Ch. 171..175: The Werewolf's Vampire Mate Chapter 171-175

Chapter 171: Everything is not what it seems

Cassius.

Beau is the most selfless person I have ever met. If the tables were turned, I wouldn’t have given him this chance and now thinking about it, I suddenly hate the person I became after losing Gyles. I hate that I killed all those people.

No matter what transpired, I shouldn’t have taken things so far and maybe thinking back to it all is pointless. What is done, is done but I can’t help but be grateful to him and his act of kindness. He is a wolf, the kind I hate so much, and he helped me. he is doing a request that I don’t deserve.

He is a better person than I ever will be.

I guess dying is the best punishment for me and I have accepted my fate. I just need to know what happened to him, but I need to find out. If I have to get into his head tonight and see it all, that Is what I am going to do. they took him, didn’t kill him but killed the rest of the family.

Why did they spare him?

They must have had a reason.

I grab him by his hand, and he flinches against my touch. Beau didn’t even tie me up again. he is trusting me one last time and I don’t intend on breaking that trust. Gyles has always been the most important person in my life and when he died. I didn’t have anything I was living for and that is why I acted out so much. Now that he is alive again. I will not do anything to mess this up.

’’Come on,’’ I urge him to a corner of the basement.

This is not the worst place I have ever stayed in. I have lived in worst conditions but somehow, this place seems like paradise, just because he is here. ’’I need you to remember me. I need you to be okay before I die,’’ I tell him as we both sit down on the cold ground. I look at him and a smile crawls to my face. he looks exactly like he did all those years back. Nothing has changed about him. He is still the perfect man I once loved.

The silence is eerie.

I expect him to call my name. tell me a funny joke like he used to but I know it is not going to be that easy. I have a couple of hours with him. in the span of those minutes and seconds, I plan on getting to the bottom of it all. I plan on bringing him back to the man he was.

If I have to use the last shred of energy left in me. I will not die without knowing the truth.

What do you plan on doing with the truth?

The voice in my head asks me.

I don’t know. I am done taking revenge. I am tired of fighting. maybe it’s just seeing him here. The fact that I can hold him again. Gyles doesn’t fight me when I touch him. he might not remember me but his body still knows my touch.

’’You need to remember me, Gyles. I am dying.’’ I breathe out those words, unsure of what else I could possibly say to bring him back.

The blank stare he has just remains on his face. I release a sigh of frustration. ’’We were best friends a long time ago. You were my everything.’’

It is very hard talking about all this, but this is the only person that makes it easy. He is the only person I can completely pour my heart out too. He is the only one I want. fuck, I just realised something. Life fucking sucks. Why couldn’t he come into my life sooner? When I still had a chance of being saved. Now it is too late, and he is here.

This fucking sucks.

’’Whenever you feel like the world is closing in on you. Remember me, remember all that we shared and know that even if I am not next to you, I will always be in your heart. That will never go away.’’

I remember one of the last things he told me and suddenly I am not spiralling as hard anymore. His legs are crossed together. The sight in front of me is adorable and I can’t help but smile at him and all that he is.

’’Can I get into your head; do you give me permission?’’ I slide closer to him as I ask him. my legs go around his body as I pull him closer. I am still in pain; this is very hard for me but somehow there is this zeal within me that is blocking out all the pain. I can only focus on him and ignore everything else. I have until the sun comes up.

He doesn’t respond but I see his eyes as they flicker. I take that as my response and place both hands on his temples again. the last time I got into his head, I showed him something. This time, I want him to show me. The only way I will be successful in this is if he gives me consent. That is the only way it will work. I cannot force my way into his head. I close my eyes and the room suddenly becomes quieter. The only sounds are our heavy breathing. I focus on his breathing because the sound is like music to my ear.

The normal spinning starts, the fact that we are at this stage just means that something is happening. He is letting me in.

Fuck yes.

Darkness transpires into light, and light transpires into a memory. A room, just like the one we are in now. Dingy and dark. I look around and it is empty. It feels like I am sitting down on a chair. Whatever this is, is Gyles memory, so he is the one sitting down. I try to move my hands, but it feels like they are tied to something.

