Ch. 646..650: The Werewolf's Vampire Mate Chapter 646-650

Chapter 646: Spread love

Alanis

"Leave and we won’t call the cops. You have a chance to just walk away right now.’’

I haven’t even done anything to them.

We are just having a conversation. Why are they so fucking terrified?

"What if I don’t want to leave? what if I am not don’t with this conversation?’’ I ask him calmly.

I am so calm through this situation because I know what I came for. I know why I am here.

"Do you know that your son hurt mine? did he tell you that?"

His eyes open wide, not from shock. there is something else in his eyes. I just don’t know what it is. I don’t care about what he feels right now. I don’t care about anything that concerns this man.

"I have a right to tell my son who he can be friends with,’’ he scowls at me angrily.

He is right.

"Yes, you do,’’ I tell him, stopping in front of him. my hands reach for his face. I have half a mind to just kill him. I don’t want to but there is just a part of me that is so upset. So upset that I am contemplating murder.

I won’t do it.

But I want to.

’You have a right to do that but when your son calls my son names and hurts him. I get angry and I don’t like it when I get angry.’’ I am holding his face in my grip and it is not a gentle grip.

Somehow, I want to see him bleed.

He can’t fight me back.

As long as I have this control. He can’t fight me back.

"What is he talking about honey. Why would you tell Max that?" his wife asks. There are tears in her eyes. She looks scared and I am pretty sure she just wants this to end.

"You know what they are. You know the kind of influence their son will give ours. I couldn’t let that happen,’’ he turns to his wife and I let him, slowly letting go of his face.

His eyes are cruel.

His words nonetheless.

"Why would you tell Max that?" she asks again.

He frowns "I don’t want him to be like them. I don’t want him exposed to that lifestyle.’’

His wife doesn’t seem to even know anything.

So, he did this all on his own. so, he should be the one to hurt. "What are talking about Bill. I don’t understand this.’’ she is desperate to understand his words.

I am desperate to hurt him.

"You know they are gay. You saw them during the open day. You saw how they didn’t even care that they were around children. How they were flaunting it all in front of everyone.’’

Flaunting it all in front of everyone?

The only thing I remember doing on the last open day was holding Beau’s hands and the kiss on his cheek. There was nothing explicit. I didn’t even do what I would usually do to him.

"What did you tell Max.’’

I wait.

He shakes his head "Nothing that he didn’t need to hear,’’ he looks away from her and back to me ’You have a problem with me because I hate your kind. Tell that to half the population. You can’t come to every one of our houses. You can’t bully us to accept you and your disgusting lifestyle,’’ he spits out angrily.

"You are right, I can’t possibly find all the fucking homophobes of the world but I can try. I have all the time in the world."

I reach for him this time and my hand wraps around his neck as I pull him off the bed. He cries out as I keep my hand around his neck until his back is to the wall "I could kill you right now and no one would know it was me. I could kill you and no one would fucking care or remember."

I feel my eyes glow. The heat within me from the anger I am feeling. I don’t care that I am showing myself to him.

"What are you?’’ he manages in between struggling to breathe.

A smile sprawls on my face "Oh, I am the monster that you said I was.’’ I reach for him sinking my teeth into his neck as his wife screams. I don’t stop as I make him hurt. This is not for my pleasure; this is for his pain.

Human beings are terrible.

They are selfish and self-destructive.

All through our conversation, he knew that I was upset. He knew that he was wrong but not once did even show remorse. His hate is so strong that he would rather bet his life on it.

He would rather die than apologize for hurting my son.

He would rather remain a hater than show regret.

********************

I get back to the house and sure enough, Beau is standing in front of the door. He is drenched too from the rain.

I expected that he would be here when I got home. He is dressed in a pair of black jeans and a white tee. There is a frown on his face. he is upset with me right now but I expected that too.

"Hi,’’ I smile.

He doesn’t answer me as he walks away from me and to the direction of the room. He wanted me to come home, I am home now and he is still angry.

Deep down, he knows that I didn’t kill that family but he needs me to confirm it. he is angry.

I follow him slowly as I watch him enter our room. I don’t, I walk into the kids’ room and they are asleep. Colm won’t remember this day because I will make sure that I only show him love. That the people around him only show him, love. I will dim the hate he got today with all the love I can give him.

I will make sure of that for as long as I live.

