it is opened, one guard is walking inside the room.
“Are you ready? You have an appointment in a short moment!” he says and looks at me. Stopping in my place I look at him with a frown on my face.
“Where am I going?” I ask him while taking the towel off my hair.
“You have an ultrasound appointment in fifteen minutes!” he says and I can’t move from my place when I see the other guard step inside the room.