’’Help,’’ I hear his voice. God, I have missed his voice so much and even though it sounds like he is in pain, it feels like music to my ears.

This is the memory. The one that will explain everything to me. the one that will show me what the fuck happened to him. why that attack happened in the first place. Finally, I will have the answers to all the fucking questions running through my head.

He shouts even louder, this time the door in front of us opens and a man walks inside. He has a bag of blood in his grip as he walks towards us. there is a smile on his face as he goes on one knee with the bad in front of me—or should I say, Gyles. Since this is his memory.

’’You don’t realise how long we have been looking for you and here you are now.’’ His smile widens. I don’t feel any threat coming from him. he seems like an Ally and not an enemy.

’’Why are you doing this to me?’’ Gyles asks.

’’Because you are important to us. you are all that matters.’’

He tries to budge out from the chair, but the chains are too tight. It is hard to break free from them ’’You have to stop fighting Gyles. We are not here to hurt you.’’

I believe him. it doesn’t seem like he wants to hurt him.

’’What did you do to my family?’’

The man’s smile wipes out of his face and is replaced with an angry scowl ’’They were not your family. Those monsters don’t deserve to be called that.’’

’’They are not monsters. They are the only people that matter.’’

’’You don’t know the full story. You don’t know all the things they did to you. To our family. You were just a baby. How were you supposed to know?’’

’’What are you talking about?’’

the man stretches his hand out and gives him the blood ’’We were too late. They made you one of them. There is no going back from that.’’ he pauses and tears the nylon of the bag ’’Drink this.’’ he forces the bag into his mouth. it feels like I am drinking it with him. I feel one with him right now.

Gyles drinks until there is nothing left and all the strength in him resurfaces. ’’Who are you?’’ he asks the man in front of him.

This time, he smiles again ’’I am your father,’’ he tells him and my heart races in my chest from those words.

Before I can see more, I feel the push. The send away and with that my eyes open and Gyles has that same expression on his face. The tears welling up in his eyes. That was a memory. After they killed everyone, they took him to wherever that was. It doesn’t make any sense to me but I remember Gyles telling me that the Brightwood family found him when he was just a baby.

Is that really what happened?

I don’t even know anymore.

Chapter 172: Sex with a hybrid

Darrien.

’’Okay, thanks, man. So, everything is cool now?’’ I end the call and Jabi stares at me with curiosity. It has just been a couple of hours, but I already feel like the walls in this bunker are closing in on me. I want to be out of here and in my bed, in Jabi’s arms.

He pulls me closer to him and I wrap my arms around his waist. The comfort I get from him is unsurpassable. I doubt I will ever feel the same way with anyone again. this is the end game for me. having someone like him in my arms.

’’Can we go home now?’’ he asks me with that puppy dog stare I love.

I nod my head because Eligio just called me with the good news. The fact that Beau handled Cassius on his own is impressive to me. I didn’t think he could. He always seemed a little in his head to me. the confidence wasn’t there, and I thought this was going to leaf to a lot of deaths, but I am glad that everything is okay now. I don’t even want to go back to the pack. I just want to take Jabi to my apartment and I want us to start our life together.

’’We won?’’

I nod again and he jumps out of my arms and on the bed. I look up at him as he celebrates in his own way. The joy in his eyes. Everything about him just calls out to me. I am the luckiest man on the earth.

’’We can go home,’’ he exclaims over and over again. once he is done, he jumps back into my arms and I wrap them around him tightly.

’’Where is home for you?’’ I ask him because I need to know.

He furrows his brows in confusion ’’What do you mean?’’ he asks me.

I repeat my question ’’Where do you want to call home?’’

He smiles into my arms. His head on my chest. I am sure he can hear the beating of my heart. I am also sure he knows that it is beating for him. I wait for him to answer me and it takes about five seconds to get a response from him.

’’Wherever you are.’’