Chapter 647: Our universe

Beau

He knows I am upset and he is just walking around me in the room.

I need him to talk because I need to know what exactly he did.

"How was the meeting?’’ he asks even though he knows that I left before it was over.

I remain quiet.

He is not going to get a response from me until he tells me what he has done. Until he assures me that he didn’t hurt anyone.

"Are you really going to give me the silent treatment?" he slides closer to me in the bed. he is still dressed in his wet clothes. I have had a shower.

"You’re getting the bed wet,’’ I tell him.

He chuckles as he pulls me even closer. Even though his clothes are wet, his warmth is all I feel. I want to just let things go and just embrace him. he is back and that is all that should matter.

"Do you want me to let go?’’ he asks.

I sigh, running my hands through my hair. As his hands wrap around my waist tightly.

"What did you do Lanis?’’ I ask him finally because even though I am angry. I need to know if this is something that I will need to do damage control on.

"I didn’t kill them if that is what you are asking,’’ he pulls away from me slowly and I turn to him.

"I didn’t say you did. I just need to know what you did.’’

He sighs "Why am I the only one that is so upset. Why do I want to go back to their house and finish them off,’’ he shouts angrily.

Okay. He is still in his feelings about this and I have to thread this lightly. I have to make sure I say the right things. I have to make him feel better because he is my priority. He will always be my priority.

"Hey,’’ I grab his hands in mine, pulling him closer to me. I see the tears as they well up in his eyes. I don’t know if he feels regret for whatever he must have done but I trust him. I trust that he wouldn’t do anything terrible.

"I am angry. I am fucking pissed that for once in my fucking life, this is out of my control. I can’t make everyone on this earth accept us and our lifestyle. I can’t convince them that love will never be wrong. I can’t shield those beautiful babies from the outside world. there is nothing that I can do and I am upset.’’

When Colm narrated the incident to me. I felt like screaming. I felt like hurting the man that would indirectly hurt my kid. I wanted to kill him and his family. I was so angry but I had to stay strong. I had to think about things strategically.

I have a family, one that I never want to ever lose. So, I can’t be Beau I used to be. I can’t be reckless.

I have to think about them and that is all I do.

Every morning when I wake up, I think about them. I think about how happy I am, how happy I make them.

They are my universe.

Fuck.

Everything else is inconsequential.

"They hurt him, they hurt my baby,’’ he cries and I let him. Lanis rarely cries. He likes to be strong for me and I appreciate him. I appreciate him so much but for once, I want him to cry. I want to let it out and I want to be there for him.

I want to love him enough to take the pain away.

I don’t know if it makes sense but I will try. Every day., I will try to be the one that takes his pain away.

I hold him as his tears pour and I feel the pain slowly wash away with his tears. We are so connected, so connected that I can feel him. I know what he feels and right now, as I hold him in bed, I know that everything will be okay.

After a couple of silent minutes, he speaks up "I didn’t kill them." he says in the dead of the night.

I didn’t have to ask him to know that.

Lanis might have been upset but just the same way I would only think about him and my kids—he was thinking too. He knew he had to live right to look at those kids in the eyes.

He wasn’t a murderer and he wasn’t going to start.

"I hurt him so much. I wanted to kill him but I didn’t." I look at him and his eyes are on mine. he is still in my arms. "I just wanted him to hurt and that didn’t even give me the satisfaction that I wanted. It didn’t make me feel better." He confesses.

His words are honest.

He is pouring his heart out to me.

"I realized that it was pointless. Fighting one person, when the whole world was a vast fight that I wouldn’t win.’’

"We don’t have to think about the world. You, me, and the twins, we are our own world. We don’t need acceptance from anyone else,’’ I tell him.

He nods "It still hurts. I feel so helpless."

"You aren’t helpless. You are far from helpless. They know that you love them and trust me, that is all they need. They will have other friends. there will be people that wouldn’t care. All you need to do is love them. all we need to do is be there for them.’’

This is how I feel.

I have created this orbit. One that comprises of the pack and my kids. I don’t care about the outside world. I don’t care about the things that are happening. I don’t care about the people.

I only care about this orbit and hell it has made me the happiest man on earth.

He is all that matters.

Chapter 648: Gratitude

Alanis

"We didn’t mean to hurt anyone, please let us go,’’ the wife screams as blood gushes out of her husband’s neck.

I didn’t have any intentions of killing him but right now, at this moment. There is only pain in his eyes. No fucking remorse.

He doesn’t think he has done anything wrong and that is what is irking me so much right now.

I don’t want to kill him.

I feel like I have to.

"Please. Please don’t kill him.’’ her voice is desperate. She is not the problem. She is just in love with the problem and if I kill him, I will be killing someone that she loves.

I would be hurting her when this is not her fault.

The only person that could talk me out of anything is Beau and he is not here right now because I locked him out of my head. I did that because I didn’t want anyone to talk me out of my anger.

It is fucking validated.

I have every right to feel this way.

I have every right to want to kill him.

"Please Alanis,’’ she calls me by my name and that catches me off guard. I remember meeting them. I remember seeing them in the twins’ school but I don’t even remember their names.

"How do you know my name?’’ I ask her as her husband moves away from me. there is blood all over his shirt. He is crying out in pain but he is not my focus right now.

"I know you. My son is a fan of yours. He can’t stop talking about him. of course, I know you,’’ she manages a faint smile "I don’t have any problem with them being friends. I didn’t know that my husband did this. I would have never let it happen and I am sorry,’’ she manages.

When I came Into the room, she acted like she didn’t know me but all along, she did.

"I understand how you feel. I understand why you are angry but please don’t use violence to try to quench that anger. Don’t be like him, don’t let this be what defines you."

I know she is just trying to talk me out of it. she is scared for her life—and I mean that literally.

I just literally bit her husband and he is bleeding on their bed.

In her eyes, I am a monster and she is just trying to talk me out of this but she is not wrong.

I don’t want this to get the best of me, I have a beautiful family.

I am not a monster like they said. I don’t want to prove them right.

No.

*******************

I open my eyes and Beau is holding unto me. quickly, I look out the window and the sky is still dark.

Somehow, this soothes me.

Nighttime.

I don’t want tomorrow to come because I don’t know if I can stop thinking about what I did. I don’t know if I can forgive myself for getting so angry. you know when you convince yourself that you are doing the right thing. At that moment, it seems like such a good idea, until you have finally done it.

That is how I feel.

The aftermath of my decision.

I had to wipe their memories. I had to make them forget the encounter. I had to heal them.

They would never remember but I would.

I would remember how I stooped so low and hurt people. I hurt them because of my anger.

"Hey, you, okay?’’

I turn and Beau is looking at me with concern etched on his face.

Am I okay?

I don’t know.

"She knew who I was,’’ I mutter so quietly that he pulls away from me slowly and sits up so that he can hear me clearly.

"Who?’’

"Thelma, Max’s mother.’’

He manages a smile but I can see the confusion in his eyes. He doesn’t know how to react to this moment. He doesn’t know what I am talking about.

"She said Max adored Colm. She said he said they were going to be friends for a long time."

He watches me, slowly reaching for my hand and taking in his "I went there with not thoughts. I just wanted to cause them as much pain as they did my baby but she didn’t even know what her husband did. She didn’t want the same things he did.’’

I take a deep breath as tears start to fall out of my eyes. I need to erase the last couple of hours of my life.

I need to forget about the anger that I felt.

I need to remember that because there are people that will never accept us, doesn’t mean that there aren’t people that will.

There will be a million and more people like Max’s father but there will also be people like Thelma.

"I made a mistake. I know that I want to be better.’’

I might have lived for a long time but I learn every day. I make mistakes just like humans do. I feel pain, fear, and insecurities.

I am learning and I want to grow as a person. I want to be someone that my kids can be proud of.

I will be that person.

"You know if you hadn’t gone there. I just might and I might not have had the restraint that you did. I might not have been strong enough to control myself. So, thank you Lanis baby, for doing that for us. Thank you for being the balance I need in my life.’’ He kisses my knuckles softly and I close my eyes. his words are tugging at my heartstring.

His words are everything.

"Thank you for being the incredible person that I fell in love with all those years. Thank you for loving those children so much that you would fight for their happiness."

They might just be words but I feel them all in my core.

They resonate inside me and for the first time tonight, I smile and it is a genuine one.

Chapter 649: The evil thoughts that comes with child birth sometimes

Jabi

I hear her.

Crying for the third time since Darrien put her down and I am losing my mind. Fuck, I know it is my turn. I mean Darrien has gone to her the two times she woke up and I can’t understand why she is crying.