That was the answer I was looking for but I also want to know what he wants. If he wants to remain in the pack, I can’t refuse him. like I keep saying, I am living my life for him and him alone. From the moment I became one with him, I do everything to make him happy. To bring a smile to his face. An unhappy Jabi will lead to an unhappy Darrien.

’’But where do you want that to be. do you want to remain in the pack? Do you feel like leaving would be a bad idea for you?’’

I feel like after meeting me, he found his place, but it will never be the same. Even though he is a hybrid now, he will always be a wolf and a wolf without a pack is an unhappy wolf. I don’t want to do anything that will in turn make him unhappy.

I can survive anywhere.

’’You want us to live in the community?’’ he asks.

I shrug ’’I want us to live where you want us to live.’’ I pause and he waits for me to continue ’’Where do you want to live?’’

’’I don’t know.’’

’’Okay, I want you to think about it. I don’t want to do anything that will make you unhappy. Let’s do the best thing for you.’’

I don’t want to put pressure on him but from his answer, I can tell that he has some uncertainty roaming through his mind and that means he might want to stay in the pack. I will not let him stay in the condition that he was in. If I have to talk to Beau, then I will. The man needs to get his shit together. He can’t keep on treating the omegas like they are inconsequential. They are a very important part of the pack and I want things to change.

’’You will agree to stay in the community for me?’’

I nod my head ’’I will only do what makes you happy. So, if you are not happy there, then we don’t have to.’’

He leans forward and presses his lips to mine. My grasp around his waist tightens as he climbs on top of me, deepening the kiss. A lot of things have happened in this short amount of time that I will never take back. Jabi grinds his waist into mine and a moan escapes my lips from the shock of his forwardness. I like it when he takes control, it drives me insane.

I look away from him as he tugs the ropes of my pants ’’Are you sure about this?’’ I ask him, looking at the door. it’s not like anyone will barge in on us but I don’t know if sex with all that has happened is a good idea. We still haven’t figured out him and his new strength. I am not worried anymore because if the new him brings him new abilities and he can protect himself with said abilities, then I am happy.

His eyes shine, and the bright blue that comes out shows. I know this is the vampire side of him. the one that gets bloodthirsty. The one that helps him become stronger. I haven’t really had a connection with this side of him and I know it is something I need to work on. I fell in love with Jabi as a wolf and he will always be a wolf to me but there is another part of him that is crying out to me for acceptance.

I guess this is my opportunity to accept all of him wholeheartedly. His attempt to get my pants off become a success and I do the same for him. grabbing his dick through his boxers. He pulls his head back from my touch and a smile forms on his face, revealing his teeth. His fangs are out.

Fucking beautiful If I must admit.

My eyes stay fixed on him as I start to rile him up with soft strokes. My eyes never leave him, I like the sight in front of me. I like the reaction I am getting from touching him. His legs tremble as I go faster, wanting him to get that needed release. His moans are hushed, I know he is trying to be quiet and maybe I want him to lose control. I can’t wait to be alone with him. At my apartment, he wouldn’t have to control or hide his moans and screams. He can completely let loose.

With my other hand, I reach for his entrance, not stopping my strokes. His eyes close and I watch him as two of my fingers go into him at the same time. He bites his lips in an attempt to stop the noise but the sound that he tried to stop comes out in full play. This gets a satisfied smile from me. Glad that he is weak to my touch. My strokes get faster until I feel him stiffen against me, before he has the opportunity to cum, I stop the strokes and dive into him immediately.

He screams loudly from the shock of my actions. I am a little rough but I know he can take it. my baby can take anything. ’’don’t stop,’’ he pleads in a desperate cry.

I smile. Like I said before, he can take anything. My dick hardens inside him as it enjoys the familiarity of him. I move slowly at first, wanting him to get used to the size, he grabs my waist in an attempt to get me deeper. I plunge into him on command, letting out a soft cry. The minute I hit that spot, I feel it in my tip. Jabi moans from the pleasure as I satisfy him in ways only I can. God, I want to remain buried in him for the rest of my life. We keep moving, I am almost at my limit but I don’t want this to end. I wish I could drag this for as long as possible. Slightly raising my head back, I smash my lips on his. The kiss is desperate and full of hunger. His hands shudder as I plunge even deeper, completely merging out bodies together.

Jabi pushes into me harder than I thought he could handle. The man he has become is so admirable to me. our lips separate and his fangs come out even more. I watch him, still inside him and moving as he reaches for the crook of my neck. I watch as he places his mouth, on the skin, knowing full well what he is about to do. I don’t stop him. the euphoric bliss that comes with his bite hits me as he pierces my skin with his fangs. The liquid texture that is my blood spills out to the side of my neck.

Jabi is drinking my blood right now and it a major turn on. With his mouth in action, I fasten my movement. Almost at the point of bliss. He cries a little as I hit that spot again but doesn’t stop drinking. This is supposed to make me feel weak, but it only makes me stronger. We both cum at the same time and with that, he pulls out of my neck and falls on me, breathing heavily.

I close my eyes as I wrap my arms around him, not sure what just happened. It was instinctual for him—to drink my blood.

Is this his new normal?

Chapter 173: Assumptions kills a man

Cassius.

His memory stays engraved in my mind for a couple of minutes. I want to go back into his head but I also know it will be overwhelming for him. He let me in on his own but I know I had to dig deep to get to that point in his life. He doesn’t want to remember. That is why he is this sleep/awake state. With vampires, we can stay for a thousand years asleep and wake up like it was just yesterday but Gyles isn’t asleep. He is awake but not really present.

The only thing I can do is find the part of his consciousness that is choosing to be asleep and try and wake him up. The wolves that took him. The people that killed our family, they are now claiming to have been related to him. It just doesn’t make any sense to me.

’’We’re going to take a break,’ I tell him, my eyes open now and on him.

We are so close to each other, that I can smell him. He even smells the same. It seems like nothing has really changed about him. He is still the same man that I once loved. God, it is uncanny.

He watched me but doesn’t say anything. I don’t mind the silence. As long as I can be with him and touch him. That is all that matters. I know that deep down, he is still there. He is still the same man I once loved. ’’I wish you’d remember me. That would be the best dying gift.’’

I keep my eyes on him, wanting to see if I will get a reaction from him but his stare is still blank and uninterested. Please, Gyles, come back to me. Let me help you. I beg silently. Maybe the deities, those invisible forces that put me through all this will listen and make things better.

I can feel my life slipping away. I don’t know how much longer I have left but I just want to spend it with him. If I can just stay here with him until I die, I will get the satisfaction I need.

’’You know, I never stopped thinking about you. You were my only reason for living.’’

The stare is all I get after my confession. Not like I was expecting more from him. I close my eyes again as I take a deep breath. This is harder than I thought it would be. I feel his hand, unexpectedly on my face and this makes me open my eyes from the shock. He is watching me, still quiet but his expression is different. I have always been able to read Gyles’s eyes. From his eyes, I usually know how he is feeling and at this moment. The sadness is pouring out of his eyes. It is heartbreaking to me. All this while, he has been on his own; suffering in pain. I have been so focused on anger and violence. I didn’t think that there was a possibility that he was alive.

His hand brushes against my face. His eyes are moist. He has cried a lot in the span of about an hour. I want him to continue because I want to get a reaction from him. I want him to recognize me and remember. Our legs are still around each other. I can feel all of him but I just want to get closer to him. He slides his hand downwards until his fingers brush against the bite injury. The one caused by all my anger. I blame myself solely for this and no one.

His hand remains on it, I watch him, unsure of what is going on in his head. He looks pained to see me like this. Does he remember me?

Did my efforts work?

"Gyles," I call his name, it travels through the quiet room. The sound, full of desperation and longing. A drop of tear falls from his face, I reach for his face to wipe it off. He lets go of my face and grabs the hand on him. My hands freeze. This is the most contact I have had with him but I can’t even revel on the touch because my mind leaves my body and somehow, I am taken back into a memory.

This time is different. I don’t even know where I am. It doesn’t feel like I am in someone’s mind. My eyes shift around the place, confusions and worry-filled inside me. Gyles took me here, on his own. I didn’t have to do anything, so he must want to show me whatever this is. i am in an open space, slowly turning back, I see the pathway to the woods. Is that the direction I should head to?