What is wrong with her?

Why don’t you go to her and find out?

My wolf tells me—or should I say scolds me.

Darrien has noticed my receptive behavior towards our baby. That’s why he took me away from the community for a week. He said it was just a vacation from all the crazy. He wanted to me to relax. He said I deserved it.

I didn’t even think about leaving her behind and I should feel like shit but I didn’t. I was happy about the break. Happy that we would finally be alone. I know that makes me a terrible father. I have been feeling like a terrible father all throwing this journey.

It is easy for Dar.

It almost came naturally to him and she actually likes him.

Why don’t you try calling her name for once?

My wolf adds. The anger inside me is strong. I know that my wolf wants to get lost in the bond of our child. I want the same thing but I haven’t felt it. every time I hold her, she cries. I don’t know what to do and I can’t talk to anyone because I told Darrien that I was ready for this. I wanted this so much but the pregnancy was hell.

It messed with me mentally and now all I remember is the pain that I went through.

Tala.

My daughter.

"I’ll get her,’’ I hear his voice as he shuffles on the bed. he knows that I am awake. He could probably sense that I didn’t want to go to her. I feel him shift closer to me; I feel him plant a soft kiss on my temple.

That is his way of assuring me. that is his way of telling me that I can talk to him and I know that but I don’t want to disappoint him.

I don’t want him to tell him the thoughts that are running through my head. I don’t want him to see me for who I really am at this point in my life.

You don’t want to love your daughter.

My wolf edges and I close my eyes even though I know that I can’t block his voice out of my head.

I want to shout and scream. Assure me that I do. I love her.

It shouldn’t be something that I need to convince anyone of but why do those three words keep ringing in my head. Why is there a question mark at the end of those thoughts?

I hear Dar in her room. I know that he is comforting her because the crying stops and his beautiful voice travels through the room. He is singing to her, probably kissing her.

I only kissed her once and that was when she was born. I have been pretending and acting like I am okay.

I don’t love our daughter.

Fuck, Why can’t I say those words out loud? There is something wrong with me and I need to talk to Darrien. Maybe he will understand.

Will he?

Do you think that is a good thing to say out loud? You don’t love your daughter. The one you gave birth to?

These are the evil thoughts that have made me so quiet. it is all in my head. Not in the hands of my wolf. Just me and me alone.

The door opens and Darrien smiles at me widely. His eyes wide awake "You know Tala is such an attention seeker. She kept clinging unto me, didn’t want to let me go,’’ he walks over to the bed and sits down. The smile is still on his face.

The love shining in his eyes.

He loves her.

Maybe he can love her enough for both of us.

Since I am incapable of that.

You are not. Just hold her. Do it with all your heart.

My wolf tells me encouragingly.

She would only cry.

She always cries when I hold her.

"Come here,’’ Darrien stretches his arms out to me as he lies down next to me "I need to hold you right now,’’ he mutters as I let him.

His scent feels me up completely.

My heart beats for him.

"Are you okay?’’ he asks in the quiet of the night.

My heart stops.

I don’t want to see right through me. I don’t want him to know how I really feel. I don’t want him to hate me.

"Yeah.’’ I lie.

I rarely lie to him.

I hate this so much.

"You sure. You are awfully quiet.’’

"I am just tired I guess."

"If you are tired. Why have you been awake for the last four hours?’’

I haven’t been able to sleep.

The thoughts are haunting my dreams.

"Well, her cries should be a reason. I guess." I smile. It is supposed to be funny, but he pulls away from me slightly and raises a brow in confusion.

"Her cries?’’

"Yeah, you gotta admit, it is a lot."

His expression shifts from confusion to a frown. Now he is angry and I sure have ruined it.

"How about you try and act like a parent and maybe she will stop crying,’’ he moves away completely and stands up from the bed.

Dar never talks to me this way.

He is now for her.

"Where are you going?’’ I ask him as he walks to the door. He doesn’t turn around as he answers me.

"I will sleep with TALA tonight,’’ he mutters and there is a hint of sadness in his voice.

I fucked things up with my joke.

It was supposed to be light but he is upset and it is all my fault. I don’t love my child and now he is angry.

I am going to lose him because of her.

Not because of her. Because of you.

My wolf says and this makes me sad.

What is wrong with me?