The compound is quiet. To me, it looks like Beau’s community. Maybe not exactly the same, but there is this familiarity that is dawning on me.

"What are you trying to show me? What is here?" I mumble to myself wanting to know the reason for this. Not before long, two men come into view. They walk past me, not even noticing my presence. I know the drill with these memories. This has to be someone’s memory. It might not be Gyle’s memory but someone must have shown him whatever I am seeing.

That is the only way I would be seeing this.

’’It’s time,’’ the man tells the other one. I recognize one of the men from the previous memory Gyles showed me. This is his father, or at least, this is the man that claims to be his father.

The man smiles, his eyes have a shine to it. There is genuine happiness in them. I don’t know what is happening but the excitement in his eyes is beautiful ’’I am so nervous. I can’t believe I am going to be a father,’’ he screams with joy. They walk away, and I follow them until they get to a house and enter immediately. They continue walking until they get to a room ’’Fuck, this is real,’’ the man runs his hands through his hair, the nervousness spilling out of him. He rests his hand on the knob of the door "You’ve got this brother,’’ the other guy tells him. I watch the scene. I already know what is happening.

The memory ends once the door is closed and I am taken somewhere else. The other man is in a room. There is a woman on the bed. She looks very exhausted. She is probably the one that just gave birth.

"You look tired,’’ the man breathes out.

The woman smiles "The best night of my life,’’ her eyes shift to the cot by the bed. I walk over to it, there is a sleeping baby in there. This must be the baby. Where is the father?

"You are the only one that would think this way Beth, no other woman would be excited to give birth.’’ The man chuckles, his eyes never leaving the woman. I don’t know what is going here but he is looking at her like he is in love.

This is not the father, so he is not with her.

"Fenris was so nervous when he heard you were in labour,’’ he announces. I gather that Fenris is the father.

"He is nervous about everything.’’

They both laugh at her statement. I can’t help but smile. The conversation is calm, the kind that goes on between two friends. This is a normal relationship.

"Do you want to hold him?’’ Beth asks.

The man shakes his head immediately "I am afraid she will fall if I attempt that,’’ he refuses immediately. Beth leans over and brings the baby out. His eyes open and his little toes squiggle "Come on. Don’t tell me the big bad wolf can’t carry a baby.’’ She wraps the baby in her arms, looking at the man.

He stands up and stops next to the bed "You just fold your arms just like I am doing, makes sure he is secure,’’ she tells him and he obeys her instructions.

"You’re doing it, Rollin,’’ she exclaims once the baby is in his arms.

I smile at the sight in front of me. "What are you gonna call him?’’ Rollin asks her.

She looks up at him as he pets the baby "We are thinking Gyles. Fenris is not too keen on it yet but I am still trying to convince him,’’ she smiles, the admiration in her eyes. Rollin smiles, as the baby grabs his index finger for a squeeze.

"Gyles is a beautiful name,’’ he agrees.

I smile because I agree to. This is the love of my life when he was a baby. He was a wolf. A fucking werewolf. The kind I hated more than anything.

Suddenly the memory disappears and I am back in the dark room, my heart beating like crazy. This is the most painful memory he has shown me and I still don’t know what happened yet. Gyles lost everything to the vampires. All this while I have thought eradicating the wolves would save the world but I was wrong.

I was so wrong.

Chapter 174: Memories

Cassius.

"Are you sure about this?"

I look around the room. I have been transported so many times that I am starting to lose track of anything. It seems like Gyles is showing me everything. Flooding it all on me, I don’t know if I can handle it all. I don’t even understand what is going on.

"This is the only way I can have her. That baby is her life.’’ Rollin speaks up. There are two men in this room and I recognize them both. Rollin and the man I called father for two years. This is the man that was supposed to turn me.

How is this even possible?

"We are talking about a baby, you can’t be serious.’’

Rollin frowns, the look on his face, screams impatient. Like he wants to get this over with. I don’t even know what they are talking about but it seems like a deal that wouldn’t end well. Rollin is a wolf, Macaly is a vampire. Why would a wolf and a vampire be making a deal? This is way before the contention. This is a long time ago. The more Gyles shows me, the more confused I am. I don’t even know what to think anymore.

"You owe me, after all these years, it is the least you can do.’’ Rollin reminds the man I mourned. When the whole family died. I was beside myself. They took me in when I had nothing when I was just a little kid in the streets. Even though they had to take a lot of convincing from Gyles. When I went back to the house, I could smell them. Their burnt bodies. The ash that they had become. I didn’t have a close relationship with them, I was still getting to know them, unlike Gyles. He lived for them. Somehow, he felt like he owed his life to Macaly. When he left me, he left because of the promise he made to them. If he had followed me that night, nothing would have happened to him. We would have been together, happy.

"This is very dangerous. You are asking me to attack a pack. How do you expect me to survive this?’’ The man I once called father, asks.

I watch the scene in front of me. There is confusion in my mind because Rollin was with Beth—Gyles’s mother. He cares about her, so how could he possibly be planning this right now. Why would he do this?

"I will help, this doesn’t have to be an attack. All you have to do is go to the community when I tell you and take the baby, you have to kill him.’’

Kill him?

What the fuck?

"I can’t kill a baby,’’ Macaly objects, his voice shaking.

I never got the evil vibe from him. I lived with them for two years and I never saw him as a monster. He is not going to agree to this. He won’t kill an innocent child. He will refuse this. I am so sure of it. I don’t want to believe this.

"You owe me." Rollin reminds him again. He seems to be doing that a lot. Reminding him that he has no choice.

I see the defeated look in his eyes. Before he agrees to it, I see it in his expression. I know he is not backing down and there is nothing I can say or do because I am not really here.

"Tomorrow at midnight,’’ Rollin informs him.

I watch the scene play out like a thief in the night. I can’t say or do anything to make this better. If I could change the past. Undo all the damage I have done. Convince Gyles to follow me that night. All this wouldn’t have happened. I wouldn’t be dying, with anyone by my side.

We would have been happy.

It is too late to change the past.

There is no way that can be done.

I close my eyes and in that instant, I am back in the basement and Gyles is in front of me. His eyes are open. It seems like he has been watching me for a while. I raise a brow wanting to know if he is there. Is he back to normal? Does he remember me? I have so many unanswered questions and I don’t know how to breathe them out into words.

"Gyles,’’ I blurt out his name. It rolls out of my tongue like soft butter. The name I love, the name I will never forget.

His stretches his hand out, my eyes stay on his face as I hope and silently pray for validation. I would die a happy man, knowing he is okay. Knowing he is sane and living well. I wouldn’t want him to dwell on us. I wouldn’t want him to think about me and have anger towards it all.

"Please let me know you’re here.’’ I plead with so much desperation in my voice. His hand rests on my face. His eyes flicker, still on my face. I can feel him here, the old Gyles I know. He shifts his body forward, we are so close. Our faces are just like an inch apart. God, he will be the death of me. I watch him, unsure of what he plans to do. It feels like he wants to kiss me. Oh, what I would do to get a kiss from him.

His fingers go around my face, his legs are pressing on mine. Everything is overpowering on me. I don’t know how to handle it all. I just wish he would talk to me. Tell me that everything is going to be alright. Somehow, it feels like Gyles brings out that little boy in me. The helpless child that only had one person.

"R..ro..Roger,’’ he breathes out my name very softly. It is almost inaudible. My heart screams from that sound. This is everything I wanted, but I am not even given the chance to react or even contemplate what is happening because the next thing I know, his lips are on mine with so much force that I fall to the floor, my back hitting the cold ground roughly. He doesn’t give me any chance to even breathe, he feels hungry. I like every bit of this. Kissing me means he remembers which means he is back. My heart thuds against my chest as his tongue slides into my mouth. In all our time together, he has never kissed me like this, with so much energy, anger, fucking frustration. It feels amazing. Sturdily, his tongue slides into my mouth. It sends chills down my spine. I grab him by his waist, he presses into me. Our bodies have now meshed together. It is insane.