Chapter 650: Worries and a search for a solution

Darrien

"Have you ever hated your kids, even for a second?’’ I ask Lanis out of the blue.

He raises a brow "Huh?’’

I sigh running my hands through my hair.

This is messing with me.

Fuck.

"Like, have you ever gotten angry with the twins and just wished you never had them?’’

"Dude, what is this about?’’ he asks concerned.

I don’t know.

"Jabi.’’

"Do you want to talk about it? You seem very worried,’’ he walks over to me and sits down on one of the stools in the kitchen. He was making lunch for the kids; I was just watching him. Deep in thoughts about last night.

Jabi hasn’t talked to me since I stormed out of our room and I don’t even want him to. I don’t know the right words to say to him right now. I don’t know what is going on with him and it seems like he doesn’t even want to talk to me about it.

I just know that he doesn’t feel the same things that I feel for that bundle of joy in our life.

"I think he hates Tala,’’ I confess those words and this is the first time I have actually said those words out since she was born. It has been hell. I feel like I have been alone. I feel like all the love I have for her is not there in his heart. This thing between us was supposed to bring us closer, but it is only driving us apart.

"He doesn’t hate her. You can’t say that.’’

I scoff "I have been trying to look for a way to talk to him about this. Ask him, see if he is okay. I don’t think he is. I have noticed too many things."

He furrows his brows "Like what?"

I take a deep breath as I remember the night we brought her back home from the infirmary.

I think about his reaction and how he was.

***********

"You hold her,’’ Jabi says as he pushes her to me. I don’t have any reasons not to collect her from him.

This is the most excited I have been since forever.

I have a daughter.

This little bundle in my arms is my daughter.

I peep into the blanket and her eyes are closed. She is sleeping soundly. It has been two weeks since she came into this world and I still can’t get enough of her. She is beautiful. She looks exactly like Jabi. Her eyes, her tiny lips.

Everything about her is perfect and I am in complete awe of her. "She is so beautiful,’’ I say as I hold her closer to me and take a whiff of her scent. From the hospital, it has been engraved within me. I will forever recognize her until the day I die.

I look up to Jabi slightly as he walks over to the couch. He is dressed in a pair of shorts and my shirt. I am the one that picked out his clothes. He has healed nicely and almost looks to be back to normal.

There is just something about him.

Something that I can’t read and it is weird for me not to be able to read him.

"I need a shower,’’ he exclaims as he rests his back on the couch. His eyes are closed, he looks exhausted. I don’t blame. It wasn’t easy. I wasn’t able to do anything but be there for him. I sit down next to him with Tala in my arms. She is still sleeping.

"Do you want me to join you? I can put her down and we could...." His eyes light up from my suggestion. The excitement is evident. He wants this. At least, he will never get tired of our intimacy.

"Yeah," he smiles "I’d like that."

He leans forward and I welcome him as he kisses me softly. This kiss is inviting. My body responds to him, completely eager for me.

Tala shuffles in my arms and I hear her squeals that always leads to her crying. He pulls away from me and I see him look at her as she starts to cry. There is an expression on his face, it almost looks like anger, but it can’t be. Right?

"Hey there,’’ I pat her gently, still looking at him intently. I am trying to figure out what is wrong but I can’t pinpoint it and I don’t want to look for problems where there are none.

"I should go shower now,’’ he tells me, detaching from me and our baby and leaving the room.

He doesn’t bat an eye as he closes the room door and a couple of minutes later, I hear the shower running. I take Tala to her room, the one I prepared for her while he was in the hospital and I feed her.

Jabi doesn’t come back to check on her the whole night, it almost seems like he doesn’t care about her...almost.

**********

I tell Alanis and he listens to me.

All through, I thought it was just in my head. I wanted to give him time and space to understand what is happening. Before this happened, he said he was ready and he convinced me but now, I feel like maybe he just wasn’t.

"He could have post-partum?" Alanis tells me calmly like that is the most logical explanation.

I frown at his words. "Is that even possible for our kind?’’ I know what post-partum is but I can’t even imagine Jabi in that light. This worries me more because as the words leave Alanis’s lips, it all makes sense and everything seems to be coming to play.

"How do I handle this? How do I make him better?’’ That is all I want to do. I just want to get the old Jabi back—is that even possible? Things have changed, we are both different people from all our experiences. I don’t want the old Jabi back but I just want him to be happy.