I can’t stop.

I don’t even want to stop.

I can’t say how long we stay in that position, making out like kids that have been starved from each other for a long time. You can’t blame me, it has been years since I have been with anyone. I have imagined this moment for so long. Thought about my dying day. How I will be reunited with him in the afterlife. I wanted his touch, I wanted to see him smile, laugh. So badly. Now he is here and he remembers me. I know what happened to him. How someone betrayed his mother. They took him from his family, I don’t have the rest but he should know it. It was all his memories, which means he knows everything. After a while, after what feels like an eternity, he pulls back from me slowly, and I see the tears in his eyes. I don’t know what he is thinking but the sadness is unlike anything I have ever seen. It completely takes over me and gets to my skin.

"Roger,’’ he calls my name again. I can never tire of hearing him call my name. it has become my favourite sound on earth. "You’re here,’’ he cries, I reach for him and wipe the tears as they fall.

"I’m here,’’ I assure him.

I am here but I am dying. The more time I spend with him, the weaker I am. I feel so fucking shitty right now. I brought him back, with all those memories, only to be leaving him again. This is the worst thing I can do to someone. It even feels worse than all those people I killed.

Fuck, I killed so many people.

I guess it is all coming to me now. This is the regret Beau mentioned. The revelation of all my actions. I can see it now. "I thought I was never going to see you again." he continues. My heart breaks completely, I am here but not for long. how do I say that to him without breaking his heart further?

I don’t even know what to say.

How to make things better.

He jumps into my arms, this time, wrapping his around my waist for a hug. I breathe in his scent. I want to take his moment with me.

I want to remember this.

Chapter 175: Mind over matter

Cassius.

He stays in my arms all night.

I feel the mental clock ticking.

Once the sun comes out, he will leave and this will be over.

I mean this is what I wanted. This is what I asked for. I asked for a night, beau gave me a night. The night is almost over and as time passes by, my heart throbs in my chest. I don’t think I am ready to let him go. It will be selfish if I ask for one more day. I want more time with him—even though I don’t deserve it. Asking for more time will just prove that nothing has changed.

I killed so many people, this is my punishment. Maybe all along it was mapped out. This was always how it was meant to end.

"Why are you here?" Gyles asks in the dead of the night. His voice is low but it seems like he has gotten more of himself in a couple of hours. The more time he spends in my arms, the more he seems like himself. Lucinda kept him away from me. They had him and she kept him away from me, I could’ve been with him. I could’ve helped him.

’’It’s a long story,’’ I don’t want to tell him that I am basically a prisoner. That after he died, I got so angry and used all the hate I had in me to kill all those people.

He pulls away from me and this time, I see his eyes as they roam around the room. His eyes stop at the chains on the floor. He doesn’t stop looking. I don’t know what he is thinking but I need to know. I don’t want him to hate me like the rest of the word. He is the only one that matters and I need him right now more than ever.

"What have you done Roger’s,’’ He breathes out.

My heart breaks, I can see the disappointment in his eyes. He already knows, even though I haven’t said anything. Gyles always knew about my anger. He could see it in me—even when I was a child but he was always there to calm the nerves. He left and I went out of control.

For the first time in God knows how long, tears fall out of my face. The sincere one. The one that tugs on my heartstrings.

The pain of all my action.

’’I am so sorry,’’ I breathe out the apology that I should have a long time ago. He doesn’t know what I am talking about but he knows it is pretty bad. He knows that there is no hope for me.

He grabs me immediately, as I break down from everything that has happened. I feel the sharp pain as soon as it happens. I don’t know why it is happening now but the sting from the bite is so sharp that at that moment, in his arms.

I blackout.

**********************

Alanis.

I don’t know if it is my head but there is a loud cry that wakes me up. We were supposed to be guarding the basement. That is why we are still in the empty house but I guess we were both exhausted. As long as I am in his arms, I let go of everything.

I jump up from the bed but beau doesn’t even flinch. He must be very tired. I mean, he has been through so much. He deserves all the sleep he wants. I hear the sound again and this time, I get up from the bed. It sounds like it is coming from the basement. A cry so loud that I don’t even know what could be happening. Deep down, I know Cassius is not going to try and escape. He has a lot that he is dealing with right now. I can totally imagine what must be going through his head. He thought he lost Gyles and to find out that the guy is still alive must be heartbreaking. He completely focused on the wrong thing. He should have been looking for the guy but he ended up being a monster and killing all those people.

He is going to die.

No matter what.

I walk into the door of the basement and the sight before me is exactly what I expected. I knew he was going to die, I could feel him fading away but I didn’t expect it to be so quick.

"Help,’’ Gyles looks up. Cassius is in his arms, he is unconscious but I still smell his scent. He is not dead but he is barely alive.

"he is dying,’;’ I tell him because this is the best thing.

The fact that Gyles is responding, means Cassius saved him. He brought him back to his senses.

That is a good thing.

He gave the kid a chance to survive.

’’That’s impossible. He is a vampire. I can sense him.’’ He cries.

I walk over to them, my eyes searching for a way to explain this to him better. He needs to grasp the situation. There is nothing I can do to save him.

’’Please help him... please,’’ Gyles begs.

My heart cries but I actually want him to die. It is the best thing for everyone. We have all been through too much because of this man. He doesn’t deserve to breathe for another second.

"You’re not helping. Why aren’t you helping him,’’ he shouts so loud that the sound is deafening. His eyes are full of tears. He is crying and there is nothing I can do.

’’I’m sorry,’’ I apologize because this is the only thing I can do. There are no words to say. I don’t know how he is feeling but this is the only thing I can offer. My sincere apology.

"Give him your blood, it will help him,’’ he informs me with a glare. His eyes turn red at his words. The confidence in his demand is shocking. Does he think I will just obey him just because he tells me to?

"I won’t do that,’’ I tell him blatantly.

This is the moment we have been waiting for. I didn’t want to say anything to Beau but I wished he had killed him on the field. To me, all this was unnecessary and now we have Gyles involved in this.

Will he back off easily?

"Now,’’ he shouts so loud that I am sure Beau would wake up from the sound. He lets go of Cassius and stops in front of me, grabbing the collar of my shirt roughly. I am not afraid of him. This is someone that didn’t even utter a word for a couple of hours. He is not a threat to me.

"Don’t do anything you will regret,’’ I warn him.

His eyes are still red, which means his abilities are working. I don’t know what his deal is but I am ready to kill him too if he becomes a threat to me. "Give him your blood now,’’ he glares at me, his tone firmer.

In that second, he lets go of me and I feel my legs move on their own. What the fuck is going on? I try to stop it but it doesn’t work. It feels like I am being controlled.

I stop in front of Cassius. His body looks paler.

"What did you do?’’ I ask him.

I know what it is but he is making me do this. My body is not my own anymore. "Don’t do this,’’ I plead. I don’t know what my blood will do for him. I doubt it will save him but he must have a reason for asking me to do this. He must think this will work.

I raise my hand up—against my will. I am still looking at him. Pleading with my eyes that he will come to his sense.

"Just do it. Save him.’’ He tells me.

I don’t say anything, as my fangs come out. I bite my skin off and the blood spills out of my wrist. The only person I have given my blood to is Beau and now he is making me do this to the one person I hate. I reach for Cassius and place my hand on his lips. This is it. I am going to do this.

Fucking hell.

"What the fuck,’’ I hear Beau. I knew he would wake up. His eyes are on me, confusion spread on his face "What are you doing Lanis,’’ he asks in confusion.

"Now,’’ Gyles screams so loud, his voice travels through my ear until it sends shockwaves to my veins.

My blood is his mouth in the same moment beau runs to stop it. "Don’t let him stop you,’’ Gyles warns me. I know Beau won’t hurt me but I wish he would at this moment. The best thing to do is knock me out. That is the only way he will be able to break this spell or whatever the fuck this is but he doesn’t do that.

It is too late.